Hello
fans and welcome back to the 450th issue of our newsletter. Well, it’s official. The Attitude Adjustment (Abyss & Adam
Rose) have officially split. We caught up with both men backstage and Abyss was
yelling at Rose for being so single minded.
Rose said that Abyss quit on their team and he’s overreacted. Abyss blows him off and goes to leave and
Adam Rose attacks him. The two had to be
separated.
We
head to the ring for our first match.
First, “Slater Gator” Heath Slater makes his way down to the ring. His opponent, Bobby Lashley, comes out next
to a good pop. As expected, Lashley beat
the snot out of Slater and it only took 6 minutes and a Dominator to score the
win. Lashley celebrates with the fans
before leaving. (6 min)
We
go to a prerecorded video and it shows Dr. Red Fang and a cameraman (who
happens to be masked) and they end up in a seedy part of town (but no one wants
a part of Dr. Red Fang). They enter a
bar and Fang points and sees US Champion Phat Sol standing alone. Dr. Red Fang tells the cameraman to get some
shots and he attacks Phat Sol. He takes
the camera and takes some close up shots of him beating the snot out of
Phat. He hands the camera back to the
cameraman and grabs Phat by the face with both of his hands and says “This is only the
beginning. Next, I take your title Blood
Bag!” He then shoves Phat to the floor
and orders the cameraman to leave with him.
The bartender looks on before placing the call to 9-1-1.
We
go back to the ring for our next match which has New Day (Big E, Kofi Kingston
and Xavier Woods) defending the 6 Man titles against the team of Robbie E,
Rockstar Spud and the Intercontinental Champion Ethan Carter III. For the first 7 minutes, New Day looked like
they were in a daze and did not look like champions. It wasn’t until Big E got in the ring that
things changed. Double teaming
immediately commenced and then they just shined. Constant tags from the champs kept their
opponents on the D. Towards the end of
the match, Kofi made the hot tag just as Robbie E got tagged in and Kofi nailed
him with a float-over DDT. ECIII and Spud
were not paying attention and that was all Kofi needed to get the 3 count. New Day is victorious in their first title
defense. Robbie, Spud and ECIII all left
while New Day celebrated in the ring.
(18 min)
Before
the next segment could begin, shown on the Omegatron is a tweet from the
Hashtag King CJ: “Awwwwwww shit the big
red machine the big show and the king look the *BLEEP* out!!!!!! Kinda sounds
like hell is coming... Bray and the desperados better look the hell out”
This
leads to the next segment where Big Show, Kane and King CJ all make their way
down to the ring. All 3 men take a
mic. Show starts off with calling the
Desperados cowards as it took 4 of them to take him down. Kane then chimes in and says that he and Show
at one time were the most dominant tag team in the history of the CSWA and HWF
and for a long time, were unstoppable.
Now, they have chosen to align themselves with the Hashtag who, by the
looks of it, is itching to say something.
Kane motions to CJ.
CJ: “Well well well look what we have here....
sounds kinda like a joke...a machine, a giant and a king walk into a ring..
But
guess what .... the joke is on you and i promise you the punch line is gonna
knock you on your ass!!!! You see i know what your thinking. .. that you 3 can
just run around watch each others backs save each others asses whenever your on
the wromg side of a beating and know one is gonna help or step up for each
other. Errrrrr wrong... you see this unlikely trio (points to Kane and Big
Show) dont bow down to bullies or dudes who think they are tough in
packs...this trio was formed out of mutual respect...weve beat the hell out of
each other..weve beat the hell outta you and yeah weve all been a victim to
your cowardly ways....but that stops now...that stops today…Just know we are
watching you...we are watching out for each other....but most importantly KNOW
WE ARE STALKING YOU!!!! WE ARE THE PREDATOR AND YOU ARE THE PREY!!! so watch
your backs .... #....CJ.....KING CJ OUT” (drops the mic). Kane and Big Show look at each other and drop
their mics and they all leave at the same time.
GM
Max McGillicutty is in his office and his phone ring. “Oh hey, how’s it going? You don’t say. You want to be part of Wrestlemania? Really? Well, I know things are in the works
but I know that we can for sure work you into the program. Huh? WHO
wants in? Are you kidding me? Damn, that could be the best Wrestlemania
EVER if we could pull that off. Yeah,
THOSE people called again. I passed
along the message but I guess our owners have too much going on right now. You don’t say…Well, I can tell you this. Feel free to show up at any time and let’s
chat about getting you BOTH on the show.
Next week? That works for me. Do you want the owners in on this? Done.
See you next week.” Max hangs up
the phone and has a huge smile on his face.
“This is going to be BIG.”
We
go back to the ring for a tag team match.
First, Uhaa Nation and Mr. Wrestling #5 come out first to a mixed
reaction from the fans. They are then
followed out by the brother team of Travis and Terra Ryzing. Both men were booed on their way to the ring
and Terra ate it up more than his brother did.
The match finally began and Terra Ryzing started off against Uhaa
Nation. Nation OWNED him. Terra got frustrated often and tagged out to
his brother. Travis “Dark Storm” Ryzing started
to take the match to the masked superstar but after missing out on the Dark
Storm, Mr. Wrestling #5 caught him with a front chancery and then pinned him in
the middle of the ring. Terra never
entered the ring as he was jawjacking with the fans at ringside. After the bell rang, Terra jumped back in and
attacked MW5 but Uhaa quickly eliminated him from the ring. Terra and Travis sulked to the back and this
time, the fans laid into them. (12 min)
In
the back, we meet up with the elusive Randy Orton and he says that Bray Wyatt
has been running through the rosters and he feels he is the only one to stop
him. Orton issues a challenge to Wyatt
for the World title. Orton says he’s one
RKO from becoming World Champion again.
We
are back in the ring for more action Wade Barrett vs Dirk ‘the Pick’
Devon. Pick was already in the ring
before Wade made his way down. Dirk has
been a thorn in the side of the Axe for some time since their split and Dirk
won’t give up. It just so happens that
the Axe made his way out for this match and sat at commentary. Dirk was distracted by the Axe’s presence so
he was off his game and Barrett took advantage of that. Barrett ended up throwing Dirk over the top
rope and the Axe flew from the commentary desk and leveled Dirk with the
Axe. He then threw Dirk back into the
ring. Barrett nailed a Winds of Change
side slam and that was all she wrote.
Barrett picks up the win and then leaves. The Axe climbs into the ring and stares at
his once former partner and then turns and leaves. Dirk eventually makes it to his feet and
leaves on his own. His eyes reflected a
look that could kill. (9 min)
Founding
member of Prestige Inc. Magnus is talking with his partners Damian Sandow and
Reid Rothchild and says he’s decided to call it quits and retire so he can go
home and start a family. Reid and Sandow
wish him the best. After Magnus left, Sandow
then says they can’t waste any time and need to fill that spot. Reid suggests that Prestige Inc. remain a 2
man team for now. Sandow says something is
in the air and the atmosphere doesn’t feel right. Reid tells him its change and things will be
fine. Sandow is not so sure.
Time
for more in-ring action. A-Team member
Antonio Cesaro makes his way out first.
His opponent tonight is the Bulgarian Bully Alexander Rusev. Rusev calls Cesaro the weak link of the
A-Team and say he could better represent that team. Cesaro showed Rusev that he must has been
confused as Cesaro TORE Rusev apart. It
didn’t take long for Cesaro to nail a Swiss Uppercut and pin Rusev in the
middle of the ring. Cesaro got cheered
as he left. Rusev…not so much. (8 min)
We
head to the back where Dr. Red Fang is being interviewed by Clarkus Kentus who
has armed guards surrounding (protecting) him.
He tells Fang that they saw the video earlier. After glaring at Clarkus, he says “I don’t
answer your stupid questions. My
actions dictate my desires.” Dr. Red
Fang then walked off.
It’s
time for our Main Event: North American
Champion Kevin Owens defends his title against X-Factor member Austin
Aries. Aries says it’s time for a
changing of the guard and Owens doesn’t appreciate it. Aries owned the match for 16 minutes but
after that, the champ started to take over.
Both men hit their specialty moves numerous times but it goes to show
that ring savvy these two have keep their hopes alive. Owens nailed an Apron Bomb and Aries had just
enough to dropkick Owens off the mat to the floor where he crashed (hard) into
the commentary table. Aries was able to
suck in enough oxygen to get himself up and back into the ring by the 6 count
but he was finished. Owens struggled to
get to his feet after his collision with the commentary desk and he couldn’t
get his legs to cooperate. Owens ends up
getting counted out and Aries wins the match but the title does NOT change
hands on a countout. Kevin Owens did not
win this battle but he did retain his title. (27 min)
Back
in his office, GM Max McGillicutty receives another phone call. He says that he passed along the message but
not sure why calls aren’t being returned.
He says he’ll personally place a call to find out. After hanging up, Max dials a number and says
“There may be a problem. We need to
meet.” Max looks at the camera and asks
them to leave.
With
that, the show comes to an end. I guess
we’ll have to wait to see who our mysterious callers are. Stay tuned.
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