Monday, July 12, 2021

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2021 #912


Hello fans and welcome back to another installment of the HCW Wrestling Newsletter.  Last show, we saw DD Double D Duo member and jerk extraordinaire Dash Woodbrick attack his partner Dennis Marshall for no apparent reason.  Tonight, I expect we’ll hear something from at least one of them.  We will also get an update on the Steel Curtain after the attack at the hands of Devastation Inc.  World Champion Jack Lumber will be here defending his championship.  All this and more so let’s get this action going.

 

We cut backstage where we see Dennis Marshall walking in from outside and says he is here and wants Dash to meet him in the ring.

 

Pyro goes off and our first match is ready to get underway.  AC/DC’s ‘TNT’ starts to play before it’s abruptly shut off and replaced with standard music (we do not have permission to use the song) and TNT comes out annoyed that his music was changed.  He power walks to the ring and then climbs in all the while mocking the fans.  The music changed and out comes the Anytime/Anywhere Champion Master Bull.  Bull gets a huge pop from the fans and shakes hands with them as he makes his way to the ring.  TNT attacked Bull before the match started by throwing him into the steel steps and smashing his head against the ring post.  TNT held control of the match early on until Master Bull stared to make a comeback.  All that went out the window when Dash Woodbrick’s music started to play.  Bull made a mistake taking his eyes off of TNT who turned around and planted Bull in the center of the ring with a massive powerbomb.  TNT made the cover and got the 1-2-3 to become the NEW Anytime/Anywhere champion.  TNT snatched the title from the ref and started showboating. 

 

The great thing about this title is that it can be challenged for at any time or in any place.  With a ref still in the ring, Master Bull rolled out of the ring and grabbed a steel chair.  He slid back in and SMASHED TNT with it until the big man was on his hands and knees.  Bull had the ref start the match and he went for a pin but TNT powered out.  You could tell that TNT was totally winded and had trouble catching his breath.  At the 7 min mark, Master Bull hit TNT with the Roman Flapjack and hooked the leg as the ref counted 1…2….3.  Master Bull has just regained the Anytime/Anywhere title.  Bull made his way to the back a little miffed at the BS that Dash perpetrated. 

 

A moment passed and the fans pop as Dennis Marshall makes his way out.  He shakes hands with the fans and climbs into the ring.  He gets on the mic and asks Dash Woodbrick to join him in the ring.  He is kept waiting (as Dash tends to do) but finally made his way out to some of the loudest booing a superstar in HCW has ever gotten.  Dash ignores the fans (and flipped off a couple in the process of walking to the ring) and climbed the stairs and entered the ring.  Dennis says he knows that Dash is disappointed in him and may even feel that he was the weak link but he says he is not.  The fans know this (huge pop) so Dash needs to also.  Dennis says he wants to offer a peace offering and presents Dash with a gift card to Red Lobster.  Dash looks disgusted but takes the card anyway.  He turns (he’s doing something on his phone) and then grabs the mic out of Dennis’s hand.  “What kind of crap are you trying to pull?  This gift card is EMPTY!  Are you trying to make me look foolish?”  Dennis started to snicker (because, well, everyone’s lot in life is to make Dash look foolish) and Dash immediately attacks Dennis.  Dennis started to fight back but Dash kicked him in the nether regions and Dennis fell to the mat.  Dash turned to leave, stopped, and picked up the gift card before walking away (guess he was the one full of s**t).  Dash is half way up the ramp before Dennis is back on his feet and has a mic in hand.  I’m literally and legitimately going to kick your ass” he says before dropping the mic and taking off after Dash.  Dash did like his name and ran off like a scalded dog.  The fans pop for Dennis as he waves to the fans before disappearing behind the curtain.

 

We head back to the office of GM Max McGillicutty.  The Banker is in there with his manager Ruth Heartless.  The Banker demands that Max give him back the TV title that that Neanderthal Maximillian Redbeard stole from him.  Max refuses.  The Banker says that he is going to make life very tough for Max.  Ruth adds in that he will be hearing from their lawyers.

 

 Next up we have some tag team action.  First, the Freedom Fighters (Justice and Flash) make their way out to a decent pop from the crowd (only because of who they are getting ready to face).  They make their way into the ring and prepare for their match.  Next, the music changed and out comes Tommy Lightning and ‘the Bounty Hunter’ Jake Montrose.  The duo are booed as they head to the ring.  Tommy immediately demands a mic and then proceeds to tell everyone that he and Montrose will be the next Tag Team Champions.  It doesn’t go over very well.  The match finally begins.  In the early minutes of the match, Tommy got ‘injured’ and remained on the outside of the ring leaving Jake to fend for himself.  Eventually he ‘recovered’ and Jake made the hot tag.  Try as they could, neither team could get a pin or submission and this battle ended up going the full 30 minutes.  The match ends in a draw.  The Freedom Fighters left without further incident but Tommy and Jake stayed behind.  Tommy kept complaining to the referee until the fans popped HUGE as the World Tag Team Champions Buzz and Starbuck Steel returned.  They came in through the crowd and hit the ring dispatching of Tommy and Jake.  Tommy and the Bounty Hunter grumbled as they made their way to the back.

 

In the ring, Buzz and Starbuck announce that they are ok.  The fans pop even louder.  Starbuck says that they always knew the Ambassador was going to try and do something; they just underestimated as to when.  Buzz chimes in and says it will never happen again.  He says that with the dissolution of DD Double D Duo, Dash Woodbrick is out of the picture however there are plenty of teams who want a shot at the gold – Tommy and Jake, the Smashers, hell, practically everyone on the roster will be gunning for them.  Starbuck adds that they will not shy from ANY challenge (fans pop again) and that regardless of what is thrown at them, they will be the Champions of the People!  Buzz leans in and is about to say something when the fans yell out “WORD”.  Buzz smiles “Hey, this isn’t singalong with the Steel Curtain”.  Everyone laughs.  Buzz and Starbuck look at each other and then at the camera and say “Word”.  The champs leave to a huge pop from the crowd.

 

Backstage, the Smashers are watching the monitor and appear to be disgusted.  They say that they are immediately challenging for the Tag Team Titles.  Unfortunately for the Steel Curtain, this title reign will be a short one.

 

We go back to the ring for our next match.  First, ‘Sassy’ Maxine DeVito comes out and power walks to the ring.  She gets massive amounts of booing from the crowd and she responds by flipping them off.  She tells the ‘sheep’ that she will be the next Ladies Champion and they will just have to accept it.  The music changes and out comes Catalina Harper.  Catalina is cheered as she walks to the ring; shaking hands with the fans.  Maxine has a disgusted look on her face.  Catalina says that Maxine may be on the road to a title match but she is the obstacle in the road.  Catalina says that Maxine needs to go through her first.  The match begins.  Maxine controls the match for the first six minutes of the match but then after smacking Maxine with a CAT-astrophic blow, the tide turned in her favor.  Maxine tried to get counted out but Catalina dragged her back to the ring. Maxine began a comeback and went for the Sass Attack but then Ladies Champion Violet Valkyrie came out caused a distraction.  Catalina ducked and hit a teeth-jarring forearm uppercut.  Catalina rolled her up and got the 3 count.   Catalina gets the win and the fans pop in approval.  Violet, standing on the stage with mic in hand, tells Maxine this is only the beginning and she will get what’s coming to her.  Violet leaves first followed by Catalina.  Maxine remains in the ring stewing before also leaving.  (19 min)

 

Backstage, Ovaltine Jackson, who is getting a shot at Jack Lumber’s World Title is walking backstage.  He is then blindsided by…the Banker.  The Banker beats Ovaltine down with his briefcase leaving him in a heap on the ground.  The Banker says that he is assuming the title match and will keep doing whatever he needs to in order for Max to return his property.  If he happens to also hold the World title, so be it.

 

We head back to the ring and Superstar Chic Monroe makes his way out to a nice pop from the crowd.  He gets into the ring and the Swedish Superman begins to stretch to prepare for his opponent.  The music changed and out comes the Wicked Prophet.  Prophet is booed loudly but he ignores them.  He gets into the ring and gets into Chic’s face asking if he’s done doing his warm up, can they get this one going?  The match begins and although both men were pretty even in the first few minutes, Prophet began do dominate and take over.  As the 9th minute of the match began, Prophet hit the Exile from the Ring sending Monroe tumbling to the floor.  He followed him out and hurled Chic repeatedly into the ringside barrier.  When the ref reached the 9 count, Prophet rolled back in.  The ref continued to 10 and since Chic was not getting up, he got counted out.  The Wicked Prophet gets the win via count out.  Prophet snatches the microphone and says that Casper Wyoming’s win over him was tainted.  It was clear that his foot was on the bottom rope (it was) and that the ref must have been paid off in cow patties (he wasn’t) for missing the glaringly obvious.  Casper Wyoming comes out and stands on the stage.  He calls Prophet a whining ninny and says that if he wants a rematch, he is ready at any time.  Prophet leaves the ring and charges up the ramp at Casper.  Casper meets him half way and the two brawl on the ramp.  Prophet ends up being back bodydropped on the ramp but hits Casper with the SMITE.  Before he could do any more, a bunch of refs ran out and got in-between them.   We are sure this one won’t be over for a while.  (9 ½ min for the match; 5 for the aftermath).

 

Backstage, World Champion Jack Lumber berates the Banker for taking out his opponent tonight.  “Banker, that was a very underhanded thing you did taking out Ovaltine tonight.  I don’t know if you are craving attention but you sure have mine.  Tonight, I’ll be planting a tree in your name after I chop you down to size.”  Jack left to head to the ring.

 

It’s time for our main event.  First, the loudspeakers blare out “Everyone has a price…for the Banker…HA HA HA” and out comes the Banker and his manager Ruth Heartless.  Ruth has the briefcase in hand and nods to the Banker and they head to the ring.  The Banker is booed heavily and he sneers at the fans.  He gets into the ring and paces like a caged animal.  Next, the loudspeakers blare out “TIMMMBBBERRRR” and out comes the World Champion Jack Lumber.  The fans are on their feet and give Jack the loudest pop of the night.   Jack makes his customary stop by the Lumber Lounge and then heads to the ring.  He gets into the ring and removes his title and climbs the turnbuckle holding the title high eliciting an even louder pop from the crowd.  Jack keeps a wary eye on the Banker and steps down.  He hands the title to the ref but the Banker makes a grab for it.  Jack then shoved the Banker and he fell on his ass and the fans popped.  The Banker, embarrassed, then attacked Jack starting this one off.

 

===== In the 1st minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Both Men in rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a THE AXE....

 

The Banker executes a CREDIT CHECK CHOP....

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...

The Banker kicks out of the pin!

 

===== In the 2nd minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a SPEAR....

 

The Banker neutralizes SPEAR.

 

===== In the 3rd minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC/TT

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a ATOMIC DROP....

 

The Banker executes a DEPOSIT DIVING DDT....

 

===== In the 4th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC/TT

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a SPEAR....

 

The Banker absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...2...

The Banker kicks out of the pin!

 

===== In the 5th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a STIFF UPPERCUT....

 

The Banker executes a REPOSSESSION RIB-BUSTER....

 

===== In the 6th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Both Men in rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a ATOMIC DROP....

 

The Banker attempts to defend against ATOMIC DROP but is unsuccessful.

 

===== In the 7th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a KICK TO MIDSECTION....

 

The Banker attempts to defend against KICK TO MIDSECTION but is unsuccessful.

 

===== In the 8th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Both Men in rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Both Men in rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a TIMMMMMBEEERRRRR....

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...2...

The Banker kicks out of the pin!

 

Ruth Heartless executes a Eye Gouge Foe....

 

Jack Lumber is on defense for 2 more rounds.

 

===== In the 9th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

The Banker executes a WITHDRAWL POWERSLAM....

 

Jack Lumber reverses WITHDRAWL POWERSLAM!

Jack Lumber executes a YUKON BODYSLAM....

 

The Banker absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...2...

The Banker kicks out of the pin!

 

Jack Lumber is on defense for 1 more rounds.

 

===== In the 10th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled DC

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

The Banker executes a CREDIT CHECK CHOP....

 

Jack Lumber absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber is no longer on defense.

 

===== In the 11th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a YUKON BODYSLAM....

 

The Banker executes a CREDIT CHECK CHOP....

 

===== In the 12th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a CHOP TO CHEST....

 

The Banker executes a DEPOSIT DIVING DDT....

 

===== In the 13th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a ELBOW SMASH....

 

The Banker neutralizes ELBOW SMASH.

 

===== In the 14th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a BEARHUG....

 

The Banker absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber straps in the BEARHUG.

The Banker does not submit!

 

===== In the 15th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled OC.

 

Jack Lumber executes a SPEAR....

 

The Banker executes a CREDIT CHECK CHOP....

 

===== In the 16th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a YUKON BODYSLAM....

 

The Banker absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...

The Banker kicks out of the pin!

 

===== In the 17th minute of the match: =====

 

Jack Lumber rolled OC.

 

TV Champion Maximillian Redbeard comes out on stage.  The Banker sees him and is distracted. 

 

The Banker rolled DC

 

Jack Lumber executes a YUKON BODYSLAM....

 

The Banker absorbs the punishment.

 

Jack Lumber is attempting a pin!!!

 

1...2...3

The Banker was pinned by Jack Lumber!!!

 

 

Jack Lumber wins with a YUKON BODYSLAM over The Banker!!!

 

 

Jack Lumber gets the win and retains his title much to the dismay of the Banker and Ruth Heartless.  Ruth pulls the Banker out of the ring and helps him to the back.  Jack stays in the ring and celebrates with the fans as the show goes off the air.

 

Thanks for reading.  Stay tuned as more is coming.

 

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