Thursday, March 27, 2014

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2014 – 03.08

Hello fans and welcome back to our newsletter.  We start off with a bunch of news before talking about show results.
 

After arriving in Sacramento, CA, VamChango immediately went to the back and met up with the Diva’s.  Together, they started to help prepare them for their first “drag” appearance.  All in all, hanging out with hot women isn’t crimping their style at all.
 

Next, we have a retraction to make.  In the last issue, we mentioned that Jackie was 2-1 when in fact, she is only 1-1.  Her first win did not count towards the Best 3 of 5 stipulation Master Bull put forth.  She needs to win 2 more of her next 3 matches in order to go to Wrestlemania.
 

Master Bull is in his office when Clarkus Kentus runs up and is banging on the door.  Clarkus explains the FBI is here and need to speak with him.   Master Bull brings them into his office.  They show him a picture of an individual.  “Yeah, he’s on my roster…so?  They explain that this person is actually in Witness protection and should not be showcased on television.  Master Bull says he will take it under advisement and the FBI leave.  Master Bull places the picture on the table before leaving.  We get a good look at the picture and it is none other than Wam Bam Arsonist.  I’m sure there’s more to this than meets the eye.
 

Raquel, still nursing her foot is talking to Reid about his attitude.  “Listen, sometimes you just need to let things go.  Getting cheered by the fans isn’t a bad thing.”  Reid looks her in the eyes “For you, I’ll think about it.  It’s more than just you and I though.  We are talking about Prestige Inc.  If the King and Magnus aren’t on board, we could be talking about the demise of the very thing that makes us unique.”  “At the end of the day sweetie, it’s about how you feel.  You will do what is right, of course.”  She gives Reid a quick kiss and then leaves.  Reid is left pondering. 
 

Donnie B and Jeff Meyers meet with Board of Directors.  They discuss that having Hogan in a shared GM role is good for business as shows are selling out more frequently.  The board tell the owners that whoever wins between team Bull and team Hogan that it is only for managing rights; they cannot EVER make a play for ownership of the federation (referencing back to Negronomicon’s hostile takeover and subsequently running the company into the ground).  Donnie B promises that will never, eeeeeeever happen aGAIN.
 

Goldust and Cody Rhodes walk up to the Diva’s and starts to proposition them.  All but two walk away.  Cody and Goldust cozy up to the stragglers and as they turn around, they see its El Chango and Senor Vampiro.  Goldust leaps back in surprise and barks at them and starts to walk away.  VamChango attack the Rhodes Brothers.  Cody and Goldust yell they want them in the ring.  Hogan walks up and makes two singles matches for the night.  He turns to VamChango before leaving and says “Nice outfits…SISTERS.”
 

The first match of the night is Wam Bam Arsonist taking on Dirk “the Pick” Devon.  The match never gets underway due to the two brawling and the ref not regaining control.  He ends up throwing the match out.
 

A quick vignette with Diamond Dallas Page and he says that Team Respect is complete but everyone will have to wait until Wrestlemania to see who the remaining partner will be.
 

Bran-Don-Goh comes out to defend the Elitist title against Professor Cobra.  The match is pretty lackluster as there wasn’t a whole lot going on.  About 15 minutes into the match, Reid Rothchild comes out and blasts both men with a chair causing the DQ. However, since both men were attacked, the ref couldn’t award the match to one person so it ended up being a double disqualification.  Master Bull comes out and adds another match to the Wrestlemania card.  It will be Bran-Don-Goh vs Professor Cobra vs “The Elitist” Reid Rothchild in a triple threat match.  None of the men looked happy about it but will just have to deal.
 

The next match has El Chango (in high-class drag) taking on Goldust.  In 24 minutes, El Chango gets the win after hitting a Shooting Star Press.
 

Next up is Senor Vampiro taking on Cody Rhodes.  Vampiro is also dressed in his high-class drag outfit.  In only 5 minutes, Vampiro gets the win after hitting the Mexican Facebuster and rolled Cody up for the 1-2-3.
 

Cactus Jackie comes out for her next match.  Obviously she is unhappy with Master Bull “modifying” her record.  Her opponent is Angelina Love.  About 5 minutes in, Master Bull comes out and stands on the stage.  Jackie sees him and gets thrown off her game.  At 8 minutes in, Angelina hits a top rope cross body block and gets the pin.  This puts Jackie’s win/loss at 1 win, 2 losses.  She needs to win her next two matches or she may not get to participate at Wrestlemania.  She glares at Master Bull from the ring.  Bull smiles and waves.  He has a mic. 
 
“I hope you are all enjoying the show tonight.  We still have a couple of matches left but I have some additional announcements to make.    First, I want to say that with Wrestlemania taking place over 4 days, I am hoping to have everyone on the roster participate in some way, shape or fashion. Now, not everyone is involved in a feud so there will be matches made that may not make sense.  Those not currently involved in a feud will have opponents picked at random.  I will make sure that everyone gets a shot at a payday…Yes, even you Jackie, even if it’s not for a title.”  Master Bull waves to the crowd and then leaves.  Cactus Jackie eventually leaves the ring.
 

Our second to last match has Darren Young taking on Titus O’Neil.  The match goes 22 minutes with Darren kicking his former partner’s butt.  Titus had enough and threw Darren out of the ring.  Darren decided he’d had enough and walked away (not sure why when he was winning the match).  The ref counts him out and awards the match to Titus.  Hulk Hogan came out this time and said that this was not the way things were going down under his watch so he is making another match at Wrestlemania…Darren Young vs Titus O’Neil in a Steel Cage.  Young was not happy about it but Titus couldn’t contain his enthusiasm rubbing his hands together and looked like a lion getting ready to feast on raw flesh.  Darren retreated quickly.  Titus eventually followed.
 

The main event is to determine the #1 contender for the US Title.  This match has Captain Charisma Christian taking on the Great White Hope Sheamus.  In only 6 short minutes, Christian nails Sheamus with a one-man concerto and gets the win.  After the match, US Champion Antonio Cesaro runs down and attacks Christian while North American Champion Alberto Del Rio comes out and attacks Sheamus.  Sheamus nails a Brogue Kick and nearly removes Alberto’s head from his shoulders.  He locks Alberto in a cloverleaf and yells for Del Rio to put his title on the line at Wrestlemania.  Del Rio, screaming in pain, relents.   We now know of 2 people who will be wrestling multiple times at the PPV. 
 

Hulk Hogan comes out again to end the show and thank everyone for coming.  He has a table and chairs set up off the side (it looks a little line the setup from the Tonight Show).  He says that this segment is called HulkNation and what he is gonna do when Hulkamania runs wild on Wrestlemania.  He calls out his guest and it is Master Bull.  Master Bull says that he will have his team ready and Hogan’s Cocoa Puffs had better be ready.  Hogan says not to worry that Team Hogan will dismantle Team Franks and Beans and he will be the sole GM.  Hogan gets up and starts to pose.  Master Bull says he has one final announcement and that there will be a battle royal at the PPV and this will be one in remembrance of the late great Andre the Giant.  Hogan looks floored.  “That was gonna be my announcement, BROTHER.  You are stealing my ideas.”  Master Bull looks at him and says “My idea CP (short for Cocoa Puff).  Thank you fans for coming.  Stay tuned as Wrestlemania will be a blockbuster event like no other.”
 

The show ends with Hogan and Master Bull arguing.  Thanks for reading.  Stay tuned for more.

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