Hello
fans and welcome back to our newsletter.
Today’s issue, we are proud to say, is #CJ free as he is off hiding from
Big Show (at least we are assuming that).
The
show begins in the back where GM’s Master Bull and Hulk Hogan are having
discussions about the hiring of new talent to expand the roster. Hogan says he’s adding to the Women’s
division with the debut of two new superstars tonight. Bull, not to be shown up, says he’s just
hired a new talent and he will debut on the next show.
The
show starts off with the two new women that Hogan has hired. Their names are Sasha Banks and Charlotte
Flair (the daughter of the Nature Boy Ric Flair). The two head to the ring and receive a nice
welcome from the audience. The two had a
pretty even match with Charlotte having the edge in this one but Sasha catches
Charlotte with the Bankrupt Neckbreaker Slam and is able to get the 1-2-3. After the match, Cactus Jackie comes out and
complains about newbies stealing her in ring time. She gets into the faces of both Sasha and
Charlotte and starts to push them around.
Sasha hits Jackie with a roundhouse kick and Charlotte locks her in the
move her father made famous…the Figure Four.
The crowd pops huge when she does this but Jackie is able to get out of
the move pretty quick and bolts off towards the back limping. Flair and Banks shake hands in the ring and
then leave.
In
the back, Diva’s Champion Southern Belle says she’s in a giving mood tonight
and will defend her title against Brie Bella.
Belle says her new tag team partner Velvet Sky will be accompanying her
to ringside just in case Nikki Bella decides to stick her big ol’ nose in.
Next
on the card is Alberto el Patron challenging Dean Ambrose for his spot for the
US title held by Christopher Daniels.
Daniels comes out and sits at commentary. Ambrose was controlling the first part of the
match but constant distractions from Daniels put him off his game. Alberto ends up hitting Dean with a double
arm facebreaker and in 19 minutes, gets the win. Alberto immediately issues a challenge to
Daniels for his title shot next week.
Daniels gets in the ring and nails Alberto with a dropkick sending him
flying out of the ring. He then turns
around and Ambrose hits him with the Dirty Deeds. Ambrose wipes his hands and then leaves the
ring.
In
the back, Cactus Jackie attacks Charlotte and beats her down. She locks her in the cactus stretch and
finally releases the hold after a bunch of shirts run over to break it up.
We
head back to the ring for our next match which has the Usos taking on the newly
formed team of Abyss and Adam Rose. Both
teams went toe to toe for 19 ½ minutes until Abyss got counted out. Jey eliminated Adam Rose and Jimmy took Abyss
out of the ring and hit a Samoan drop on the ringside barrier. Abyss was not able to recover fast enough to
make it back in the ring and got counted out.
The Usos get another win in the tag team rankings.
In
the back, Kevin Owens says that he gets Samoa Joe in the ring tonight and will
show him why he is the future of this sport.
We
head back to the ring for our next match which is Southern Belle vs. Brie Bella
for the Diva’s Championship. Brie, the
challenger, comes out first with her sister Nikki. Next, the champion Southern Belle comes out
with her tag team partner Velvet Sky.
Belle schooled the Bella Twin and showed her the meaning of kick ass. Nikki and Velvet did not interfere and let
these two battle it out. In 14 minutes,
after hitting Brie with an eye rake, she rolled her up and got the 1-2-3. Southern Belle retains her title. Velvet gets in the ring and the two celebrate
while the Bella’s head to the back.
In
the back, Master Bull and Hulk Hogan are talking about the main event for the
evening. Hogan wants it to be CSWA World
Champion Austin Aries and Master Bull wants it to be The Ascension. The two of them bicker until MJ and the Tag
Team Champions the Ascension interrupt them.
They ask why there is any question on who the main event should be
centered around. MJ says that they are
the only reason fans are coming out.
Both Bull and Hogan take offense and tell them that they just lost their
main event spot. Their match is coming
up soon so the better get ready. MJ and
the Ascension storm out.
The
Fiend is back in singles action tonight taking on newcomer Leon Teremoto. The Fiend looks really good in this match and
schools the new guy. This one goes 18
minutes but the Fiend is able to nail the 3 hits from Hell and hook the leg for
the 1-2-3. The Fiend wins the match but
that win is short lived as the Miz runs down and attacks him and hits him with
the Mizard of Oz. Miz showboats in the
ring before stomping on the Fiend a couple of times and then leaves.
In
the back, CSWA World Champion Austin Aries says he’s defending the title
tonight against his biggest challenge to date…World’s Strongest Man Mark
Henry. Aries is confident that he will
be walking out as the champion tonight.
Samoa
Joe vs Kevin Owens is up next. Joe comes
out first and then Owens comes out and attacks him. The two brawl until Shield member Ryback runs
down to join the fray. Ryback blasts
Owens and then Joe hurls him out of the ring.
Suits come down and take Ryback to the back…kicking and screaming all
the way. Back in the ring, Owens
recovers enough to go after Joe again.
This one is a really close battle that sees both men stand toe to toe
with each other. Just past the 10 minute
mark, Ryback runs back down and attacks Joe resulting in a DQ. Samoa Joe and Ryback brawl to the back. Owens is still in the ring pissed off.
Kevin
Owens storms the back into the dressing room of the Shield. Owens hollers at Ryback for causing him to
lose. Seth Rollins stands up and tells
Owens to back off before he gets hurt.
Dean Ambrose is sitting in the corner reading a magazine. While all this is going on, Samoa Joe just
so happens to be walking by and hears all this.
Owens is not backing down from the Shield and Joe seems impressed. He walks away just before Owens leaves the
dressing room. “I’ll take you both on”
Owens yells as he leaves the room. He
then storms off.
Our
next title match is up next. First, out
comes the challengers Solomon Crowe and Kalisto. MJ then makes an appearance and introduces us
all to the World Tag Team Champions – The Ascension – Konnor and Viktor. The champs strut down to the ring wearing
mock Road Warrior gear. The bell rings
and the match begins. After the 4th
minute of the match, the challengers up and failed. The champs beat the holy hell out of them and
took their time with it. The champs
controlled the rest of the match and after hitting the Fall of Man on Crowe on
the outside of the ring, he gets counted out at the 25 ½ minute mark. As the champs stand victorious in the ring,
the Desperados – The Stache and El Chango – make their way out. El Chango gets on the mic and says that they
are officially challenging the champions for the titles at the Great American
Bash. The Ascension say they will accept
and the Desperados will taste defeat (although it sounded like ‘the feet’ –
gross).
CSWA
GM Hulk Hogan comes out and says that certain people need to start earning the
paycheck they are receiving and says tonight’s main event will have a special
guest referee - the Caped Crusader. CC makes his way out in his Batman disguise
with a ref’s shirt covering his outfit.
The challenger Mark Henry makes his way out and gets in the ring. The CSWA World Champion Austin ‘the Man’
Aries makes his way out and heads to the ring.
This match is a best of 3 falls match.
In the first 22 minutes, Henry gets the first fall after hitting the
World’s Strongest Slam. The second fall
goes to Aries after he hit Mark with a slingshot corkscrew press in 14
minutes. The final fall goes 11
minutes. Randy Orton runs down and as he
goes to attack Austin Aries, the champ moves and Orton ends up nailing Henry
instead. Aries hits another slingshot
corkscrew press and gets the win. After
the match, Mark Henry ends up hitting Randy Orton with the World’s Strongest
Slam before he walks away.
With
that, the show comes to an end. Stay
tuned for more action.
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