Tuesday, March 24, 2015

HWF/CSWA Wrestling Newsletter 2015 – 03.07


Hello fans and welcome back to our newsletter.  Our 350th episode was a huge hit with fans from all over the world.  Wrestlemania continues to shape up very nicely as the PPV draws near.  The PPV will be taking place in Chicago on April 10, 11 and 12th with the Fanfest taking place 2 days prior.  The HWF and CSWA will be taking over the Windy City.  Do you have your ticket?  If not, you will be able to catch us live on PPV.

The show begins with GM’s Master Bull and Hulk Hogan entering the arena.  The lights suddenly go out and come back on seconds later.  Standing in their midst is the one and only Undertaker.  Taker asks GM’s Master Bull and Hulk Hogan for permission to wrestle in the HWF even though he is rostered to the CSWA.  For once, the GM’s agree that it is best for business and will allow it but tell Undertaker that his match against Bray should also have the title on the line.   Sheamus walks over and says he’s the #1 contender for the HWF World title and shouldn’t be taking a back seat to anyone – even someone as great as the Undertaker.  Bull says that tonight, Sheamus will take on the Undertaker and the winner meets Bray for the HWF World title. 

We head to the ring for our first match which has Sonic Blade heading to the ring for his match against Adam Rose for his spot for the North American title.  Rose totally dominated Sonic Blade and of course, the match wouldn’t have been complete if it weren’t for outside interference.  This time, Lucas Johnston came out and as Rose distracted the ref, Lucas bashed Sonic Blade multiple times with chair shots.  Johnston takes off through the crowd.  Adam Rose nails a Samoan driver and makes the cover for the 1-2-3.  Adam Rose retains his spot.  Sonic Blade has to be helped from the ring.  (17 min)

Wade Barrett makes his way to the ring and says that he is wondering where all the supposed talent is in the HWF.  Roman Reigns comes out and says that he wants to challenge Wade for his X-Division spot.  Wade looks hungry and accepts the match.  Wade started off strong but after 3 minutes started to fizzle.  Roman then took over and beat the holy hell out of Wade.  He seemed to enjoy it and totally dominates Barrett. Finally, he hits the Moment of Silence (belly to back urange) and then makes the cover for the 1-2-3.  Reigns gets the win and then issues a challenge to X-Division champ Kane.  The lights go out and then fire blasts up from the ringposts.  Reigns turns around and there is Kane.  Kane hits a Chokeslam on the unsuspecting Reigns.  Reigns is down and Kane stands over him holding his title.  Looks like another match is on the books.  (18 min match; 20 min segment)

In the back, El Chango and the Stache are filming a commercial for their respective brands (Fruit Roll Up for the Stache and Slim Jim for El Chango).  “What a joke” sounds from off set.  “You think that you film a commercial that you are better than everyone now?”  From off-set walks over Buff Austin (formerly Senor Vampiro aka Superfan Brian).  “From the 719 Cartel to World Tag Team Champions to a joke with a cowboy.  Wow, you sure have fallen a long way there Chango ol’ chap.”  El Chango gets in his face and asks “What do you want?  Haven’t we done the ‘been there, done that’?  However, I your trying to pick a fight, I won’t’ back down.”  Buff Austin scoffs at him.  “You’re soft.  Hollywood has made you weak.  Sure, I’ll take you on…for old time’s sake.”  He turns to the Stache.  “Back off Lone Ranger.  This is between me and Chango.  See you in the ring.”
                                                                    
The Scorpion Warrior heads to the ring with one-third of the 6 Man tag team championship. Sting says that he loves being in the HWF and CSWA where only the best competitors are.  The Warriors never back down from any challenge.  He is then interrupted by Xavier Woods.  Woods storms down to the ring (power walks) and gets into Sting’s face.  Woods says that people like Sting always overlook people like him since he is not steroided up like other people are.   Xavier tells Sting that he could never beat him.  Sting asks if Woods wants a match.  Woods agrees.  This was a pretty one-sided match but exactly opposite of what you would think.  Woods was MOPPING the floor with the Scorpion Warrior (ok, maybe not mopping but dominating for sure).  After catching Sting with a CreeDDT, he makes the cover and gets the clean 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring.  Xavier smiles as his hand is raised and he tells Sting to let the other Warriors know they are coming after the 6 man titles…one way or another.  (13 min)

Southern Belle is in the back being interviewed and she says that she is really looking forward to meeting Raquel in the ring for the titles.  She has worked extremely hard to get to this point and nothing will stop her.  Cactus Jackie walks in and interrupts and says that at one time, Jackie was Queen.  She then got discarded like yesterday’s newspaper.  Belle will be no different.  Belle is a flash in the pan and does not have what it takes to be a champion unlike her.  Belle responds “If you are so great, why aren’t you the champion?”  Jackie then slaps her across the face.  “Meet me in the ring bitch and I’ll show you.”  Belle began to hulk up but Fusion Valentine, Madison Rayne and Angelina Love ran over and calmed her down.  Love says the Beautiful People stick together and they will be in Belle’s corner.

We go back to the ring and the old west music hits.  El Chango w/the Stache come out to a huge pop.  They make their way to the ring.  The music is abruptly cut off as Buff Austin makes his way to the ring.  Buff says that he wants El Chango to put his X-Division title shot on the line and Chango agrees.  This one is pretty short as Austin, thinking the Stache was looking at him weird, opted to walk out after only 3 minutes.  El Chango retains his spot and gets the win via countout.  Not quite sure the purpose of all that.

We head to the back where #TeamJones are being interviewed.  The interviewer asks #ConanJ if they are stirring up a bees nest.  “A bees nest....a bees nest...you think these insects mean something to the appex predators......this whole time we’ve just been hibernating....waiting....and now the grizzles are up and hungry....and looking for their first meal...and once we devour the timid little bambis......believe me we will be looking for our next meal....our hunger CANNOT.....WILL NOT be satisfied til we have our biggest meal…the tag team championships........when the belts are around the rightful champions then and only then will this so called wrestling affiliation be a true giant in our industry.....but as long as these has-beens and never-wases keep shielding the fagazzis, we will continue to terrorize when and where we see fit.....”  #CaseyJ looks at the camera and says “What he said.”  They then walk off.

Cactus Jackie makes her way to the ring and she seems all proud of herself.  The fans are booing her and she doesn’t seem to care.  Southern Bell and the rest of the Beautiful People make their way down to the ring.  Belle goes right after Jackie but CJ bails prolonging the start of the match.  This goes on for about 2 minutes until the Beautiful People surround her and make her get back in the ring.  Halfway through the match, the ref sends the rest of the Beautiful People from ringside after they threatened to interfere.  Jackie capitalized on it and while the ref was distracted, he blasts Belle with a foreign object.  She then locks Belle in the Cactus Clutch and Belle has no choice but to tap out.  Jackie gets the win here but continues to keep the hold locked in.  Fusion Valentine runs back down and Jackie releases the hold.  The two of them start to jawjack which gives Belle time to recover.  Belle then hulks up in the ring and starts to wail on Jackie.   Belle connects with a vicious uppercut followed by the Southern Swing.  Jackie then bailed as soon as she could.  Fusion got in the ring and calmed her partner down.  They then left the ring shortly thereafter.

It is time for our main event.  Sheamus’ title spot is on the line here against the Undertaker.  Both men make their way to the ring.  Just as the bell rings, the lights go dim and the eerie blue light shines down and Gong sounds that normally accompany the Undertaker begins to ring.  Bray Wyatt, sitting in his rocking chair, is at the top of the ramp.  Bray begins to laugh.  Bray gets on the mic and tells Undertaker that if he loses, then their match at Wrestlemania is off.   Bray says that he already has to defend the HWF and Undisputed titles at Wrestlemania and feels that he should not have to wrestle a third time.  Undertaker looks put off and Bray seems happy about it.  Undertaker blocks the clubbing fists from Sheamus and hits a Chokeslam. Sheamus connects with a double axe handle smash and Undertaker hits the Last Ride.   Undertaker then locks in the Devil’s Triangle (modified gogoplata) and Sheamus taps out.  All this in 3 minutes.  Undertaker gets the win and is now the #1 contender for Bray’s World title.  Bray stands up on the stage and starts to look concerned as Undertaker drags his thumb across his throat and with mic in hand, says “Rest…in…Peace.”  The lights go out except for a spotlight on the ring reflecting the Wrestlemania logo.   With that, the show comes to an end.


Thanks for reading.  Stick around; things are getting interesting.

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