Monday, March 5, 2018

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2018 #654 – Tacoma Thunder



Hello fans and welcome back to our newsletter.  Our new temporary GM the Ragin Cajun King Rad Gumbo has not provided any sort of lineup for the day so the ENTIRE Tacoma roster showed up.  I think this is what the new GM wanted.  He actually began the show by making his way out to the ring (there are his and hers thrones set up) accompanied by his Queen Ms. Alexandria.  They walk down to the ring doing (what he calls) the peasant wave.  They enter the ring and sit on their thrones.   King Rad then calls out the entire roster and they come out (men and ladies) and they all stand on the stage. 



“My loyal subjects…Your King and Queen have asked you here to show to one and all that we are benevolent and will treat you right.  Now, with that said, there is a show to run and we will need you, our Tacoma Roster, to band together to put on a show like no other.  Tonight, I ask for volunteers to represent our great roster and show me and my queen why you are worthy to be on the same roster as us.”  There is unrest among the roster and the fans start booing Rad.  “Now now mah subjects, don’t be dat way.  Your King expects loyalty and respect and I’ll be DAMNED if you start to turn against me.  If you won’t volunteer, I’ll make you work or you can hit the unemployment line.  I will call out a list of names and ah want you to step forward.



El Chango

Leon Teremoto

Mustang Sammy

Drew da Canadian Love Machine

Da Duchess

Candice Charisma

Davis da Hoff

Ghee Buttersnaps

Ovaltine Jackson

Bad News Marvin Barnes

Lexy Flexx

Lady Hermann

Magnum Kone

Dr Red Fang

Red McNulty



His lordship takes a breath as the wrestlers he’s called out step forward.  “Now, all of you will be wrestling tonight and I’ll be making up the card as soon as I get back to mah office.  The rest of you are dismissed.  The roster begins to walk away but not before “Red Hot” Lucas Johnston comes out and walks down to the ring.  He enters much to the dismay of the King.  “What do you want, boy?” Gumbo states.  Lucas points to a lot of the signs in the audience – the one he settles on is “Lucas got screwed”.  The fans pop loud for him.  Lucas snatches the mic away from Gumbo.  “This Boy should be king and not you.  But I’m not one to cry over spilled milk so you think that you deserve the crown…prove it.  Me and you…one on one.”  Gumbo snatches the mic back.  “I’ve got nothing to prove to you and besides, you can’t fight me as I have not declared it.  Besides, you’re not cleared to return to action (I have not allowed it) so you can just go home right now.”  Lucas then grabs Rad by the robe but before he could do anything, Phoenix GM Master Bull came out. “Hold it.  Lucas, let him go.”  Bull gets into the ring.  “I understand your frustration but you don’t want to start off by putting your hands on the GM.  Go ahead and take off and we can address it later.”  Lucas turns and leaves.  Bull continues “Don’t let the power get to your head, Gumbo.  I am the senior GM until Max returns and we won’t have an abuse of power.  Oh, by the way, since you picked Red McNulty for action tonight, he’ll defend the title against Leiton Snake who just so happens to be backstage.” Gumbo is furious at the interruption “You can’t tell me how to run my organization so you are not welcome here.  Security, escort this man off campus.”  Security comes out (dressed as royal guards) and leads Master Bull to the back.  Gumbo finishes with “We will have a video montage playing of mah win of the crown while I go back to mah office.”  Gumbo and Queen Alexandria leave to the fans really booing them but he doesn’t care.



A video plays (much longer than it needed to be) of Gumbo’s win of the crown at the Reigning Royalty PPV as well as the dismissing of MJ as his manager from the following night (all cut and edited to make Gumbo look superior). 



Once the video ended, we cut backstage where El Chango and Leon Teremoto are talking and they agree to reform the Desperados.  El Chango says he’s tired of getting screwed over and Leon was outright robbed of the Hardcore title.  They were dominant as tag champs before and they will be again.



Gumbo then releases the lineup for today’s show.



The Desperados vs Ghee and Ovaltine

Bad News Marvin Barnes vs Davis Hoffmeister

Mustang Sammy vs Drew the Canadian Love Machine

The Duchess and Lady Hermann vs Candice Charisma & Lexy Flexx

Magnum Kone vs Dr. Red Fang

Red McNulty vs Leiton Snake for the hardcore title



The show begins with fan favorites Ghee Buttersnaps and Ovaltine Jackson making their way out to the ring.  Next, music we haven’t heard in a long time plays and out comes the Desperados – El Chango and Leon Teremoto.  The fans who remembered them popped but the younger fans weren’t familiar with them so they were pretty stoic.  The match started off pretty even although it took El Chango and Leon Teremoto a while to get used to being back in tag team action. The fans eventually cheered for both teams but for some reason, King Rad’s lackey Superquake Ferguson came out.  He made his way down to the ring and stood at ringside.  When the ref went over to question what he was doing there,  He produced a piece of paper that he looked over and then shrugged his shoulders.  The match continued and as time was running out, Superquake decided to get involved.  He ended up pulling Leon out of the ring and then hit a chokeslam on Leon sending him down hard on the mat.  The ref didn’t do anything.  Ghee hits some pectoral chops on El Chango but Superquake reached in and hit El Chango with a knockout punch.  El Chango drops to the mat.  Ghee looks confused but makes the cover and gets the 1-2-3.  Ghee and Ovaltine get the win.  They still seem confused even when Superquake gets in the ring.  He walks over to Ovaltine and NAILS him with a knockout punch. He turns to Ghee who tried to flee but Superquake picked him up and hit a HUGE backbreaker.  Superquake then departed leaving the carnage behind him.  Eventually all 4 men made their way to the back. (20 min for the match; 5 extra for the additional segment)



Candice Charisma gloats about taking out the Duchess and the Ladies Champion Ravishing Raquel.  She holds (and already signed) the #1 contenders contract so once Raquel is out of the hospital, she will cash in her contract.



Our second match is ready to begin.  First, Davis ‘the Hoff’ Hoffmeister comes out to a HUGE pop from the crowd.   Davis gets into the ring but his time to celebrate is cut short when we hear “I’ve got some bad news for ya” and out comes ‘Bad News’ Marvin Barnes.  The crowd boos him as he makes his way down to the ring.  Davis begins with trying for a monkey flip but Marvin reverses it and hits a Star Effect Sitout side slam.  He then stands over Davis laughing.  Davis is up and nails Marvin with a piledriver.  He goes for the pin but Marvin kicks out at two.  Davis stands over Marvin, picks him up again and hits another piledriver.  He makes the cover and this time gets the 3 count.  Davis Hoffmeister gets the win in just 3 minutes.  Davis celebrates briefly before heading to the back.  He makes it to the stage and pumps his arms in the air and turns…right into a KNOCKOUT PUNCH from Superquake Ferguson.  Davis is out cold.  Superquake leaves.  Davis is helped up and makes his way backstage.



The Duchess is backstage with Lady Hermann and she says that Candice is off her rocker.   She says that the wacko needs some serious help as she’s delusional with violence tendencies.  Lady Hermann says that when they hurt someone, there is purpose behind it.  Candice has none.  It goes to show that some people on the roster (Lexy Flexx) has no idea what she’s getting herself into teaming with Candice but they will show her tonight.



The next match begins with Drew the Canadian Love Machine making his way out and the pop he gets is just as loud as what Davis got.  Next, manager Figaroa Newton comes out and the fans start a “Figgy…Figgy” chant and that just pisses him off.  Next, Mustang Sammy comes out and the fans boo as he and Figgy (sorry, we just can’t call him Figaroa anymore) head down to the ring.  Figgy directs Sammy to go on the offensive and he attacks Drew but the former World Champion held him off successfully.   At the 10 minute mark, Drew hits Sammy with a superkick knocking him out.  Figgy then jumped onto Drew’s back resulting in a DQ.    Drew gets the win although it wasn’t as he had hoped.  Mustang Sammy then got up and he and hit Drew with a steel chair.  He held Drew down until Superquake Ferguson came out again.  Ferguson handed a stuffed envelope to Figgy and then he picked up and locked him in a torture rack backbreaker.  He held Drew in it until Drew had passed out.  He then dropped Drew and then left.



We cut to the GM’s office where King Rad Gumbo and Queen Alexandria are talking about the show.  Superquake walks in and Rad tell his “well done” and Ferguson went to stand in the corner waiting to be used again.  The segment ends with Rad laughing.



The next match is ready to go.  First, Candice Charisma and Lexy Flexx come out and are booed.  Next, the Duchess and Lady Hermann come out but their reception is a bit better than their opponents.  Candice is pacing in the ring like a caged tiger.   Once all 4 ladies were in the ring, the match began.  Candice and Lexy took the fight to the royals but after 15 minutes, the royals began to beat the snot out of their opponents and had an offensive run that went practically 14 minutes.   As the match began to wind down, Lexy tagged herself in and Candice grumpily left the ring.  Lexy connected with a hurricanrana on Lady Hermann and then showboated before going for the pin.  She made the cover but the bell rang before this one could end.  The match ends in a draw.  The Duchess and Lady Hermann left the ring.  Candice climbed back in and began yelling at Lexy.  Lexy tried to blow her off but Candice attacked her hitting a facebuster.  She stomped on Lexy all the while yelling at her.  After the final stomp, she stormed out of the ring.  Lexy had to be helped to the back.  Candice just seems to be making “friends” everywhere she goes.



We cut to the back again to Rad’s office and he makes the comment that the Duchess and Lady Hermann are using the term “royals” and as they are not officially part of their royal family, that will need to stop.  Queen Alexandria jots some stuff down in a notebook.



We go back to the ring and we hear “VAMPIRE LUNGES FOR EVERYONE” and out comes Dr. Red Fang and his manager Ant Graham.  They are booed heavily as they make their way down to the ring.  Next, we hear the familiar bell ring of the ice cream cart as Magnum Kone makes his way down.  He stops along the way to hand out treats to the kids.  Magnum eventually gets in to the ring and the fans cheer him on.  As normal, Graham interfered and almost got Fang disqualified but the ref let it slide.  Magnum knocked Graham out and then took the match to Fang.  The evil vampire couldn’t stop the onslaught without his manager by his side.  Magnum finally hit Fang with the Bomb Pop (power clothesline) and he covered Fang for the 1-2-3.  Magnum Kone gets the win.  As Magnum makes his way up the ramp, Superquake Ferguson comes out again and stands in his way.  Magnum tries to push Ferguson out of the way but the immovable object isn’t budging.  Magnum warns Superquake to move but he doesn’t. Magnum slugs Superquake to no avail.  Ferguson slugs Magnum and he shrugs it off.  The two begin pounding on each other and it ends up taking about 12 people to break it up.  Neither man gave an inch. It will be interesting to see where they go from there.



GM King Rad was watching the confrontation between Superquake and Magnum Kone and he was really surprised Magnum didn’t fall like the rest.  “Hmm, we’re going to have to work on dat”.



It’s time for the Main Event.  First, Leiton Snake and his Snake Pit brothers (Niven & Tobias) come out and do the fist bump with Leiton before he heads down to the ring.  Next, the Hardcore Champion Red McNulty comes out and is booed as he makes his way to the ring.  He hands over the title and is then asked what type of rules he wanted for this match.  Red replied with “Texas Death”.  Red immediately attacks Leiton but it’s reversed and Leiton hit the Sling Blade sending Red into the steel post busting him open.  Leiton continues to kick Red’s ass but Red removes his eye patch and begins to choke Leiton with it.  Niven Snake runs down and slides a steel chair into the ring. Leiton wiggles out of a bodyslam and hits a pedigree facebuster onto the steel chair.  Red is out cold.  Leiton makes the cover and the ref counts 1…2…3.  Leiton Snake is the NEW HARDCORE CHAMPION!  Leiton holds the title high but his celebration is interrupted by GM King Rad Gumbo who is accompanied by Superquake Ferguson.  King Rad sends Ferguson down to the ring to conduct business.  In from the crowd comes Niven and Tobias Snake and they stand with Leiton.  Ferguson looks to the King who makes a motion and Ferguson attacks the entire Snake Pit.  As big as he is though, the numbers overwhelm him.  Just when you thought Superquake was down and out, he exploded up sending the members of the Pit flying.  He grabbed Niven and hurled him over the top rope.  As Niven struggled to his feet, he looked up just in time to see Tobias flying right at him.  The two crashed and fell to the ground.  Superquake then picked up Leiton and hit 3 chokeslams.  He finished him off with a Cutting Edge.  King Rad got on the mic and then announced that Superquake was the #1 contender to the Hardcore title and that he is making this the final match of the night.  The bell rings and Superquake dominates the new champ.  After beating him senseless for 5 minutes, he sends Leiton to the ropes and then levels him with a big foot to the face.  Ferguson makes the cover and gets the 3 count.  Superquake Ferguson is the NEW HARDCORE CHAMPION!  King Rad joins him in the ring along with Queen Alexandria and the 3 celebrate as the show comes to an end. 



I’m sure there will be some serious repercussions moving forward so stay tuned.



Here is a preview of the next show:





Phoenix Heat House Show

Phoenix, AZ

March 7, 2018 - 5:00 PM



The loser is traded to Tacoma

20 Minute Time Limit




Jesse California
VS.
Wolfman Keg
with Ant Graham



30 Minute Time Limit




Baron Von Blood (Reinhardt Schmitt)
Iron Cross (Oswald Zimmerman)
Karl Braun
VS.
Wilber Townsend
ScooterJ
Otto Ruthless



20 Minute Time Limit




Buzz Steel
VS.
Talon McFrost



Elimination Chamber Qualifier

20 Minute Time Limit




The Unknown Assassin
with Honorable J C Dykes
VS.
Biceps Bannerman



20 Minute Time Limit




Taylor Bella (f)
with Figaroa 'Figgy' Newton
VS.
Missy Chick (f)



For the World Tag Team Titles

30 Minute Time Limit




"The Elitist" Reid Rothchild
Roderick Rothchild
with The Ambassador
VS.
Smasher #1
Smasher #2


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