Wednesday, September 18, 2019

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2019 #795 – Phoenix Heat (09/18)


Hello fans and welcome back.  Well, we enjoyed our nice hiatus and the roster is all refreshed and ready to kick things off. 

The Supershow which aired right before the PPV saw the following results:

·       Ice Dagger defeats Magnum Kone

·       Killa Pops defeated Tommy Lightning

·       Maxine DeVito defeats Kimberly Kiccsass

·       Jack Lumber defeats the Axe but Axe attacks him after the match.

·       El Chango defeated Col. Flagg



We are introduced to “the Lumber Lounge”. Entrance to the Lumber Lounge:

·       $20 or

·       $15 if you wear a flannel or

·       $10 if you bring a friend AND wear a flannel



·       Davis Hoffmeister defeats the Banker

·       Iron Sheik attacked and potentially injured Rad Gumbo.


As a recap from the PPV,

·       Wilber Townsend, Leon Teremoto and Anthony Boom defeated the Steel Curtain & Biceps Bannerman to become the NEW 6 Man Tag Team Champions.

·       Drew the Canadian Love Machine retained the TV title in his match against Master Bull.

·       Dr Red Fang retained the Hardcore title against Nix Anderson.

·       Wicket Prophet defeated Otto Ruthless to retain the US title.

·       Maximillian Redbeard and Superquake Ferguson defeated Mean Jack Mason & Angry Jack Lawson to become the NEW WORLD TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS.

·       Texas Wildfire retained the World Title against Apollo Gyze.

·       After signing a non-liable clause for his match, The Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo defeated the Iron Sheik in a Persian Death Match; only to be taken out after tripping over a cat scratching post back stage.  Rad Gumbo ended up breaking his ankle and will be out the rest of the year.  I’m sure he’ll have words for Apollo (who left shit laying around) upon his return.

·       Hayley Hailstorm defeated Violet Valkyrie to become the NEW LADIES CHAMPION.


Pyro goes off to kick off the show and that brings out Phoenix Heat GM Ruth Heartless.  The crowd boos her as she tries to get a word in.  She finally gets an opening and after a dig at both the AZ Cardinals and the AZ Diamondbacks (which drew more heat from the crowd), she made some announcements.


“First off you ungrateful bunch of snobs, I was given an opportunity by the owners of HCW to take on a new wrestler for my roster or trade him to Tacoma in favor of someone on the roster there.  Well, Tacoma, you get “The Masked Banana”.  Enjoy.  I on the other hand am taking back someone who should never have left.”  Music hits and out comes the Banker.  “Ruth, thank you for making this happen.  First, that Tacoma is such a stinkpit (referring to the alleged ‘Tacoma Aroma’) and I couldn’t wait to get out of there.  Second, I saw that the Heat show was taking a nosedive and needed someone of my caliber back on the show.  Ratings will surely soar now.”  Ruth tells him he will have to wrestle tonight and he says he’ll go get ready and heads to the back.  Ruth continues.  “Also tonight, we are rolling out a brand new title.  We have graciously extended an offer to wrestlers on both teams including the women to come and wrestle for this new belt.  The title will be called the “Anytime/Anywhere” Championship and can and will have to be defended at a moment’s notice.  Anyone can win it if they have the know how to make it happen.  That battle royal will take place tonight with the new champion being crowned before the end of the show.  With that, let’s get this show moving.”  She leaves and the fans applaud (because she finally left).


Our first match of the evening continues the feud between these two teams.  First, the Snake Pit (Leiton, Niven and Tobias Snake) all come out to a small pop from the crowd.  The 3 enter the ring and put their collective fists together for a fist bump.  The music changes and the fans boo as the 5th Column (Baron von Blood, Karl Braun & Oswald Zimmerman) come out.  The Column flip off the crowd which just infurates them all the more.  Baron gets in the ring and calls out Leiton for hiding behind the Pit.  Leiton basically does the same to Baron for hiding behind the Column.  Baron says that the two of them should do this one on one with their teammates only coming in for double or triple teaming.  Leiton agreed.  The bell rang and Leiton almost scored a near fall after hitting a Curb stomp 2 minutes in.   The Column then jumped Leiton giving Baron a chance to recover.  Twice during the match, we saw all 6 men in the ring but for the entire time, neither Baron nor Leiton tagged out.  The Snake Pit clearly had the advantage during the match but Baron was able to capitalize when Leiton went for an enzuiguri but missed.  Baron locked in the Gas Chamber (sleeper) and while Oswald and Karl took out the rest of the pit, the ref checked on Leiton picking up his arm and dropping it once, twice, three times.  He calls for the bell and awards the match to the 5th Column via submission.  Baron refuses to relinquish the hold.  The ref threatens to reverse the decision and Baron finally lets go once Niven and Tobias hit the ring armed with steel chairs.  Baron von Blood bolts out of the ring and he and the rest of the Column celebrate their win.  I’m sure the Snake Pit will not be letting this go.  (12 min)


The former tag team champions Mean Jack Mason and Angry Jack Lawson are backstage.  Mason issues a challenge to the Steel Curtain for the briefcase which contains a contract to meet for the Tag Team titles.    Buzz and Starbuck Steel walk in and they say that they accept.  A brief brawl ensues but is quickly squashed.


We go back to the ring for our next match.  First, Travis ‘Dark Storm’ Ryzing comes out to a nice pop from the crowd.  Once in the ring, the music changed and the fans boo as the Banker makes his way out.  He makes his way to the ring and puts his briefcase next to the steel post.  He gets in and attacks Travis.  The two men battled for the entire 20 minute match but with no pin or submission attempted, the match ended on a draw.  The Banker was not happy about that and attacked Travis with the briefcase.  The Banker then hit a Deposit diving DDT on Travis right on the briefcase putting a huge dent into it.  The Banker saw his briefcase with the huge dent in it and went right back to beating Travis down.  A bunch of people from backstage came out and forced the Banker to the back.  Travis was helped to the back.  (20 min draw)


Hardcore Champion Dr. Red Fang is backstage with his manager the Ambassador.  The Ambassador blasts Nix Anderson for being a poor sport after he completely failed against the diabolical vampire.  The Ambassador promises that Nix will “never….eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever get another shot at this title unless….Fang and I want you gone so I propose one more match but this time, if (and when) you lose Nix, you are out of HCW. Those are the terms.  Take it, or leave it.”  The Ambassador and Fang walk off camera.


The next match is to determine who gets the next title match against the Tag Team Champions.  First, the challengers Mean Jack Mason and Angry Jack Lawson come out first and they are booed all the way to the ring.  They would grab random signs and tear them up before throwing the pieces back at the fans.  They got in the ring and jawjacked with the crowd until the music changed and the fans popped HUGE as the Steel Curtain (Buzz and Starbuck Steel) came out carrying their briefcase.  They interact with the fans and make their way into the ring.  There is very little down time as the match begins right away at the insistence of the Steel Curtain.  The 4 men brawled all over the ring with random pins attempted but nothing was successful.  The match went on right up to the last minute of the match.  As we entered the final minute of the match, the Curtain were in total control but the Jacks jumped in.  Buzz joined in and he and Starbuck hurled the Jacks at each other and they crashed in the center of the ring.  Angry Jack fell down and rolled out of the ring.  Starbuck hit the ropes and nailed an Out of this World dropkick on Mason.  He rolled Mean Jack up and with seconds to spare, he got the 1-2-3.  The Steel Curtain are victorious and retain their spot as the #1 contenders to the Tag Champs.  Mean Jack and Angry Jack stormed to the back pissed off.  (30 min)


Smarting their loss tonight, the Jacks arrive backstage and they just snap.  They attack and beat up a couple of security guards with Mean Jack causing most of the ruckus.  GM Ruth Heartless arrives on the scene and says that this is totally uncalled for and suspends the team.  Mean Jack grabs his bag and walks out the back door never turning around.


It’s time for our match for the Hardcore title.  First, the challenger Ghee Buttersnaps comes out to a pop from the crowd.  After he arrives in the ring, the loudspeakers blare “VAMPIRE LUNGES FOR EVERYONE” and out comes the champion Dr. Red Fang accompanied by his manager the Ambassador and the two head to the ring amid the boos and hisses from the crowd.  Fang gets in the ring and looks to the Ambassador who announces the match rules will be “Brass knuckles”.  Fang goes right on the offensive.  Fang is first to get the brass knucks and he delivers a punch to Ghee’s gut.  Ghee gets a shot in when he uses the foreign object to smack Fang across the bridge of the nose.  This move incapacitated the champ and Ghee took control but Fang eventually got back into the action.  Ghee locks in a bearhug but Fang won’t quit.  Fang goes for his knucks again but Ghee kicks them into the crowd giving some lucky fan a bloody souvenir.   The next thing we hear is the bell signaling the end of the match.  This one ended in a draw.  Fang retains his title but leaves fairly quickly.  (20 min draw)


It is now time for our main event and most of the participants in the battle royal to determine who will become the first ever Anytime/Anywhere champion goes off with men and women alike storming the ring and bodies flying over the top rope just as fast as new ones could enter.  This went on for almost an hour when it finally came down to the last two competitors… Master Bull and ‘Sassy’ Maxine DeVito.  After a little back and forth, Bull drops Maxine with a one armed chokeslam but Maxine pops up and grabs Bull by the trunks and hurls him over the top rope.  The bell rings signaling the end of the match and with that, Maxine becomes the first ever Anytime/Anywhere Champion.  She holds the title high and the fans boo.  She smirks and heads to the back.  Just then, a small group of wrestlers immediately went after her to try to get a pin or submission to take the title but Maxine had just enough of a lead that she was able to exit the building, hop into a waiting car and take off.


With that, the show comes to an end.  Stay tuned for more action.

No comments:

Post a Comment