Hello
fans and welcome back to our newsletter.
It looks like GM Max McGillicutty has been keeping himself busy
continuing to scout for new talent. He
shows a vignette of two new hires – Otto Ruthless and Mason the Mangler. They will be debuting tonight in a match
against the Tag Team Champions – Pete the PUN-isher and Magnum Kone. Just so the roster doesn’t get all riled up,
it is a non-title match.
Backstage,
Steel Curtain member Starbuck Steel meets with GM Max McGillicutty. Starbuck shows that they had a win before
losing the belts which should have granted them an immediate rematch. Max comments that the Curtain couldn’t even
beat the Desperados. “Yeah, and what was
up with that time limit? Tag teams are
supposed to get 30, not 20 minutes”. Max
says time was running out and they had to make a cut somewhere. Starbuck asks for a singles match tonight and
Max immediately grants it against Adam Jameson.
He says that match is up first.
Match
#1 begins with Adam Jameson making his way to the ring. He gets a decent pop from the crowd. Next, Starbuck Steel makes his way out (minus
his partner Buzz) and gets a mixed reaction as the Steel Curtain’s attitude is
undergoing some changes. Starbuck has
control for most of the match late on he noticed that the time limit was
nearing. He nailed AJ with the Buck-U
and went for the count. The ref counted
1…2…and then the bell rang. Buck looked
up at the clock and it was only at 19 minutes.
The bell was rung early. WHAT THE
HELL!!!! The ref looked confused too and
the timekeeper said he was told that the clock was a minute slow and that they
indeed hit the time limit. After a bit
of arguing, the ref actually got the match restarted. Buck instantly nailed AJ with the Buck-U
again, made the cover and got the 3 count.
Starbuck Steel gets a win but he is not happy about what is going
on. He storms off to the back not even
acknowledging the fans. (19 min)
We
cut to a taped promo from King CJ:
“The
hashtag couldn’t be happier with how 2016 ended (former World Champ, crowned
King) and what better way to kick off 2017 than with all the stars the HCW has
to offer....the king demands, for his first match against the Masked Gentleman,
a court and what better way to do it than a good old fashion slobber knocking lumberjack
strap match!!! Thats right…me...you…strapped together and nowhere to run
because ALL of the HCW stars will be surrounding the ring ensuring no one runs
out the ring without an ass whooping....show up…if you’ve got the
balls….Hashtag OUT!” (drops the mic)
Next
up is our tag match. First, Otto
Ruthless and Mason the Mangler make their way out to the ring to a mixed
reaction from the fans. For Mason, they
were playing creepy music. Next, the
Ambassador leads out the Tag Team Champions Pete the PUN-isher and Magnum
Kone. Pete is running around to the fans
asking them puns but doesn’t stick around to give the answers. Magnum rolls his eyes and he makes his way to
the ring. Pete jumps in saying he wants
to start off but as soon as Mason the Mangler enters, he bolts and tags in
Magnum. Magnum would clean house and
then Pete would tag himself in. Once
Pete started to get beat down, he would tag out. This went on for 29 minutes. Finally, Magnum got tired of it and just as
Pete was setting up the PUN-ctuation, Magnum tagged himself in and nailed Otto
with the Choco Taco (backbreaker).
Magnum made the cover and got the 1-2-3.
The champs win this one but it was for sure not an easy win. Pete tried to complain to the Ambassador but
as Magnum exited the ring, he threw Pete’s belt at him almost hitting him in
the face. Magnum smiled as he walked
off. Pete and the Ambassador followed. (29 min)
We cut
backstage and are treated to (yet) another vignette from the Hardcore champion
the Masked Gentleman.
*Miss Samantha
comes in with a lit cigar and blows smoke to the camera that it clouds up the
camera and Bam! In pops the Masked Gentleman,
MG looks left and looks right, and then admires Miss Samantha. "So I believe
I woke up the Queen it seems. Well, lucky me...well I guess its lucky me. See
King CJ I have been watching you as of late. Am I Impressed? Not Really, you see all I seen is your mouth
rattle, like a baby rattle...talk talk talk. Now You got a big mouth, and
that's fine, I can sling the shit just as well as you. now sit down on your
throne...flush it first please by all means, because you raised the ire of the
HCW Hardcore Champion. I never turn down a fight, and your little challenge?
Pfft, I was born for that crap. So #TrashBag CJ, I have no worries about taking
you through the hell you seem to expect to take me through. Match 1 is a
lumberjack Strap match? No worries, any chance to use a weapon on your hapless
soul is fine with me, so do I get to pick Match 2? If so I think that after you
Think you will have your fun with the other HCW Morons around the ring, I think
then WHEN I beat you in the First Match, that I will share the ring with you in
my Favorite enclosure....a STEEL CAGE!!! Then IF there happens to be a Match 3,
or third fall, then WHATEVER Bumbling Idiot Max decides, I don't Care.....Miss
Samantha will be by my side in whatever I decide. King I'm gonna crown you, and
i am sure you heard all the "Royal" Lines, but this much is true, The
#BlackNBlue Hashtag will be worn out on YOU!" *Miss Samantha blows smoke
into the camera again as MG disappears and Miss Samantha walks out of the
screen shot*
It’s
time for some action from the Women’s side.
Queen’s Court member Lady Hermann comes out first and is pretty heavily
booed. Her opponent Southern Belle comes
out next and even though she’s not been the nicest to the fans, they like her
more than her Ladyship. As the match
began, Starr Vixen made her way out and that totally put Lady Hermann off her
game. Belle capitalized and controlled
the entire match. After Lady Hermann
(illegally) choked Belle in the corner, that got Starr up and moving. She had words with Lady Hermann who almost
exited the ring to go after her. Giving
Belle enough time to recover, Starr backed off and sat back down. Lady Hermann grimaced at her evilly but as
soon as she turned around, Belle nailed her with a vicious uppercut. Belle immediately went for the cover. Starr snuck over and held down Lady Hermann’s
foot so she couldn’t kick out. Belle
gets the 3 count and wins the match.
Starr Vixen leaves the ring as the fans pop for her (not so much for
Belle). (15 min)
Max walks over and (reluctantly) knocks on MG’s dressing room door
and Miss Samantha answers. She’s not
wearing a whole lot. Max, speechless for
a moment, tells her to let MG know he has a match tonight. She reminds Max he already defended his title
(and claimed to be doing that right now) but Max says it’s not for the Hardcore
title but is actually for the World Title.
Her eyes light up and she slams the door in Max’s face. You can hear her tell MG the news and a lot
of whooping and hollering followed. Max
shuddered and then left.
We
head back to the ring for tag team action.
First, MJ comes out and leads the Smashers to the ring. They are booed. Next, Ant Graham (haven’t heard from him
since he tried to rig the Manager of the Year results) leads 5th
Column members (and co-holders of the 6 Man trophy) Oswald Zimmerman & Karl
Braun to the ring. The Smashers have
challenged the 5th Column for their placement in the Tag team top
10. Right off the bat, Ant Graham and MJ
had words and were actually separated by their respective teams. The fans do not like either team. The Smashers were tearing into the 6 man
champs and it just wasn’t pretty. On the
outside of the ring, MG and Ant Graham got into it again. This time the ref got involved and separated
the two but MJ, still pissed, swung at Ant but missed and nailed the ref. The ref immediately disqualified the Smashers
(who were wondering what the hell just happened) and awarded the match to Ant
Graham and the 5th Column.
MJ followed his team to the back trying to explain what just went
down. (18 min)
Backstage,
World Champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine says
tonight he gets to take on (presumably) the toughest man in the HCW – the
Masked Gentleman. Drew says that he
didn’t become the World Champion by taking on lightweights. He says tonight, he may be in for a tough
challenge but he will retain.
We go back to the ring for our next match with more new hires that
Max picked up. First, new guy Talon
McFrost comes out and the fans boo him as he is flipping them off. Next, his opponent Bishop Ripley heads down
to the ring and he gets a better reception.
He high fives with the fans before entering the ring. Talon attacks him and this one is underway. The match was extremely technical and only
one pin attempt was…well…attempted during this match. Both men fought hard and when the bell rang
bringing this one to its conclusion…a draw, both men ended up shaking hands in
a show of respect and then left. (20 min
draw)
Backstage, our illustrious GM Max McGillicutty had an announcement
for the entire HCW Roster: “Some people
think they’re entitled; others feel like they own the show. This is for each and every member on this
roster. If you feel you’re entitled to
something, guess what…you’re not. Those
who want to take matters into their own hands…if I do not feel it is best for
business, guess what…there’s the door.
Go find another place to work. I
am responsible for HCW. I do what is
best for business. I’m sick and tired of
people thinking, because they have temporary possession of a title that they
rule the roost. I will make one thing
perfectly clear…I am in charge. Want to
challenge my authority? You’ll
lose. Even with this “new found
attitude”, the owners have my back. You
will not. I’m not saying this is a
dictatorship but the next person or team who feels the need to usurp my
authority will find themselves on the unemployment line.” Wow.
Max is really putting his foot down.
It’s time for the Main Event.
The Hardcore Champion the Masked Gentleman w/ Miss Samantha makes his
way down to the ring. The fans throw all
kinds of stuff at him but he doesn’t care.
He showboats on the turnbuckles while Miss Samantha parades around the
ring with his Hardcore title. The music
changes and the fans POP as the World Champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine
makes his way down. The fans are behind
him 100% and that raises the ire of MG.
Drew climbs the turnbuckles and holds his title high all the while
keeping an eye on MG. Drew went on the
offensive before MG could attack him and he controlled the tempo of the
match. MG tried to get a break and he
tossed Drew out of the ring but was back in after a 2 count. After more back and forth, Drew hit MG with
the La Casita but MG hurled Drew out of the ring again and tried to get his
wind back. Drew nailed a Lover Bomb but
MG was too close to the ropes. MG would
battle back and nail a superplex. He
would go for the pin but Drew kicked out.
Drew hit the La Casita again and went for a pin but MG kicked out. As Drew was rolling over, Miss Samantha
rushed over and eye gouged Drew blinding him.
MG hit a piledriver and a powerslam.
MG called for another piledriver but Drew nullified it. MG nailed a powerslam and then dumped Drew
out of the ring. Drew barely got back in
before the 10 count. MG nailed a lariat
and then began showboating. All of a
sudden, King CJ came out and threatened to get in the ring. MG began jaw jacking with him. He then turned around and Drew hit him with
the Lover Bomb. The ref counted
1…2…3! Drew the Canadian Love Machine is
victorious and retains his title. MG
gets up and shoulderblocks Drew out of the ring. While he is jawjacking with King CJ, he
begins to do the ‘Hogan’ pose. All of a
sudden, the Super Shockmaster runs in from the crowd and with a (take a) ticket
dispenser and blasts MG with it knocking him out. Super Shockmaster stands over MG laughing and
is pulling all the numbers out of the dispenser and dropping them on MG. Miss Samantha is yelling for someone to stop
this and King CJ approaches her. He
begins to flirt with her and she slaps him across the face. King CJ just smiles (in a very creepy way) as
the show comes to an end.
Be sure to turn in to our next show. Once MG shakes off the cobwebs, I’m sure he
will have responses for both King CJ and the Super Shockmaster.
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