Hello
fans and welcome back to our newsletter.
The first issue of July starts off with a BANG! GM Hulk Hogan comes out with owners Mr.
Bychowski & Mr. Meyers. The owners
let the GM take the mic. “Welcome to the
HWF and CSWA brother. The Hulkster,
alongside the owners, has a major announcement to make. The HWF will be hiring a new GM…and he will
be here tonight. Hogan pauses as “IF YOU
SMELLLLLLLLLLL....What the ROCK is COOKIN.”
Hogan looks to the owners who look perplexed. Out walks…#CJ. The fans who were cheering did a 180 and
booed the CRAP out of #CJ. He is
standing there laughing. He has a mic.
“All
of you dopes…#CJ should be the GM as I am the only one who knows what truly is best
for business. But I digress. Once again, the #PC is NOT on the card. Old Man Hogan…what’s the deal? You’re keeping me down because you don’t want
me showing everyone up. Fat Man Meyers
and Donnie Flabby B, you two are no better.
#CJ is the #PC and you better realize before I make your lives a living
hell…” Hogan walks over and yanks the
mic from #CJ. “Just who do you think
you are, brother, coming out and interrupting us like this? You want to see action tonight? Guess what…curtain jerking (refers to the
first match of the card) it is for you BROTHER.
Get your ASS out of here and get yourself ready. You’ve got a HUGE challenge ahead of
yourself.” #CJ looks worried and then
heads to the back.
“Now
that that fool is dealt with, The Hulkster wants to introduce you to the NEW GM
for the HWF.” New music hits and out
comes an unfamiliar face. He gets a
decent reaction. “Fans of the HWF, my
name is Max McGillicutty. I’ve been
hired to replace Master Bull as GM for the HWF.
I can guarantee you, like my predecessor, I won’t take bull crap from
anyone and I will make sure that what transpires under my watch will be what is
best for business.” He gets a small reaction;
mostly positive. He shakes hands with
the owners and Hulk Hogan and they all leave the stage.
The
first match of the card is #CJ taking on a mystery opponent. #CJ is pacing in the ring until out comes…Roman
Reigns. Reigns, the X-Division champion,
comes out but his title is not on the line tonight much to the dismay of
#CJ. 5 minutes into the match, the
Hardcore Champion Magnum Kone comes out to hand out ice cream to the kids at
ringside. #CJ takes offense and yells at
him. Reigns then nails #CJ with the
Moment of Silence and scores the win.
#CJ yelled at Magnum as he sulked to the back. (6 min)
GM
Max McGillicutty comes out and says that he has hired a brand new team who will
be debuting tonight. He introduces the
team called ‘The Steel Curtain’ and they are Buzz Steel and Starbuck
Steel. They come out to a decent pop and
shake hands with the fans. Max says that
the Steel Curtain has their work cut out for them in their debut match. Out comes Konnor and Viktor – The
Ascension. They are accompanied by their
manager MJ. MJ says that the Ascension
will make examples of these newbies and will work on getting their titles
back. The Ascension looked very
aggressive and put on a great show but the Steel Curtain wouldn’t lay
down. At the 25 minute mark, the World
Tag Team Champions the Desperados come out and that causes a distraction for
Konnor and Viktor. As they are hollering
at the champs, Buzz Steel nails Viktor with the Buzzkill (an insuguri) and gets
the 1-2-3. The Steel Curtain are victorious
in their first match. The Ascension are
pissed off and the Desperados walk away laughing. (26 min)
In
the back, the Band – Dirk Devon and the Axe – say they are getting their title
match tonight and they will take the belts from champs. Axe warns the Ascension to stay out of their
business.
Kane
makes his way down to the ring. He calls
out Sting and says he is challenging him for his spot in the lineup for the
Intercontinental title held by Brock Lesnar.
The Scorpion Warrior comes out and accepts the challenge. Kane was surprisingly taking the match to
Sting and things got worse for the Scorpion Warrior when IC champion Brock
Lesnar came out. He went to sit at
ringside commentary. Part way through
the match, Sting hops out of the ring and gets in Brock’s face. As Kane distracts the ref, Lesnar blasts
Sting with the F-5. He then leaves.
Sting ends up getting counted out. Kane
gets the win via CO and moves up in the rankings while Sting moves down. (10 ½
min)
Kurt
Angle is being interviewed and says that in his next match, he will make the
Caped Crusader bleed. The new GM Max
McGillicutty overhears this and says that he is adding a stipulation to their
match and that will be First Blood rules (the first person to bleed loses).
The
next match on the card is #3 in our best of 7 between the Caped Crusader and
Kurt Angle. So far, CC has not put up
much of a fight. He repels down to the
ring and looks determined. As with their
other matches, Kurt owned this one.
After hitting 2 Angle Slams on CC, Kurt goes to the corner and removed
the padded turnbuckle exposing the metal brackets. Music hits and Kurt is startled to see who
comes out. It’s none other than…JEFF JARRETT!!! Kurt questions what is going on as Jarrett is
not a member of either the HWF or CSWA roster.
The Caped Crusader recovers and nails Kurt with the Wam!Bam!Pow! but
Kurt recovers and charges CC. CC trips
Kurt and he bashes his head into the exposed metal brackets busting him
open. The ref rings the bell and awards
this fall to the Caped Crusader. Jeff Jarrett helps the Crusader up and helps
him to the back while Kurt, sporting a crimson mask, stews in the ring. (10 min)
The
Beautiful People (Southern Belle, Velvet Sky, Madison Rayne and Angelina Love)
all meet in the interview area. They
talk about going after the Women’s title except one person will not. They all look at Belle and say that ever
since she lost the Diva’s title, she’s become a liability they no longer want
to be associated with. Velvet Sky ends up firing Belle from the team. She is no longer one of them. Belle leaves with her head held low.
Bray
Wyatt says that he and Austin Aries will meet one more time and it will be in
tonight’s main event for the Undisputed Heavyweight title. He cuts a promo.
"They
say that patience is a virtue. But in my estimation, it's a lost art. People
want everything now, now, now and they want more, and more, and more of it.
They don't realize that beyond their precious city walls there is another world
and it's full of animals just like yours: my world. And in my world, when one
of my animals is sick or hurt we don't let them fumble around in agony. We put
'em down. Hey, you want to see something really scary? Don't you worry about a
thing, Abigail. I'm going to put 'em all down. I'm going to put 'em down. Austin Aries, tonight, you become one less
threat to my championship."
The
next match on the card is for the Diva’s title.
The challenger Brie Bella comes out first followed by her sister the
Diva’s Champion Taylor Bella. Before the
match can begin, Taylor pleads with her sister to not go through with
this. The bell rings and Taylor pokes
Brie in the chest (dreaded finger of doom) and Brie lays down in the ring. Taylor laughs as she goes for the cover. The ref counts 1…music hits and out runs
Jupiter Jane. She rushes the ring but
Taylor bails out. She ends up chasing
her to the back resulting in an unexpected count out victory for Brie. (30 seconds)
In
the back, CSWA World Champion Austin Aries says that he will make headline news
tonight when he takes the Undisputed Heavyweight title from Bray…something no
one has been able to do. He says that
everyone in Vegas can bet on him to lock this up as a sure thing.
We
head back to the ring for the Tag Team title match between the challengers the
Band (Dirk Devon and the Axe) vs the champions the Desperados (El Chango and
the Stache). No time is wasted as the
Band goes on the attack right off the bat.
This was nothing short of total domination. I’ve never seen a team do so poorly as the
Band did. The Desperados beat the holy
hell out of their opponents and in 14 minutes, comes to and end after El Chango
caught Dirk Devon with a shooting star press. The champs retain but they have
little time to celebrate as the Ascension run down and attack all 4 men. The band were in no shape to defend
themselves so they got destroyed pretty easily.
The champs were taken out by chair shots from MJ and then dropped with
the “Fall of Man”. The Ascension pick up
the titles and pose with them before dropping them amid the destruction they
just caused. MJ says the Ascension will
get a rematch however they are holding off invoking their rematch clause…until
they’re ready.
In
the back, Big Show is being interviewed and is interrupted by Curtis Axel. Axel says that “Axel-mania is running wild”
and it should be he being interviewed.
Axel makes fun of Big Show for losing to #CJ. Show replies with “Well, at least I didn’t’
get pinned in a title match by my FATHER’S signature wrestling move.” Show laughs and Axel slaps him across the
face. Big Show begins to hulk up. GM Max McGillicutty hops in and says that
there will be no backstage brawling. The
two of them will meet in a ring next week.
It
is time for our main event and the steel cage has finished being
constructed. Bray Wyatt and Austin Aries
fight for the Undisputed Heavyweight title and only one will walk away with the
belt. Bray dominated the match. Aries could not get any real offense started.
After smashing Austin’s face in the cage, he blinded him by raking his face
across the ring rope. He then climbed
the cage and just as he was about to go over the top, he turned and lept
nailing a B-52 kneedrop from the top of the cage to a prone Aries on the mat. More HOLY SHIT chants went out. Bray manages to make the cover for the 1-2-3
and then makes his way out of the cage to win the match. Bray Wyatt retains the Undisputed title. After the match, Bray got on the mic and said
that Brock’s time right now is being occupied by Sting so in the meantime, he
wants to address someone who stuck their nose in his business last show…Big Van
Vader. Bray acknowledges that Vader is
only there on a short term contract and he will deal with him soon enough. Vader runs out and blasts Bray. Vader hits Bray with a Vader Bomb on the exposed
metal ramp and Bray is in pain. Vader
stands over him to the cheering of the fans as the show comes to an end.
Stay
tuned for more action.
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