HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.07 – Clash of the Champions Day 1

Hello fans and welcome to our August PPV Clash of the Champions.  It has been an extremely interesting ride so far and only expect it to just get better.  The event starts off with the camera panning the crowd and we see Superfans Derek and Joel.  Joel’s first sign reads “Let’s Go Shizzle clap clap clap clap clap” and Derek’s reads “Professor Cobra = professor of crap”.  That last one seems pretty harsh seeing as the Professor just started with us.  Oh well, everyone is entitled to their opinions.  Announcers Marc and Brian head to ringside to take their seats.

Marc: This place is ELECTRIC.  People are busting from the rafters.

Brian: You got that right buddy.  This is going to be one hell of a show.  The excitement here is none like I’ve ever seen before. 
Marc:  I’ve been to an NFL Superbowl once.  This crowd blows them away.
Brian:  Really, you’re comparing wrestling to the NFL?  Damn, you beat me to it.  Ha, ha.
Marc: You’re a real riot Alice.  Hey, look, Master Bull is on his way down.

Master Bull makes his way down to the ring to a very mixed reaction.  It seems that one side of the arena is just booing and hissing at him.  The other side seems to be Pro-Bull.  “Welcome one and all to our Clash of the Champions PPV.  We have a spectacular show lined up for you and it promises to meet all your expectations.  To our fans who couldn’t attend live, WHAT THE HELL?  Are you just that cheap that you can’t get off your damn sofa and attend a show?  I know we are sold out but still…I do expect people to wait in line and then have to be told to leave once a show is sold out.  I’m using our hard earned money to bring you these events and to those of you who attend live, Thank You.  To the rest of you, get a life.  When I say that, I do mean that Wrestling = Life so get to the events, even if I have to tell you to go home because you’re too slow in getting there.”  Now, the entire stadium is hissing at him. “What?  I saying nice things about you.  What more do you want?  Ah screw it.  Dallas, you suck from your smelly streets down to your football team.  Enough of me talking here, let’s get on with the show.”

The pyro goes off as the first match kicks off.  The USO’s make their way to the ring hollering and yelling at the fans as they head to ringside.  They are then followed by King Mo Lawal and Mr. Wrestling 4.  Both men high five the fans as they make their way to the ring.  Mr. Wrestling 4 stops in front of Derek who is just berating him.  4 blows him off.   The bell rings.  “Slow count Sam” is the ref for this one.   Jimmy hits a toss up samoan drop and then 4 hits the ring. They double team Jimmy.  Mo hits a left hand jab and 4 executes a reverse neckbreaker.  The USO’s then double team King Mo.  Mo is able to escape without any damage but they corner him.  Jimmy holds Mo while Jey hits a Polynesian death leap.  Mo hits Jey with an elbow smash knocking him from the ring.  Mo then blasts Jimmy with a spinning backfist.  Jey gets tagged in and then Mr. Wrestling 4 comes in.  Mo nails a waistlock takedown and ride and then 4 launches Jey over the top rope.  He lands hard on the ground.  Mo nails Jimmy with the Royal Flush sending him flying to the opposite side of the ring.  The ref makes the count (ungodly slow) and counts Jey down and out.  Mr. Wrestling 4 and King Mo get the win.  Derek changed his sign to “Mr Wrestling 4 = boring”.

Up next is Casey Jones taking on Dean Ambrose for the Internet Media title.  This is Casey’s official last shot at this belt.  For this match, the ref is “Fast Count Frank”.  Unfortunately, it did not bode well for the challenger.

Casey tried to hold his own but just could not keep up with Ambrose.  At the 20 minute mark, Mankind made his way down to ringside.  He took Casey’s hockey stick and started to walk off with it.  Ambrose uses the distraction to hit the Chickenwing Facebuster and got the 1-2-3.  After the match, Mankind gets in the ring and starts to wallop Casey with the hockey stick.  Suits came from the back to break it up.  Casey appears to need some stitches.

 
Brian: DAMN that Mankind.  DAMN him to HELL.
Marc: Easy there buddy.  I’m sure Mankind will get his just desserts sooner rather than later.  But now, the Bella’s are up and they should be very easy on the eyes.
Brian: You are so right.  Although, if Fusion and the Spider can’t get on the same page, I don’t think they’ll have a win tonight.

Out next comes the Bella Twins followed by Spider Violet and Fusion Valentine.  They were accompanied by Bran-Don-Goh.  The Bella’s took full advantage of the discord between their opponents to control the entire match.  At the 29 minute mark, the Bella’s got a little cocky and didn’t see the double team coming.  Brie gets caught and is choked on the ropes by Spider Violet.  Fusion then dumps her to the outside where she gets counted out.  Fusion and Spider get the win.  Bran-Don-Goh gets in the ring and motions to Fusion.  Fusion then turns and attacks Spider Violet.  She beats her down and then tosses her from the ring.  She gets on the mic “You know, you have held me back for too long and now, I’m through with you.  Now that I no longer have you hanging on my coattails, I am free to pursue the Women’s title.  I wipe my hands of you.”  Bran-Don-Goh and Fusion Valentine leave together.

Next up is our first EVER inter-gender match up with ODB challenging the Miz for the HWF X-Division title.   Master Bull then came out and asked for ODB to sign a waiver.  This would protect them if she got hurt too bad.  He then gave Miz a document to sign.  This one stated that there would only be one shot at this.  If Miz were to lose, he will NOT get an automatic rematch.  He was not happy about it but signed it anyway (under threat of being stripped of the title if he did not).  The match goes 16 minutes with Miz just getting killed by ODB.  She really wants this title.  About 5 minutes in, Miz hits ODB with a snap DDT but she comes back with the Dirty Dozen but only a one count.  He tired for a second DDT but ODB neutralized it.  Miz connects with a legsweep facebuster and goes for a pin but ODB kicks out at 2.  ODB locks in a bearhug and follows it up with some chops and a pin attempt but Miz kicks out at 2.  She follows it up with a fallaway slam but Miz rolls out of the ring.  Miz hits a basement dropkick but ODB hits the dirty dozen.  She tries for the pin but Miz kicks out.  They trade a few more pin attempts on each other but at the 20 minute mark, ODB nails a fallaway slam and then drops some chops on a prone Miz.  She makes the cover and the ref counts 1……2…….3.  ODB gets the win and is the NEW X-DIVISION CHAMPION.  ODB celebrates in the ring.  Superfan Joel is holding up a sign that reads “ODB >most wrestlers” and Derek yells at and mocks the Miz for losing to a woman (albeit a monster of a woman).

Marc:  My God, that match was insane.

Brian:  I know buddy.  ODB is truly a force to be reckoned with.  Miz will get a rematch though, just not tonight.
Marc: Miz was the longest reigning X-Division Champion so he does deserve it.
Brian: Don’t be surprised though if ODB throws a stipulation or two out there.

Next up on the card is the rematch between Eric Young and Professor Cobra.  Cobra starts off with the flying mamba spinning heel kick and EY eats it.  Cobra then hits the cobra armdrag and EY hits him with a clubbing forearm.  He follows it up with a top rope elbow drop and Cobra is absorbing the punishment.  He battles back with a cobra superkick and EY nails a second rope piledriver.  He goes for the pin but the Professor kicks out at 2.   Eric goes for a top rope elbow drop but gets caught by Cobra hitting the Flying Mamba. EY falls to the mat.  Cobra sets him up for another Mamba but EY reverses it, goes for a low blow that gets reversed as Cobra tries for the cobra clutch bulldog but EY holds the ropes nullifying the move.  Both men are glaring at each other.  Cobra tries for the Clutch of the Cobra cross armbar but EY nullifies that also.  The Professor hits the Cobra facebreaker and goes for a pin but EY kicks out at 2.  Cobra hits the cobra strike spear but EY whips and rams him into the turnbuckle.  Cobra tosses Eric out of the ring and then goes to the top rope and hits the King Cobra diving headbutt.  He rolls back in just at the ref counts to 10.  Professor Cobra gets the win via countout.  After the match, EY gets back in the ring and hits a low blow.  He hits the Showstopper Neckbreaker and then leaves the Professor down and out.

 
Brian: Buddy, I don’t think we’ve seen the last of these two guys.
Marc: You’re right Brian.  As soon as the Professor wakes up, he is going to want revenge.

Next up on the card is Ravishing Raquel vs Layla El for the Women’s title.  Ravishing Raquel comes out first accompanied by The Elitist Reid Rothchild.  The Women’s Champion follows right afterwards.  Reid gives Raquel a kiss for good luck and then slips her something on his way out of the ring.  What was that?  Raquel dominates the champion and for 22 minutes, she is on fire. She ends up hitting Raquel with the foreign object knocking out Layla.  She locks in the Ravishing Chickenwing and the ref checks up on her but there is no response so Raquel wins the match and the Women’s title via submission.  Layla gets her immediate rematch. 

There is a new ref for this second match and it is “Fast Count Frank”.  Before he gets in the ring, Reid gives him something.  What is this?  A payoff?  Raquel stars off by tossing Layla over the top rope.  Layla barely makes it in by 9. That count did seem pretty fast.   Raquel connects with a  Power full nelson and Layla takes her down with a clothesline. Raquel hits a spinning heel kick and then tosses Layla to the outside again.  Fast count Frank counts quickly but Layla is back in at 9 and then chokes Raquel on the ropes.  Raquel tosses Layla out again and follows her out.  She hits the Simply Ravishing and Layla goes down.  Raquel rolls back in the ring as Frank counts to 10.  Raquel wins the match and is the official Women’s Champion!

 
Marc:  Wow, can you believe it?  Ravishing Raquel has just won the Women’s Championship.
Brian:  I’m heading to the ring to interview the new champ.
Marc: Wait….

Brian heads to the ring as Ravishing Raquel and Reid Rothchild are celebrating in the ring.

Brian: Sorry to intrude but Raquel, you have just won the Women’s title.  How are you feeling?
Raquel: Listen PEST, get out of the ring.  This time belongs to Reid and I. 
Reid: Take a hike, stumpy.

Brian sulks out of the ring and goes back to the table.  Marc tries to console him “Hey buddy, I tried to stop you.”

In the ring, Reid has the microphone.  “Raquel, today you have proven yourself to be worthy of team Prestige Inc.  In fact, I want to take this opportunity to (he gets down on one knee) ask you to MARRY me.”  Raquel jumps in his arms and screams “Yes, Yes, Yes”.  They smooch and then finally leave the ring.

Our first World title match is up with Christian taking on US Champion AJ Styles.  This one didn’t go too long as Christian picks up with win with the Unprettier at the 10 minute mark after Mankind came out and distracted AJ.  This of course led to Casey Jones coming out and brawling with Mankind.

Next up is Brock Lesnar taking on HHH for the HWF World title.  It had been decided that this would be Lights out match.  This one also did not go very long.  “Slow Count Sam” is the ref on this one.  HHH begins by tossing Lesnar out of the ring.  Lesnar hits a bare-knuckled swing and hits the ref by mistake.  HHH then hits a Pedigree but there is no ref to make the count.  Both men then collide when trying to hit haymakers on each other.  They are both down but again, no ref to count.  HHH is up first and hits a Pedigree but Lesnar bounces back and hits a powerbomb.  He then follows it up with smashing HHH’s head into the ringpost drawing blood.  Somehow HHH manages to toss Brock from the ring.  HHH hits the pedigree again and Brock makes it to the ropes by the time the ref is back up.  HHH is complaining to the ref and Brock then nails a huge powerslam.  He makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3.  Brock Lesnar retains the title.  HHH is now on his way to the unemployment line.  Brock leaves and HHH stays for a bit soaking in the chants from the crowd “Thank You HHH”.  Hunter leaves with a tear in his eye.

Since both Brock and Christian retained their respective titles, their match tomorrow night will be for the Undisputed Heavyweight Championshp.

Next up is the HWF Invitational battle royal to see who will get a title shot at whichever belt they want.  The 8 men competing here are Tensai, Reid Rothchild, RVD, Professor Cobra, The Miz, Christopher Daniels, Kane and the Undertaker.  In order of elimination:  Taker ousted Daniels; Reid eliminated RVD, Miz took out Kane, Tensai tamed the Cobra, Taker easily removes Reid, Tensai ends Miz’s quest.  The last men standing were Tensai and the Undertaker.  This final battle went 13 minutes with Undertaker getting the win after hitting the Last Ride and dumping Tensai over the top rope.  Undertaker will get a shot at whichever belt he wants.

“WAIT JUST A MINUTE!” screams Master Bull. “What the HELL was THAT?  Who put the Undertaker in that match?  Undertaker is the property of CSWA and they are not participating in this battle royal.  Sorry Taker but you don’t win SHIT.  I want the battle royal to start over again and this time, I want Kane and RVD out also.  I want to give some other people a shot and even though I despise Reid Rothchild, you can’t argue with his winning record.  I am also turning this into a 16 man battle royal.  The participants will be Tensai, Reid, Cobra, Chavo Jr, Uncle Nova, Austin Aries, EY, Daniels, Roderick Strong, Zema Ion, Kaz, James Storm, Anderson, Jack Swagger, Cody Rhodes and Antonio Cesaro.

This one was quick too.  Reid eliminated Zema Ion; Storm over Swagger; Chavo over the Professor (EY helped); Daniels over Strong; Cesaro over Nova (Reid helped); Kaz over EY (Professor distracted Young); Aries over Tensai; Cody and Anderson was a double elimination; Storm eliminated Reid (Nova interfered); Chavo over Daniels; Cesaro over Kaz; Storm over Chavo; Cesaro over Aries.  This left James Storm and Antonio Cesaro.  Their match actually went 54 minutes with both men trading high spots.  The end came after Cesaro fell victim to the Eye of the Storm.  James Storm gets the win and will get a shot at whichever HWF title he wants.

The main event of the night is John Cena taking on Ryback in a Double Hell in the Cell.  This is the final match between these two.  The loser of the match will be moved over to the HWF in a trade.  Ryback starts off with a clubbing forearm and Cena hits a piledriver on an exploding C4 board.  Ryback is bleeding and dazed.  Cena hits a knuckle jam.  Ryback tries to hit an overhead belly to belly suplex but Cena neutralized it.  Cena does the “You can’t see me” and then gets nailed by the Meathook Clothesline.  Ryback goes for the pin but John kicks out at 2.  Cena goes to rap with the crowd and turns around into a backpack stunner.  Cena stomps on the face of Ryback but Ryback battles back with a  clubbing forearm.  Cena hits a 5 knuckle shuffle and goes for a pin but Ryback kicks out at 2.  Cena nails the F-U but Ryback pops up and nails a power bomb.  He then hits Cena with a suplex onto an exploding landmine.  Cena is disoriented.  Ryback takes Cena out of the ring and throws him into a pane of glass.  Cena is cut and bleeding.  Ryback jumps from the apron and hits a diving headbutt.  He tosses John back in the ring and hits the Meathook.  He goes for the pin but John kicks out a 1.  Ryback hits a powerslam and then while waiting for Cena to get up, he brings in a pane of glass into the ring.  Cena gets up and Ryback hits a suplex into the glass pane.  Cena collapses.  Ryback makes the cover and the ref counts 1…2…3.  Ryback gets the win.  John Cena will be traded to the HWF.

Brian:  Holy Crap, that’s a lot of blood.

Marc: You know, it had to end this way between the two of them.  If it did not, we’d see endless Cena/Ryback matches.  Enough is enough.  Done is done.
Brian:  I get your point buddy but that is a lot of blood.
Marc: (rolls his eyes)
Brian: That’s the end of our matches for tonight.  Thank you for watching.  Day 2 begins tomorrow.
Marc:  Good night all.

All of a sudden, music hits and it is none other than “The original Big Daddy” Donnie B and MW3.  Both are on their way to the ring in wheelchairs.  Both men have assorted casts and braces on.  They pull out their crutches and limp their way into the ring.  MW3 looks like his mouth is wired shut.  That must have been after Mr. Wrestling 4 broke his jaw.  Both men are in the ring and barely standing on their crutches.  “Fans from around the world…we are back.  The HWF and CSWA are our homes and we could never leave them but circumstances being what they are, it is very likely neither of us will ever wrestle again.  (fans begin to chant “Thank you Both”) We have both given or blood, sweat and tears to these federations and it is with a sad and heavy heart, we both must hang up our boots for the greater good of our health.”  “One more match” chants rang out.  “You know, I really wish we could go out at the top of our game but sometimes you have to just take what life hands you.”

Over the loud speaker, we hear mock clapping and “Boo, Hoo, Hoo” ringing out. 

Out comes Negronomicon.  “Ohhh, did you stub your toe?  Are your feelings hurt?  Well you know what?  You both got exactly what was coming to you.  MW3, you sonofabitch.  You almost cost me MY career.  Payback is a bitch.  Donnie B, my longtime friend/enemy.  You are no better.  In fact, you are just as guilty.  You cost me so much over the last decade that it is just ridiculous beyond belief.  You cost me titles, matches and yes, even this crap ass federation that I owned at one time.  You set me up for failure from the beginning.  Well, this is a fitting end to your tyranny.  You’re done.  In a way, I’m almost sad that this is happening this way.  I would have preferred to end your career in the ring but this is almost as fitting.”  Donnie B fired back “You know, I was actually coming out here to apologize.  Now, I don’t think so.  Everything I did was for the betterment of MY federations.  Some things went too far, sure.  But they were all never personal; until now.  Not until you crashed my wedding some 5 years ago was this personal and then YOU made it that way.  Every bad thing that happened to you was no ones fault but your own.  You will continue to blame everyone else for your shortcomings.  You will never grow up and never take responsibility for what you do yourself.”  Negronomicon interrupted “My fault?  Everything is MY fault?  YOU made the matches.  YOU put me in dangerous situations.  It was never just about ‘just business’. For you, it was always personal.”  Negronomicon then marched down to the ring.  Donnie B and MW3 held their crutches in a defensive position.  All of a sudden, the Mexicali Flyers ran down.  They got in the ring to protect Donnie B and MW3.  “What is this?” Negronomicon asked.  “Is this your protection?  Really, if I wanted to do anymore, do you think these nobodies could stop me?  I am the F*CKING NEGRONOMICON.”  Out then came Marshall William Pearl (where was Cowboy Shizzle?) and he got the Negronomicon to calm down.  “One last thing bitches; Stay out of my ring.  This is my yard now.  You had your time in the sun now get the f*ck out.”  Negronomicon walked back out with Marshall Pearl.  To end the show, Donnie B and MW3 shook hands the best they could with fans from their wheelchairs.

That is all for now.  Stay tuned for the next part of our Clash of the Champions show.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.06 – almost forgot

Hello there.  I forgot to mention in the last issue that due to the number of matches we have for the Clash, the PPV will be taking place over 2 days.   There promises to be some great matches.  The final card (ha, ha Master Bull, you can’t change it) will look like this:

 

Clash of the Champions – Day One:
King Mo Lawal and Mr. Wrestling 4 vs. the USO’s
Casey Jones vs Dean Ambrose for the Internet Media title (CSWA)
Spider Violet and Fusion Valentine vs The Bella twins
The Miz vs ODB for the X-Division title (HWF)
Professor Cobra vs Eric Young
Ravishing Raquel vs Layla El for the Women’s title
Christian vs AJ Styles for the CSWA World title
Brock Lesnar vs HHH for the HWF World title
John Cena vs Ryback in a Double Hell in the Cell
HWF top 8 battle royal to determine who gets the future title shot.
 

Clash of the Champions Day 2:

Super Warrior vs Bran-Don-Goh
King Damian Sandow vs. Mike “the Axe” Medley for the European title (CSWA). 
AJ Styles vs Mankind for the US title (CSWA)
Mexicali Flyers w/ El Chango vs Law and Order and the Negronomicon
Jay Lethal vs CM Punk for the IC title (HWF)
Daniel Bryan vs Christopher Daniels for the North American title
The Shield vs BJ Whitmer/Jeff Hardy for the World tag team titles
The Elitist Reid Rothchild vs Uncle Nova
HWF World champion vs CSWA World champion for a title shot against the Undisputed Champion
Undisputed Heavyweight Champion vs ????

This just in.  We have heard that Donnie B and MW3 will make an appearance.  We hope they are doing ok.

Stay tuned.  The fun is about to begin.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.05 – The Clash is almost upon us.

Hello fans.  We are here live in Humble, TX and on the final leg of our journey to the Clash of the Champions.  The night starts off with Master Bull coming out.  “Well, for those of you who don’t know our past, the HWF began here, in Humble, Tx over a decade ago.  The days of Donnie B running all over the talent and holding key people like the Negronomicon down, well, it’s just time for new blood.  Under my reign, I will take the HWF and CSWA to heights never before experienced.  I’m that damn good.”  Master Bull heads to the ring. “With that out of the way, I want to call down both HHH and Brock Lesnar.  I want the two of you out here now.”  HHH comes out first and heads to the ring.  He is followed by Brock.  “This is the contract for your match at the Clash.  HHH, signing this, you agree that to the stipulation that if you lose, you are done in the ring.  Brock, your world title AND potential shot at the Undisputed title are on the line here.  If you both agree, sign this.”  He hands the document to HHH who looks it over and then signs.  He hands it back and Master Bull then gives it to Brock Lesnar.  Brock goes to sign it and as soon as he finishes, HHH hits him.  HHH pounds down the HWF champ.  He goes for the sledgehammer.  “HANG ON” yells Master Bull.  “HHH, drop the hammer.  If you lay one more finger on him, the title match is off.  Brock, the same goes for you.  Neither of you are allowed to come into any contact with each other.  This means no hitting each other with a chair, no kicking, throwing other wrestlers into each other – Yeah, HHH, I know that is what you were thinking.  Your match is only a few days away.  HHH, I ask you to take off.”  HHH leaves smiling at Brock who is just steaming.  “Brock, I know you want to blow off some steam so you will get to wrestle now against this man.”   Out comes Cowboy Shizzle.  Shizzle does not look pleased.  “Cowboy, if you will, you have a match.”

Brock had fun…29 minutes of it.  He took delight in beating down Cowboy Shizzle but it was not as easy as Brock had expected.  The Cowboy actually fought back and it wasn’t as one-sided as we thought it would.  At one point, Marshall William Pearl came out and tried to distract Brock.  It didn’t work.  Brock jumped out of the ring and chased Pearl around 3x.  Pearl almost got caught but the Cowboy ended up sacrificing himself for his partner.  In the end, Brock gets the win with a Press and Slam.  After the match, Pearl came back out and helped his partner to the back.

King Damian Sandow was interviewed in the back by Flyin Brian.  Sandow had to keep telling Brian how to hold the microphone.  Sandow kept it short and sweet.  The European title was coming to the HWF and there was nothing Medley could do about it.

Marvelous Marc was also in the back mediating a conversation between John Cena and Ryback (not a very good place to be).  He kept trying to get these two to open up on why they hated each other so much but in the end, Marc feared for his life so he left.

Bran-Don-Goh was in the back with Spider Violet and Fusion Valentine.  B was gloating about how he got a win (albeit via countout) over the champion.  The women were just fawning over him; batting their eyes.  In walks Professor Cobra.  He congratulated B and asked if he would be painting a target on himself now that he does have a win over the champ.  Bran-Don-Goh thought about it for a minute and asked if the Professor was trying to stir up trouble.  Cobra said no but B didn’t believe him.  He challenged him to a match.

Both Bran-Don-Goh and Professor Cobra went out to the ring for their match.  B starts off with a flying calf kick and the Professor nails the cobra clutch bulldog.  The Professor goes for the bulldog again but it gets reversed and B hits a leapfrog body guillotine.  He follows it up with a body avalanche and the Professor comes back with the cobra strike spear.  Professor Cobra tosses Bran-Don-Goh from the ring but he is back in at 6.  He gets back in and hits the ‘said so’ stunner and Cobra nails the flying mamba spinning heel kick twice.  Cobra then locks in a clutch of the cobra cross armbar and goes for a pin but B kicks right out.  B is up and nails the stunner.  Cobra hits a king cobra diving headbutt and goes for the pin but B kicks out again.  B is up and hits a leapfrog body guillotine.  Cobra goes for the headbutt again but it gets reversed and B goes for the stunner but the Professor holds the ropes to neutralize the hold.  As he turns around, B nails another guillotine.  Bran-Don-Goh hits two backhand chops and then eats a cobra strike spear.  Cobra follows it up with a Cobra double knee facebreaker.  He makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3 at the 14 minute mark.

In the audience, Superfan Derek is holding up a sign “Bran-Don-Goh is a Dancing with the Stars reject” and Joel’s sign says “What in the blue hell am I watching?”

In the back, Marc is interviewing Handsome G with the Mexicali Flyers and El Chango.  Marc congratulates them on their win over the Shield.  Handsome G thanks El Chango for stepping up.  El Chango says that he speaks for the team when he says that they want the 6 Man tag team titles.  Nothing will stop them.

Elsewhere, Brian is interviewing Law and Order with the Negronomicon. Negronomicon says that at the Clash, he will make his own announcement regarding Donnie B.  He says the fans have waited long enough and will get to finally hear the truth.

Bran-Don-Goh was not happy after his loss to Professor Cobra.  He can be heard muttering to himself “Why has the Super Warrior forsaken me?  Was I not his number one fan?  In my time of need, where is he?”

Casey Jones runs into CSWA Internet Media Champion Dean Ambrose.  Ambrose says that Casey better not do anything to get himself disqualified because it is his last chance at the title.  Casey asks what the hell is he talking about.  Ambrose shows the contract stating that it is indeed Casey’s last shot at the title.  Ambrose says he best bring his A game.  Casey stood there looking puzzled.

King Mo Lawal and Mr. Wrestling 4 were being interviewed by Marvelous Marc.  4 stated that the USO’s stuck their noses into King Mo’s business and now, the King was going to make them sorry.  King Mo just stood there looking scary.

Uncle Nova was wandering around the back when all of a sudden, Reid Rothchild attacked him.  He bounced Nova off a couple of walls and then tossed him into the buffet table.  Nova battled back and hit Reid with a chair.  As soon as he went down, Nova ran over and grabbed the Elitist title.  He then ran out the door being chased by Reid.  He hopped into a waiting car (was this planned?) and he took off.  Reid was screaming for his title back.

BJ Whitmer and Jeff Hardy had a match against Sandow and Magnus from Prestige Inc.  The match was pretty even and even with Reid making his way down, BJ and Jeff were able to secure the win in 44 minutes after hitting a wrist-clutch exploder suplex on Sandow.  After the match, Reid gets in the ring and calls for Uncle Nova.  He says that Nova is no better than a thief and he wants his property back.  The camera pan to an upper level and there we see Uncle Nova holding the Elitist title amongst the fans.  He laughs and waves at Reid before taking off.

Ravishing Raquel is in the back waiting for Prestige Inc to return and all of a sudden, in walks the Women’s champion Layla El.  “Sweetheart, I’ve heard the things you’ve been saying but all I can tell you is that you just won’t win.  I am too good.” Raquel fires back. “You are the champ because you got lucky.  That is all.  You are nothing more than a smile.  You could wrestle your way out of a paper bag.”  Oh yeah?” Layla answered. You want a taste of what will happen at the PPV?”  “Why, what will that prove?” Raquel asked.  “I’ve done it once already.  The next time I do it, will be for the Women’s title.”  Layla ended up walking away.

The main event of the night is a preview match that will take place at the Clash.  This match has 2 champions and 2 challengers.  One team consists of the champions Daniel Bryan and Jay Lethal taking on their PPV opponents Christopher Daniels and CM Punk.  Punk started off against Bryan.  Bryan hits a missile dropkick and Punk just gives him a serious moment stare.  Lethal gets tagged in.  Punk brings in Daniels for the double team.  Punk locks in a reverse chinlock but gets the Lethal Injection.  Daniels then tosses Jay to the outside for a 9 count.  Both men are still in the ring.  Punk hits an inverted facelock neckbreaker and Daniels hits the Death Valley Driver.  Lethal hits a springboard dropkick on Daniels sending him to the outside.  Punk hits an inverted Frankensteiner and goes for a pin but only gets a 2 count.  Daniels gets tagged in.  Lethal goes for a flying elbow smash and Daniels nails the Angels wings.  Both men are down but Daniels makes the tag first.  Punk comes back in for more double teaming.  Daniels chokes Lethal on the ropes and then Punk locks in the Anaconda Vice.  Daniels chokes Lethal on the ropes again and then Punk dumps him on the outside.  Punk goes out and hits a split legged moonsault on Lethal through a table.  Holy Shit chants are everywhere.  Daniels gets Bryan tied up in the ropes and the ref counts Lethal down and out.  The team of Daniels and Punk get the win.  At the end of the match, Punk goes out and just seriously stares at Lethal.

That is all for now.  The PPV will be up next.  Stay tuned.  Lots to follow.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.04

Welcome back fans.  The Clash of the Champions PPV is just around the corner.  We did get one piece of good news and that is both Donnie B and MW3 have been released from the hospital.  Both were in wheelchairs but appeared to be in good spirits.  We in the HWF and CSWA (except for a few rotten eggs – and you know who you are) wish them a speedy recovery.

Superfans Derek and Joel are at ringside with their collection of signs.

In other news, it appears that Master Bull liked the way “Flyin” Brian and “Marvelous” Marc handled themselves in announce duties so they will be signed to a contract through the end of 2013. They are still on probation though. Master Bull wants them to do at least one more house show before the PPV arrives.  Todays event takes place in Austin, TX.  We are making our way East as we head to Dallas and the Sportatorium.  Brian and Marc make their way to ringside and take their seats.

Brian: Hi everyone and welcome to today’s show.  Our show will have action written all over it so we are excited to get started.

Marc: You are right Brian but before the event can start, we can’t begin without the (now normal) appearance by Master Bull.

Master Bull makes his way out to the top of the stage.  He doesn’t dare go to the ring as he does not want to get pelted with junk.  “Wrestling fans in Austin, we are here to bring you the best wrestling has to offer.  We spared no expense to put on what we feel is an awesome show.  Now, sit back and enjoy the action.”

Master Bull is interrupted as Wade Barrett makes his way out.  “I’m glad you’re here Mr. GM.  I am tired of sitting on the sidelines so I am taking my future in my own hands.  I am heading down to the ring for a match and I want you to send someone down.”  Master Bull looked a bit annoyed.  “Wade, I have the perfect person for you.  In fact, I want to see him in action so here comes your opponent.”

The music hits and out comes MMA sensation King Mo Lawal accompanied by Mr. Wrestling 4.  Both men slap the hands of the fans as they head to ringside. 

King Mo held his own until the USO’s came out.  Mr. Wrestling 4 went over to yell at them and Mo got distracted and Barrett hits a British Surfboard and gets the win.  After the match, King Mo and Mr. Wrestling 4 brawled with the USO’s until Jey and Jimmy took off.  King Mo and Mr. Wrestling stood in the ring celebrating.  Joel was holding up a sign that said “King Mo can’t make my lunch”.  Derek’s said “Mr. Wrestling 4 looks lost”.

Marc: You know Brian, I’m not sure if King Mo is up to this challenge.  I mean, in the octagon, you have one person to concentrate on.  Here, it could be the fans, outside interference or even your tag team partner in some cases.

Brian: You’re right buddy.  And I know exactly what you mean.  Take the team of Fusion Valentine and Spider Violet.  I don’t think they are on the same page. 
Marc:  You got that right.  I for one am interested to see how the match with the Bellas turns out.
Brian: Well buddy, you’re the only one.  HA HA. I’m kidding but you know, those Bellas are H.O.T.
Marc: I don’t know if anyone will disagree with you there.  Oh, our next match is about to begin.

The next match has Kevin Steen taking on Hernandez.  Both men put on a hell of a performance.  The fans were truly entertained in this match.  They were even for practically the entire match.  Unfortunately, the time limit was the “bad guy” here as it brought an end to his fantastic performance.  In the end, Steen hits a moonsault but somehow Hernandez hits a Dominator.  After that, no one was making a cover.  Master Bull came out and said that he definitely wants to see the two of them go at it again. 

Brian: Holy Crap!  That was a fantastic match.  Too bad the time limit ended that one.

Marc: I agree buddy.  That was a real 5 star match.
 
Out next comes the team of the Mexicali Flyers with El Chango and Handsome G.  G has the mic “You know, I don’t believe the Flyers are being given a fair shake.  I think that Master Bull wants to hold them back since they don’t speak English.  Well Mr GM, I am here to ask for a match on their behalf.  If it wasn’t for those damn Law and Order jerks, the Flyers could be walking around with tag team gold.  But, I know we need to prove ourselves so I am asking for a 6 man match against the Shield. We’ll be in the ring waiting.”  They headed to ringside.  Master Bull comes out.  “I may have to agree with you on one thing and is that we could have new champs but I have to disagree about holding anyone back.  I am an equal opportunity employer and I do NOT discriminate.  If you suck, there is nothing that can be done about that.  Shield, this will be a non-title match since it is a 6 man.  Come on out.  The Shield all head to the ring for their match.

The match begins with El Chango and Dean Ambrose.  Ambrose hits a chickenwing facebuster but El Chango tosses him out of the ring for a 6 count.  Ambrose hits another chickenwing facebuster and once again is tossed out of the ring.  Ambrose is frustrated.   Ambrose shoves him down and tries for a pin but El Chango kicks out.  He then hits a flying headscissors and tags out to El Dragon Insano.  Dean tries for a chinlock but the Dragon powers out and nails a DDT.  El Chango is tagged back in.  Dean locks in a chinlock but El Chango hits a monkey flip.  Ambrose is right up and nearly takes off Chango’s head with a clothesline.  Roman Reigns is tagged in but all of the Shield come in.  Ambrose hits the crossface forearms, Rollins hits a gut punch and Reigns nails a spear.  The team leaves as Reigns is standing on Chango’s throat.  Chango locks in a camel clutch but Rollins and Ambrose hit the ring again.  Ambrose hits a chickenwing facebuster, Rollins hits a  huracanrana and Reigns (must have been winded) locks in a simple armbar.  Regins hits some clubbing blows but Chango bounces to the top turnbuckle and hits a shooting star press.  He makes the cover but barely gets a 1 count.  Tornado en Fuego is tagged in as an exhausted El Chango collapses to the mat.  Dragon also hits the ring and they double team Reigns.  Tornado hits a dragonscrew and Dragon hurls Reigns from the ring.  El Chango goes to the top rope and hits a moonsault on Reigns.  The ref makes the count and Reigns is counted out.  The team of the Mexicali Flyers and El Chango get the win.  They celebrate in the ring as the Shield leaves but then out comes Law and Order w/ the Negronomicon.  They threaten to get in the ring but end up cowering away. 

The main event of the night has Brock Lesnar making a rare appearance.  The HWF champion comes to the ring for a non-title match against Bran-Don-Goh.  This also marks a rare appearance of Bran-Don-Goh actually getting in the ring. 

Marc: You know, this Bran-Don-Goh guy has some balls.  I mean, someone of his size and stature trying to stand up to Lesnar.  I mean, does he have a death wish or what?

Brian: I agree buddy.  Unfortunately for Bran-Don-Goh, I think Lesnar’s gonna kill him.

This match ended up going 14 minutes with Lesnar just dominating the challenger (131 to 50).  Lesnar starts off with choking B on the ropes but puts an end to that with a backhand chop.  Lesnar just glares at him.  Uh Oh.    B hits a body avalanche and Lesnar nails a back body drop followed by a powerbomb and then the F-5.  Lesnar tries for a pin but then picks him up by the hair after the 1 count.  Lesnar goes for a powerslam but B hangs on to the ropes.  B goes for a stepover toehold facelock trying for a submission and I think Lesnar is laughing at him.  Lesnar nails a press and slam and goes for the pin but picks up Bran-Don-Goh after 2.  Lesnar hits an F-5, goes for the pin and picks him up again.  Brock hits a powerbomb, goes for the pin and picks him up again.  B hits a backhand chop and gets a powerslam for retaliation.  B hits a backhand chop again and Brock monkey flips him.  B hits a flying calf kick and Brock counters with another 2 powerslams.  He tries for a pin but Bran-Don-Goh KICKS OUT at 2.  Now, he’s got Brock really mad.  Music hits and out comes HHH.  Brock goes right after Hunter and ends up getting counted out.  Bran-Don-Goh gets the win.  This win will qualify him to receive a World title shot.  I wonder if he wants to go through this again.

Stay Tuned as we have more coming.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.03

This newsletter starts off with Prestige Inc in the back talking to Magnus.  There is a bit of arguing going on.  Magnus is accusing King Damian and Reid Rothchild of sabotaging his efforts to win the Intercontinental title.  Reid is pacing calling bullshit while Sandow is trying calm Magnus down.  “Magnus, listen to me.  We are in your corner.  We are not against you.”  “Yeah”, Magnus replied, “If that is true, then why am I not standing here with a title?  There is something seriously wrong here.  You know, maybe I need to prove myself in the ring to you both.  That is unless Reid is willing to give up the Elitist title..?  No, well how about you your Lordship?  Are you willing to give up your title shot and give it to me?  See, that is where the problem lies.  You both want only for yourselves and I get left in the background.  Like I said, maybe I need to prove myself.  I’ll go find myself a tag team partner and then we can have ourselves a match.”  Magnus stormed out.  Reid commented “Let him blow off steam. If he wants this match, let’s give it to him.”  Sounds like we have ourselves a match. 

Magnus was storming around the back and came across a familiar face in the shadows.  He approached and asked this individual if he would be interested in taking on Sandow and Rothchild.  At first he was hesitant, but then he agreed.  Looks like Magnus has his tag team partner. 

Master Bull makes his way out to the ring. “Hello El Paso, TX, the butt end of this god-awful state.  You know, if we were in my hometown of Kansas City, MO, the people would be cheering me and thanking me for bringing entertainment to the city.  Instead, we get you ungrateful, spoiled little children.”  The fans here are just unrelenting.  The Superfans are ringside center and they are the loudest. Joel is holding a sign that says “Why isn’t Del Rio a champ?” Derek has his sign “I came to see hot chicks”. Marc’s sign says “Master Bull = Brilliant”.  Lastly, Brian’s sign says “Good Lord, this place smells”.  Master Bull approached the Superfans and questioned their loyalty to the HWF and CSWA.  All said they were on board.  He then called for security….to escort them to the back….for a tour backstage.  All were excited but Derek seemed a bit skeptical.  Master Bull got back on the mic “These are true fans.  They follow us to each and every show.  The way I repay loyalty, in this case, is to give these fans a backstage pass to see, meet and greet everyone.  Now, the rest of you sit down so we can begin our show.”  He and security accompanied the Superfans to the back.  Derek kept looking around wondering if there was a catch.

While in the back, Marc and Brian teamed up and did kind of a play by play announcing team.  Master Bull heard them and asked if they would want to sign on as announcers?  It would be a short term gig – only through the end of the year.  They would get paid.  Both were ecstatic.  Master Bull said though that they would need a test run and to go out and take over the “Spanish” announce table.  Both went to ringside.

Brian: “Hello everybody, Flyin Brian and Marvelous Marc here at ringside calling the action of the night.  This will be a very interesting evening.”
Marc: “That’s right Brian, we know that Prestige Inc is having a falling out of sorts.  Magnus has found himself a partner and will be taking on Reid and the King later tonight.”
Brian: “You’ve got that right buddy. But now, it looks like the first match of the night is starting.”

Alberto Del Rio is out first followed by Big E Langston.  In a 15 minute butt kicking, Big E was winning until Del Rio though he had enough and took off out of the ring.  He ended up getting counted out so Big E wins this one by DQ.

After the match, Superfans Joel and Derek made their way back to their seats.

Brian: “I can’t believe Del Rio would bail like that.”
Marc: “I can Brian.  Del Rio is a coward and will always take the easy way out.  It looks like our next match is on.”

Out next was Bobby Roode taking on John Cena.  Roode challenged Cena for his spot for the World title (a spot he won after his performance in the last tournament).  Cena killed Roode (114 to 51 points).  Roode did manage to keep kicking out but at the 16 minute mark, Cena hits a knuckle jam and gets the pin.  After the match, Ryback attacks Cena and hits him with a very nasty spear.  Cena folds in half.  Security (they are on top of their game here) comes out and prevents Ryback from doing any more damage.  Ryback spits on Cena before he leaves.

Marc: “That Ryback is a monster.  I wonder if Cena will be able to stop him.”
Brian: “He may have an issue if his pants keep falling down.  Someone get that man a belt.”

Fusion Valentine and Spider Violet make their way to ringside and they are accompanied by Bran-Don-Goh. 

Marc: “These two ladies will be meeting the Bella’s at the PPV but tonight, they will be taking on the team of Velvet Sky and Natalya Neidhart.”

Brian: “Marc, look who is joining us.  It is none other than the Women’s Champion Layla El.  Hello Layla and may I say you look lovely today.”
Marc: “The Women’s champion is here everyone.  Stand up and give her the respect she deserves.”
Layla: “Thank you both.  I came out here because I need address a grave misjustice that happened at the last show.  Raquel did not beat me.  She is a cheater who will stop at nothing to take what is not hers.  Well, I plan on standing in her way and she will not be taking my title.  I can promise you that.”
Brian: “Layla, you could outwrestle most of the guys here let alone the women.  I know you will be victorious”
Layla: “Thanks.  Well, it looks like the match is going to start so on to the action in the ring.”
 
In a 21 minute battle, the team of Nattie and Velvet defeat Spider and Fusion.  In fact, there was some miscommunication going on between Spider and Fusion.  Bran-Don-Goh got in there and calmed the two of them down citing the need for them to work as a team.  Layla El leaves the announce table.

Brian: “Well, this is one match I’m glad is over.  Spider and Fusion have some issues going on.”
Marc: “Well said buddy.  If a team as random as Velvet Sky and Natalya can defeat supposed team specialists that Fusion and Spider are supposed to be then what chance will they have against a real team such as the Bellla’s?”
Brian: “You know Marc, you are right but Brie Bella has yet to win a singles match. In fact, she’s 0-4.  Is she going to hold her sister back?”
Marc: “I guess we have to wait and see.”
 
The final match of the night (the show is being cut off early because Master Bull wants to get the hell out of El Paso) will be Reid Rothchild and King Sandow taking on Magnus and a mystery partner.

Marc: “Brian, this is the last match of the night.  It’s going to be a doozy.”
Brian: “Well said buddy.  It’s our time to shine too.”

The Elitist Reid Rothchild heads to the ring with Ravishing Raquel along with King Damian Sandow.  Magnus then comes out and introduces his tag team partner………Uncle Nova!  Nova and Magnus shake hands and head to the ring.

The match begins with Reid vs Magnus.  Reid immediately hits the Rothchild leg drop.  Magnus gets up and picks up Reid and drops him face first on the top turnbuckle.  Magnus tags out to Uncle Nova.  Nova hits a stomp on Reid and then immediately tags Magnus back in.  Magnus kicks Reid in the midsection and then Reid nails a ReiDDT.  He goes for the pin but Magnus kicks out at 2.  He tags in the King.  Magnus is waiting and hits a spinning Samoan Drop on the King.  Magnus tags Nova back in and he walks right into double teaming from Prestige Inc.  Uncle Nova nails a double axe handle smash to the back of Sandow but Reid hits a Reid Leg drop and Sandow hits a full nelson face smash.  Reid is back in for more double teaming.  Sandow hits a spinning elbow drop and Reid locks in the Rothchild chicken wing.  Reid hits another leg drop as the ref gets Reid out of the ring.  Sandow hits a full nelson face smash and Nova battles back and hits a stomp and then makes the hot tag to Magnus.  Sandow hits Magnus in the gut with his boot and tags Reid back in.  Magnus kicks Reid in the midsection but Reid hits the Rothchild Stunner.  He hits Nova with a forearm smash knocking him off the apron.  He makes the cover on Magnus and gets the 1-2-3.  Sandow grabs Nova and drags him into the ring.  Magnus gets up, looks at Reid and then Sandow and then they all attack Nova.  It was a SWERVE.  The three of them stomp a mudhole (or more like multiple mudholes) in Nova.  They kick him out of the ring and then stand united in the ring.

Marc: “This was an excellent match”

Brian: “Yeah, that noob Uncle Nova didn’t see the swerve coming.”
Marc: “Well, Brian, neither did we.”
Brian: “Yeah, I guess you’re right buddy.  Thanks everyone.”

More info to follow so stay tuned.  The PPV will be shaping up really well in the next week.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.02

Hello fans.  Well, the news just continues as we make our way towards the Clash of the Champions PPV. 

We start off this issue with the second new hire to our team – a gentleman known as Professor Cobra.  Cobra claims to have been trained by the once-great Jake “the Snake” Roberts.  Professor Cobra will be drafted to the HWF.  Master Bull wants to see both of his new hires in action so King Mo and Professor Cobra will be making their in-ring debuts tonight, here in Phoenix, AZ.  Master Bull made the decision that if either or both King Mo and Professor Cobra win their matches tonight, they will be given a spot on the PPV roster.  Speaking of the PPV, the card is shaping up to be a fantastic one with tons of matches.  Since MB does not want to cut any of the matches out, the PPV will take place (like a few others have) over the span of 2 days.   He reached out to the Sportatorium in Dallas, TX to make sure they could pull it off.  They assured him they could so now, we have a 2 day event.

One other thing that was announced was that there would be a new title created – this one though takes us back to the old World Class Championship days – the 6 Man Tag Team Champions.  This is great news for teams like Prestige Inc, the Shield, 3MB, the MF’ers w/ El Chango as well as Law and Order w/ the Negronomicon.  Due to the complexity of the match set up, all of these matches will have a 60 minute time limit – just like tag team matches today have.  There will be matches throughout the rest of the summer to establish the top ranked teams and at the October PPV – “Revenge – Day of Reckoning”, we will have the 6 man tag team champions crowned. 

The evening starts off with Prestige w/ Ravishing Raquel on their way to the ring.  They get in the ring and Reid starts off.  “Our reception here in Phoenix is no better than any other garbage dump we’ve been to.  We try to bring our sense of “upper class” to you lowlifes and you are just no better than the scum I scrape off the bottom of my $500 shoes.”  He then points to where the “superfans” are sitting and points at Derek who is holding a sign that reads “Reid Rothchild makes me hurl.  Wanna see?”  “Even this loser with his ‘funny’ sign just goes to show that most of the fans out there, with the exception of the lovely Ravishing Raquel, are hopeless.” Derek then throws a tomato at Reid and hits him right in the back of the head.  Reid jumps out of the ring and gets in Derek’s face.  Derek is not backing down and looks downright mean (with his cap turned backwards).  He verbally goes toe to toe with Reid and Reid just gets tired and gets back in the ring.  Meanwhile, King Damian Sandow takes the mic “Prestige Inc stands before you the epitome of superiority in the HWF.  We are unparalleled in our excellence and you ungrateful maggots just make it harder for us to want to share anything with you.  Mighty Magnus, at this point, you are the only one of Prestige Inc not involved in the Clash of the Champions PPV.  Reid and I set the bar high and even though we know you are one of us, we really need to know what you plan to do to become a champion.”  Magnus takes the mic “Your Lordship, you are right.  You did tell me early on that to remain as part of this elite group, everyone needs to step up.  So right here and now, I challenge the Intercontinental Champion Jay Lethal to a match for that title.  Lethal, if you are any sort of man, you will accept my challenge and come down here now.”

Jay Lethal’s music hits (Pomp and Circumstance) dressed like a mini-Macho Man.  He comes out with a mic in hand. “Oooohhhhh Yeeeaaaahhhhh!  Black Machismo is here in Phoenix baby!  Magnus, you challenge me for my title?  Well, I accept.  The mini-Macho Man does not back down from any challenge and says let’s do this now.  SNAP in to it!”

Master Bull comes out and says that he will dictate when this will happen and makes it the main event for tonight but for now, they all need to leave except for Ravishing Raquel as she is up next in singles competition.

Ravishing Raquel waits in the ring to see who her challenger will be.  It is none other than the Women’s Champion Layla El.  Layla says that before the PPV, she wants to see what Raquel’s got so she is giving her a non-title match.  The match goes for 12 minutes with the challenger standing toe to toe with the champion.  At the end, Layla makes a mistake and Raquel catches her with a spinning heel kick.  She makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3.  She then picks up the Women’s title and poses on the turnbuckle before Layla gets up and takes it from her.  She then hits Raquel with The Layout and Raquel rolls out of the ring. The champ celebrates with her title as Raquel glares at her.  Raquel takes a mic “Cheap shots from a cheap champion.  I’ve now proven I can pin you and at the Clash, I will do it again.”  She then leaves.

Out next comes King Mo Lawal accompanied by Mr. Wrestling 4.  They wait to see who will be his challenger and out comes Bran-Don-Goh.  He is accompanied by Fusion Valentine and Spider Violet.  In a very even match, the newcomer held his own against the “Dancing with the Stars” reject (as reflected in the sign Derek was holding - the ghetto repaired one).  Bran-Don-Goh was not happy seeing the sign again and Derek and the others were very vocal about B’s “unique” wrestling style.  Bran-Don-Goh starts off with a flying calf kick followed by a leapfrog body guillotine.  King Mo battled back with an elbow smash to B’s face and he followed it up with a waistlock takedown and ride.   B hits another leapfrog guillotine but is stopped in his tracks by a left hand jab from King Mo.  B is down.  Mo locks in a modified klingman anklelock and Bran-Don-Goh has no choice but to tap out.  King Mo wins his first match.

Out next is Professor Cobra for his first match.  His opponent comes out and it is Eric Young.  EY starts off with a whip and ram into the turnbuckle.  He charges and Professor Cobra launches him over the top rope where EY crashes hard on the floor.  Young does not make it back in so Professor Cobra gets his first win via countout.  Professor gets on the mic and says that isn’t the way he wanted to make is debut so he asks Eric Young for a rematch at the PPV.  EY accepts.

It is then announced that King Mo and Mr. Wrestling 4 will square off against the USO’s at the PPV.

The main event is now.  Prestige Inc head to ringside and then are followed out by the Intercontinental Champion Jay Lethal.  Prestige Inc leave the ring so the match can begin.  Magnus starts off by trying to hit a spinning Samoan drop but it is reversed and Lethal nails a flying elbow smash from the ropes.  Magnus battles back by hitting some British stomps.  Magnus is tossed out of the ring.  He goes over to chat with King Sandow and Reid and is back in at the 6 count.  Magnus hits a forearm uppercut and Lethal nails the Lethal Combination for a 2 count.  Magus is then tossed out of the ring again and is back in at 7.  Lethal goes to the top rope for the Flying Elbow but Reid is up and nails Lethal in the back with a chair.  Magnus pulls the champ to the middle of the ring and locks in a Sharpshooter.  Lethal, with no place to go, taps out.  Magnus has just won the title but Jay gets his immediate rematch.

The next match starts off and Lethal is on fire (as well as pissed off).  This one goes 15 minutes and just before the end, Reid tries to hit Lethal with a chair again but Lethal nails a flying dropkick into the chair and into the face of Reid Rothchild.  Magnus charges and Lethal catches him with a hip toss from the top turnbuckle.  He makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3. 

Now, the rubber match is next in a steel cage.  This should nullify Prestige Inc.’s interference in the match.  Magnus starts off with some British stomps.  Lethal battles back with a diving double axe handle smash.  He follows it up with a snap suplex and Magnus kicks him in the midsection.  Lethal nails a superkick but Magnus hits a Spinning Samoan Drop and gets a 2 count.  Magnus kicks him in the midsection.  Sandow and Reid are on the outside of the ring attaching what looks like jumper cables to the ring.  They motion for Magnus to toss Lethal into the cage but Lethal reverses it and catapults Magnus into the cage where he receives a pretty bad shock.  Magnus falls backwards and Lethal makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3.  Now, he has to get out of the cage.  Sandow and Reid are blocking the door so Lethal climbs to the top of the cage and JUMPS!  He hits both men with a flying body press taking them out.  Lethal is the winner of the match and retains his IC title.  Holy Cow!

 

Thanks for reading.  More to come so stay tuned.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 08.01

Hello fans and welcome to the first newsletter in the month of August.  August promises to be filled to the brim with new hires, a PPV, wrestling, and of course (we couldn’t do without) DRAMA. 

The first day in the month of August introduces a new performer from south of the Border.  His name is El Chango.  We received a taped interview from our new hire and this is what he had to say (unlike the Mexicali Flyers, this one speaks English – Master Bull made sure of that):

“My name is El Chango. For the uneducated, Chango is Spanish for monkey, and after you see me fight you will understand why.  I hail from the small town of Juarez in Mexico.  Do not let my small size fool you, I have taken down many a large opponent as I grew up in this very rough town.
There is no one specific wrestler I have a beef with; primarily because I have a beef with everyone.  I have few friends; my only goal is to rise to the top and be the best fighter in the world.  At times I may pretend to be someone’s friend, but most likely I will stab them in the back if they turn away from me.

Crowds love me because I’m mean. Even when they cheer for me, I still usually flip them off because I pretty much hate all people. If I was not such a good fighter they would probably not cheer for me.  Due to my smaller size, aerial attacks are my specialty. Though, in a pinch I CAN use a wrestling hold.

Gracias.
Yours truly,
El Chango”

We look forward to seeing this unique individual in the ring.

With the addition of El Chango to our fold, he will be drafted to CSWA also and (we were just informed) that he too will be managed by Handsome G and will team (willingly or reluctantly) with the Mexicali Flyers.  The MF’ers vs Law and Order will now be a 6 man tag team match with El Chango siding with the MF’ers and Negronomicon will team with Law and Order.

Also of note, in case it hasn’t been announced yet (can’t remember) by the high and mighty Master Bull, King Mo Lawal, MMA champion, was signed to a part time contract and will be drafted to the CSWA.  He will come in and is expected to be teamed with Mr. Wrestling 4.  Apparently, they have a friendship dating back years and so 4 asked for this and was reluctantly granted.

As we pan ringside, we see Superfans Derek, Marc, and Brian joined by the 4th member of their clique Joel.  Joel proudly shows off the signs he has. “Big Show + ODB = OMG”, “The Axe is pretty dull”, “King Damian Sandow is the ruler of the world” and “Bring on the Gobbledy Gooker”.  A visiting Jim Ross was backstage and referred to them as “Rat Bastards”.  I think that will be a name that will stick.

On to some matches. 

The first match had Mark Henry getting the win over Mike Bennett after Bennett got rammed into the ring post and Henry rolled him up for the win.

Ted Dibiasi Jr gets a win over Wade Barrett in 4 minutes after Barrett falls asleep and doesn’t respond to the Million Dollar Dream.

In a 21 minute battle, Kurt Angle got a win over Curtis Axel after Axel (who had been dumped to the outside 4x in this match) walked out thereby giving Angle the win via count out.

David Otunga and Ezekiel Jackson went to a 30 minute draw.

Great Khali gets a count out win over Mankind after Casey Jones got involved – sort of.  Khali and Mankind were both on the outside of the ring when Casey popped out from under the ring and handcuffed Mankind to the steel steps.  Khali made it back in just before the 10 count. After the match, Casey started to wallop Mankind with his hockey stick but Mankind hit Casey in the face with the steel steps.  The handcuffs broke and Mankind then hit Casey with the Mandible Claw.  Casey was fading but somehow pulled out brass knuckles and hit Mankind.  He then took off.

We have a break and then out comes Handsome G with the Mexicali Flyers.  G goes on to say that the Flyers would have been tag team champions if Law and Order had not interfered in their match.  He then announces the third man in his stable – El Chango who comes out to a mixed reaction from the fans (due to his mixed message in his vignette).  Handsome G says that these 3 Mexican superstars will bring law and order by eliminating Law and Order and that scrub Negronomicon.  They are then interrupted by Law and Order.  Marshall William Pearl is out with Cowboy Shizzle.  They say that they will be ready to send these three homies back to where they came from – under some rock in the middle of nowhere.  Out then comes Negronomicon and he looks different.  We can’t put our finger on it but something is definitely different about him.  Pearl says that it is time to show these chumps who runs the show around here.  The MF’ers head to ringside for their match.
The Mexicali Flyers (w/ Handsome G and El Chango) went toe to toe with Law and Order (who had Negronomicon at ringside).  This is a short one with Law and Order getting the win via countout.  Negronomicon got involved and hit Tornado en Fuego with a chair.  El Chango then attacked Negronomicon while the Flyers took out the Cowboy and Marshall.  Handsome G got in the ring with his guys and they celebrated.

Next up has Sin Cara squaring off against Santino Marella.  After a 19 minute battle, Sin Cara gets the win after hitting multiple arm drags and Santino could not retain his balance.

Mr. Wrestling 4 then comes out for his match against Zack Ryder.  At the 11 minute mark, 4 catches Zack with the “original Mr. Wrestling kneelift” and gets the 1-2-3.  The lights go out again and come back on seconds later and the man in black (not from the Princess Bride) is standing in the ring with a chair – but so is Mr. Wrestling 4.  4 is yelling at him to do something but he ends up backing down and leaving.

We just received an update about Donnie B and MW3.  Well, it turns out that their injuries are worse than expected.  It seems that the years of wear and tear on their bodies could be too much to handle.  Both men are conscious but have been told by their doctors that it may be likely they will never set foot in the ring again.  The doctor tried to explain that they may not have a choice.  Donnie B and MW3 getting back in the ring may result in them not getting out of the ring.  They have a choice to make.

The main event tonight has Dolph Ziggler taking on Sheamus.  Both former WWE champions had a solid match but the pale Celtic Warrior kept overpowering his opponent.  At the 19 minute mark, both men were brawling on the outside of the ring.  Sheamus hits a white noise piledriver and then makes it back in before the 10 count.  Dolph gets counted out and Sheamus adds a win to his record.

Thanks for reading.  Stay tuned; much more to follow.

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2013 07.08

Hello fans.  Welcome back to our newsletter.  We are actually reporting live from Tucson, AZ.  As the show begins, Superfans Derek and Marc are joined by the 3^rd member Brian.  All three brought their signs.  Derek and Marc had the ones from previous shows (Derek actually retaped the one Bran-Don-Goh tore up – looks pretty ghetto) and Brian had some of his own:  “What the hell is a Shizzle?” “Great Khali is Mankind’s illegitimate child” and “John Cena needs to pull his pants up.”

This show is action packed with HWF matches as the wrestlers vie for the upcoming invitational battle royal.

Master Bull begins with his appearance. “Finally!  The HWF and CSWA are here in Tucson, AZ!  And what a cesspool it is (boos emanate from the crowd).  Why can’t you be more like my hometown of Kansas City, MO?  Really people?  Come on.  Get off your fat asses and do something.  You’re like zombies out there.”  People began throwing things at him so he bolted to the top of the ramp for his own safety.  “And I’d say you are pretty ignorant too.  You are all lucky the city of Tucson wanted us here.”  He then left so the matches could begin.

There was a small issue with the last match lineup for the PPV. 

In our first match, Tyson Kidd takes on Zema Ion.    The match saw lots of high spots but in the end, at 11 minutes, Tyson Kidd gets the win with the Code Blue.  Both men shake hands afterwards.

Next out is Brodus Clay taking on Antonio Cesaro.  Slow count Sam is the ref in this one.  This match was controlled by Cesaro but no matter what he did, he could not keep Clay down for the 3 count.  He tried 6 times but Clay just kept kicking out.  Just before the 30 minute bell, Cesaro hits a phenomenal gut wrench suplex.  He made the cover but the time limit bell rang before Sam’s hand went down for the 3^rd time.  A very frustrated Cesaro got into Sam’s face and threatened him.  Clay grabs Antonio and nails a T-Bone Suplex and Antonio rolls out of the ring.  Brodus got Sam to do a bit of dancing before they both left.

Out next is Jack Swagger taking on Kofi Kingston.  We haven’t seen much of these two as of late so we’re glad they are getting a match in.  Swagger controlled the match but just like in the last one, he could not do enough to keep Kofi down.  This match also went to the 30 minute time limit.

Next on the card is Heath Slater (w/3MB) against Roderick Strong.  Dispite having 3MB at ringside, Strong was able to hold his own.  This one goes 21 minutes and after Drew McIntyre accidentally kicks Slater, Strong hits a forearm to the back of Slater and gets the 1-2-3.

We have a break and out comes Prestige Inc with Ravishing Raquel.  They are not on the card tonight so they must be out here flapping their gums.  They make their way to the ring.  Magnus begins “We are Prestige Inc and the way we are treated is horrendous.  I can’t believe you maggots don’t see talent when it is right in front of you.”  King Damian Sandow takes the mic “Mighty Magnus, I can believe it.  These people here in Tucson (very cheap pop) are all bottom feeders.  We should not expect any different.  I am out here to promise that I will beat that chump Medley bring the European title here to the HWF were we will bring back Prestige to the title.”  He hands the mic to Ravishing Raquel. “Layla, I hope you are ready.  I am going to stop at nothing to take that title off of you.  As a member of Prestige Inc, it is expect that we ALL are champions and I will join that club with my man Reid at my side.”  “Well said Raquel”, Reid answered.  “You are already a champion in my eyes but I can tell you that the perks, benefits and notoriety will skyrocket once you come home with that title.  Now, on to my business.  Uncle Nova.  You pain in the ass.  You have the gall to think that you will ever be at my level – never mind a champion.  We will meet and I will send you packing.  Maybe our illustrious GM Master Bullshit will get off his ass and ‘redo’ your character again. Hell, you’ve been, what, 4 characters now?  A little complex issue?”  While this is going on, Uncle Nova in coming in through the crowd.  Unbeknownst to Prestige Inc, he gets into the ring with a steel chair.  Magnus and Sandow taste steel first as Reid gets Raquel out of the ring.  He then too tastes the cold hard steel (actually aluminum).  Uncle Nova picks up the Elitist title and celebrates in the ring.  Security comes out and Nova takes off through the crowd with the Elitist title.

We are back to action with Kazarian taking on Tensai.  For about 13 minutes, Kaz controlled the tempo of the match.  After that, though, it was Tensai.  He turned the pace of the match into his favor after almost getting a pin after locking in a claw hold STO.  From there, he hit everything from a flying elbow smash to a running senton splash.  The end came after Kaz went to the ropes and so did Tensai and Tensai hit him like a freight train.  Kaz got hit so hard that he bounced off the ropes and crashed in the middle of the ring. Tensai gets the win at the 19 minute mark.

Our second to last match is Alberto Del Rio taking on Mr. Ken Anderson.  This was the shortest match of the night.  As soon as the bell rang, Alberto locks in a rolling cross armbreaker.  Anderson, fearing his arm would get broken, tapped out immediately.  This one didn’t even go 30 seconds.  Crazy.

The main event has CM Punk taking on Jeff Hardy.   This one went 22 minutes with both men hitting crazy stuff but in the end, Hardy nails a suicide dive on Punk and is able to get the 1-2-3.

 

Clash of the Champions card as of right now:

John Cena vs Ryback in a Double Hell in the Cell

Mexicali Flyers vs Law and Order
Reid Rothchild vs Uncle Nova in a specialty match
Spider Violet and Fusion Valentine vs The Bella twins
Super Warrior vs Bran-Don-Goh
 
CSWA
Casey Jones vs Dean Ambrose for the Internet Media title
King Damian Sandow vs. Mike “the Axe” Medley for the European title.  If Sandow wins, the European title moves to HWF.
AJ Styles vs Mankind for the US title.
Christian vs AJ Styles for the CSWA World title

HWF

The Miz vs ODB for the X-Division title
Jay Lethal vs CM Punk for the IC title
Daniel Bryan vs Christopher Daniels for the North American title
Brock Lesnar vs HHH for the HWF World title

Ravishing Raquel vs Layla El for the Women’s title

The Shield vs BJ Whitmer/Jeff Hardy for the World tag team titles
HWF top 8 battle royal to determine who gets the future title shot.
HWF World champion vs CSWA World champion for a title shot against the Undisputed Champion
Undisputed Heavyweight Champion vs ????
 
 
More to follow as the Clash of the Champions PPV gets closer.  Stay tuned.