Monday, July 23, 2018

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2018 #696 – Tacoma Thunder


Hello wrestling fans and welcome back to another installment of HCW’s (the Emmett Millbarge version) (editor’s note:  he demanded we add that part) Tacoma Thunder.  Our show begins once again backstage with Emmett confronting GM Max McGillicutty.   Max tells Emmett that the buyout has not happened and that he really has no authority.  Emmett says “I beg to differ.  In the case of Quid vs Pro Quo, the new party, that’s me, gets complete run of the events and the wrestlers contracts so unless you want me to just start blindlingly firing everyone on the roster, I suggest you take this time to go home and brush up on your resume because in a month’s time, there will be a changing of the guard (he calls a guard over OH GUARD), and WE will be the ultimate power in this universe.  Get it?  Good, now get out.”  Emmett has the guard escort Max out of the building.

Once outside, Max is met by Tacoma’s GM Master Bull and the owners Mr. B and Mr. M.  Everyone agrees that something needs to be done.  Mr. B gives Master Bull a task and Mr. M gives one to Max.  They say that they will keep fighting this on the legal side and that they need Bull and Max to try to stay involved doing whatever it takes.  Bull and Max are then left alone.  Bull says he has an idea and runs it by Max.  Max likes the idea and they start to plan how to implement it.

Pyro goes off and once it’s done, our first match of the night kicks off.  First, visiting from the Phoenix roster is Lavender Gooms.  She makes her way down to the ring to a mixed reaction from the crowd.  Next, smoke fills the stage and then Violet Valkyrie blasts through as she zip lines down to the ring and the fans pop huge for her.  She drops into the ring and climbs the turnbuckles to pops from the crowd.  As the match began, Lavender got in a few shots but then Violet began to make a comeback and owned the match through it’s entirety.  Violet managed to stay a couple of moves ahead of her opponent.  She even locked in a triangle choke trying to get a submission but Lavender was able to make it to the ropes.  Halfway through the match, Violet catches Lavender with a jumping knee smash and goes for the pin but only gets a 2 count.   We now join the match at the 18 minute mark.

===== In the 18th minute of the match: =====

Violet Valkyrie (f) rolled DC

Lavender Gooms (f) rolled OC.

Lavender Gooms (f) executes a SNAP SUPLEX....

Violet Valkyrie (f) reverses SNAP SUPLEX!

Violet Valkyrie (f) executes a EXPLODER SUPLEX....

Lavender Gooms (f) attempts to defend against EXPLODER SUPLEX but is unsuccessful.


Violet Valkyrie (f) is attempting a pin!!!

1...

Lavender Gooms (f) kicks out of the pin!


===== In the 19th minute of the match: =====

Violet Valkyrie (f) rolled OC/TT

Lavender Gooms (f) rolled DC

Violet Valkyrie (f) executes a TRIANGLE CHOKE....

Lavender Gooms (f) reverses TRIANGLE CHOKE!

Lavender Gooms (f) executes a RUNNING LEG DROPS....

Violet Valkyrie (f) attempts to defend against RUNNING LEG DROPS but is unsuccessful.


===== In the 20th minute of the match: =====

Violet Valkyrie (f) rolled OC.

Lavender Gooms (f) rolled OC/TT

Violet Valkyrie (f) executes a RUNNING DOUBLE AXE HANDLE....

Lavender Gooms (f) executes a FOUR-LEG CLOVER LEGLOCK....

After 20 minutes, the match is declared a draw.


Violet has a great showing and even though the match is a draw, she proved to be the better competitor.  Lavender approached her and extended her hand.  Violet shook it much to the fans delight.   All of a sudden, the lights went out and when they came back on, Violet was out cold in the ring and standing over her with a steel chair was Vanilla Zombie!  Vanilla didn’t like seeing, what her perception is, some newbie trying to take away her “spot”.  She glared down at Violet and then turned and left.  She makes it to the top of the ramp and then points backstage and the curtains part and out comes ‘The Singapore Sensation’ Matt Preacher.  It looks like Vanilla has joined Team Preacher and the fans become vocal expressing their displeasure.  The two of them leave.  Eventually the ref and Lavender help Violet from the ring.  (20 min draw)

Backstage, Drew the Canadian Love Machine congratulates the new US Champion Jacques Beannot and then asks for his rematch.  Jacques says that with all due respect, Drew ducked him and didn’t want to give him his shot at glory so he had to take it another way.   Jacques says he would love to give Drew a title match but it’s not a priority for the new owners at this time.  He walks away.

Our next match is ready to go and it’s a challenge for a spot in the tag team title top 10.  First, ‘the Singapore Sensation’ Matt Preacher comes out and brings out Hardcore Hensen and Nix Anderson who are all booed.  Hensen begins to threaten to hit the fans but Preacher reels him in and the three head down to the ring.  Next, Ovaltine Jackson and Ghee Buttersnaps come out and they get a huge pop from the crowd.  They don’t get much time in the ring before Hensen attacks them sending Ghee out of the ring and then blasts Ovaltine with the Hard Times.  Nix then joins him in the ring and the two beat Ovaltine down.   The ref restores order sending Nix out of the ring but that didn’t stop Hensen from reaping more damage.  Ovaltine hits Hensen with a spinebuster and then makes the hot tag to Ghee.   Hensen hits the Hard Times on Ghee and tags out to Nix.  Nix uses Preacher for a distraction but then Hensen wants back in.  Nix makes the tag but is then double teamed by Ghee and Ovaltine.   After Ovaltine left the ring, Hensen rattles Ghee with a kneelift to the jaw.  Stunned, Ghee stumbled in the ring.  Hensen then hits Ghee again with a kneelift to the jaw and this time he makes the cover and gets the uncontested 3 count.   Nix and Hensen get the win and move up in the tag team rankings.  Preacher joins them in the ring and the three celebrate briefly before leaving to the booing from the fans.  (9 min)

Adam Jameson is backstage and he complains to Emmett Milbarge that he barely had any time to celebrate as the US champion and wanted a match tonight. 

The next match begins with Phoenix’s El Gato Negro making her way out to the ring.  She is booed as she enters the ring.  Next, Ruby Rose comes out and the fans pop for her.   Just as she is making her way down to the ring, Vanilla Zombie comes out and tries to attack Ruby but Violet Valkyrie comes out and ends up chasing Vanilla through the crowd.  The match began and Ruby kept the slight advantage through the match.  About 8 minutes in, Ruby goes for a pin after hitting a roundhouse kick but El Gato made it to the ropes.   El Gato turns around and hits the 9 Lives but Ruby kicks out at one.   El Gato comes back a few minutes later and tries for a pin after hitting a Gato Leap but Ruby made it to the ropes.  After a few minutes, El Gato throws Ruby into the corner and charges but Ruby hits the Red Wedding Facebuster.  She goes for the cover and the ref counts 1…2…and just then Vanilla Zombie shows up from under the ring and puts El Gato’s leg on the ropes to stop the count.  Ruby gets up and looks around but she doesn’t see anyone.  She then turns around and gets caught in with the soaring meow (headscissors).  She goes for a pin but Ruby is quick to get her foot on the rope but Vanilla shows up again and knocks it off.  El Gato ends up getting the 3 count much to Ruby’s dismay.  El Gato leaves the ring laughing having secured the #1 contender spot.  Vanilla sneaks up behind Ruby but is caught and just as Vanilla tried to leave, Violet Valkyrie showed up and they cornered Vanilla.  Vanilla looked quizzically at them and just as they charged, she slipped out of the ring and made her way to the back waving at them.  Both Violet and Ruby looked on and weren’t happy but shook hands and the two of them left.  (16 min for the match; 5 extra for the aftermath)

Backstage, ‘the Singapore Sensation’ Matt Preacher confronts Jacques saying that if it wasn’t for him, the US title would not be on Jacques’ waist.  Jacques says that he doesn’t need help.  Preacher says “hear me out” and after offering Jacques a “5 hour energy shot” (which may or may not have been laced with something), Jacques listens intently.  Once Preacher was done, he left Jacques to ponder what he told him.

It’s time to head back to the ring.  Adam Jameson comes out first to a small pop from the crowd.  Next, his opponent – the Russian Ivan Dragovich makes his way out as the fans boo.  Ivan flips off the fans and climbs into the ring.  Ivan goes right on the offensive but Adam has some pent up frustrations after losing the US title right after winning it and he took the match to the Russian.  Ivan went for a pin early but then it was all Adam.  Adam went for 3 pin attempts but Ivan managed to keep kicking out.  Adam began getting psyched up and dropped Ivan with a spin kick.  Adam then hit the ropes and went for a springboard face smash but Ivan managed to reverse it and clobbered AJ with a jumping side kick.  Ivan made the cover and hooked the leg and got the 1-2-3.  Ivan gets the win and has his arm raised.  He beats his chest and the fans boo.  Adam, frustrated at another loss, slams his hands on the mat and then leaves.  (16 min)

Davis Hoffmeister and Magnum Kone are backstage.  Davis says he and Magnum have an opportunity to make history.  He is a multi-time champion and Magnum has carried his fair share of titles.  Magnum says that it is all about opportunity and tonight, they are getting an opportunity that comes rarely.  The one thing in their favor is that the Desperados have not faced the combined might of them.  Davis says that in his “past life”, he teamed and feuded with El Chango so if there is one person on the planet who knows El Chango the best, it is him.  Tonight, the Desperados face their toughest opponents and may the best team win.  Magnum looks at him and says.  “That’s us”.  Davis snickers and shakes his head.

Our next match begins with Superquake Ferguson making his way out to the ring. The fans boo him but he doesn’t care.  Next, the Italian Superman Superstar Chic Monroe comes out to a pop from the crowd and he is joined by his tag team partners the Axe and TNT.  They accompany Chic down to the ring for his match just in case Ferguson goes overboard.  To everyone’s surprise except for maybe Chic himself, he went toe to toe with the giant and actually held his own.  In a huge feat of strength, while the two were fighting outside of the ring, Chic hit a huge powerslam on the floor.  The two made it back in the ring and continued the fight but after Ferguson hit the Cutting Edge, he got a near 2 count and Chic began getting a little worried.  He began to battle back and hit Ferguson with a big boot.  He then hit the ropes but Superquake caught him and after turning him around a couple of times, hit a huge chokeslam.  He laid on top of Chic and being unable to kick out with 400 lbs laying on top of him, Superquake gets the win.  He stands up and holds his arms up in victory.  He then looks at Monroe and contemplates going after him again but the Axe and TNT are in the ring and they make sure nothing else happens.  Ferguson smirks and then walks away.  Axe helps Chic to his feet and they all leave to a nice pop from the crowd.  (8 min)

We cut backstage to a promo from the World Tag Team champions the Desperados.  El Chango says that Davis claims to know him but he’s not letting on is that he knows Davis.  Leon says that he replaced the one-time ‘Stache’ and he only made the Desperados even better.  They have been more successful and after defeating Davis and Magnum, they will solidify their standing as one of the best tag teams ever.  El Chango says that teams come and go but he and Leon aren’t going anywhere.  They’ll prove that right now.  Both men head to the ring.

It’s time for our main event.  First, the challengers Davis ‘the Hoff’ Hoffmeister and Magnum ‘king of cones’ Kone make their way out to a huge pop from the crowd.  Magnum gave out ice cream to the fans at ringside and once that was completed, he joined Davis in the ring.  Next, the music changed and out comes the champs the Desperados.  El Chango and Leon Teremoto make their way out to an equally loud pop from the fans.  They get in the ring and hold the titles high.  All 4 men make it to the center of the ring and have a staredown as the ref takes the belts, holds them up and then hands them to the attendant.  The bell rings and this one begins.  El Chango begins with hitting Davis with a spear.  Leon is tagged in and hits Davis with a dropkick.  The Desperados hit the ring for double team action.  After they were done, Leon hits Davis with a spinebuster and goes for the pin but Davis kicks out at 2.   Davis hits a clothesline but eats a second spinebuster.  El Chango hits the ring knocking Magnum off the ring.  Davis tries for a tag but his partner isn’t there.  Leon drags him back to the center of the ring.  Davis hits Leon with a roundhouse kick but ends up getting double teamed.  After El Chango was sent out of the ring, Davis started to choke Leon but that was reversed and Leon grabbed a handful of hair and pulled Davis down to the mat.  He made the cover and with a hook of the leg (and maybe some tights?), he got the 1-2-3.  The Desperados get the win and retain the titles.  The show comes to an end with El Chango and Leon holding their titles high as the fans pop for them.

Stay tuned.  More to come.

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