Sunday, April 22, 2018

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2018 #670 – PPV Fallout – Tacoma Thunder


Hello fans and welcome back to our newsletter.  Well, the roster and the rest of us got a well-deserved break and are now ready to get back into action.  We have quite a bit of news that is part of the fallout from the Critical Mass PPV and that begins with those retiring from HCW.  The only one who was forced into retirement as a stipulation of his match was Phat Sol.  He has asked to address the Phoenix fans on Wednesday so that will be taking place then.  Even after the break, the following people have decided this isn’t what they wanted anymore.

Hangman #3
Pete Punsher
Figgy Newton (the beating he received at the hands of Davis Hoffmeister was enough for him to call it quits)
Mustang Sammy (by default, with Figgy gone, so is he)
Lexy Flexx

Next, as the GM predicted, there was a roster shake up to make room for new people joining us.  Tacoma GM Max McGillicutty agreed to bring on all the new wresters for his show and some made the move down to Phoenix.  Those existing on the roster that were affected included:

Lavender Gooms
Muscles McGuire
Muscles Thorpe
Muscles Weasley
Madame Jade

The shocker was King Rad Gumbo being moved to Phoenix but it was without Superquake so he and his Queen will have to fend for themselves.

With that, Tacoma Thunder is proud to introduce 5 new characters:

Nix Anderson – he hails from the mean streets of Ukulele, Germany (apparently he got beat up by bullies for being from a town called Ukulele so he in turn became a bully and figured the best place to do that would be in a wrestling ring)

Jacques Beannot (brought in by Drew the Canadian Love Machine).  Jacques also hails from Montreal along with Drew.  Drew says he discover Jacques in a gym after a hard days work pounding on a computer.  Drew calls his specialty move “the Spreadsheet”.

Hardcore Hensen is a former military instructor who, like Nix, wanted to beat people up for a living but actually get paid for it and not be arrested for assault and battery.  Anytime he was asked a question, his response was always the same…“BECAUSE I’M HARDCORE!”

Vanilla Zombie – this was the mysterious blonde woman who attacked Kimberly Kiccsass after her battle royal win.  She wears zombie like makeup and always asks “Why”.  When prompted with “Why what?” she would just stare at them with wide eyes.

Finally, we have ‘Short but Vicious’ Ruby Rose.  We learned that Ruby trained at the same facility as hall of fame member the Southern Belle and is out to prove never to underestimate someone based on their size.

All 5 competitors will be in action tonight but Jacques will be teaming with Drew in tag team action. 

After the PPV, the Axe’s tag team partner Brick had approached Scooter J to mock him about his loss to the Axe.  Today, Scooter J went to GM Max McGillicutty and demanded a loser leaves town match.  Max says it will be tonight’s main event but warns Scooter J that if he loses, he is out for good and not just on a vacation.

Also, after the PPV, King Rad Gumbo announced he would be cashing in his title shot against the new World Champion Buzz Steel.

Outback Oscar discussed it with his tag team partner the Crocodile Hunter and they will be going after tag belts.

The new Tag Team Champs the Desperados (El Chango & Leon Teremoto) commented about Elitism’s heel turn.  El Chango calls them sore losers and Leon says that this is their time and if Elitism wants a rematch, they will give them one and send them packing.

Tonight’s Card Line up looks like this:


Tacoma Thunder House Show
Tacoma, WA
April 22, 2018




20 Minute Time Limit

Nix Anderson
VS.
Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude)




45 Minute Time Limit


Drew the Canadian Love Machine
Jacques Beannot
VS.
Outback Oscar
The Crocodile Hunter




BECAUSE IT'S HARDCORE!
Brass Knuckles
No Count Out/No DQ
 20 Minute Time Limit


HARDCORE HENSEN
VS.
Superquake Ferguson




20 Minute Time Limit



Vanilla Zombie (f)
VS.
Lady Hermann (f)




20 Minute Time Limit


Short but Vicious Ruby Rose (f)
VS.
Betsy Cummings (f)




Loser leaves HCW
Thumbtack Deathmatch
 No Count Out/No DQ
30 Minute Time Limit


ScooterJ
VS.
Brick


After pyro goes off again, our show kicks off.  First, Dude USA Mick Rude comes out to a pop from the crowd.   Once in the ring, new music hits and out comes Nix Anderson.  Nix heads to the ring and has a bag with him.  Once in the ring, he opens the bag and takes out his Ukulele.  He begins playing it and trying to sing at the same time and the fans are vocal in their not wanting to hear him wail and screech.  He gets mad as his mini concert is interrupted so he immediately attacks Rude.  The match was a lot closer than we expected with Nix holding his own against Dude USA.  The fans would do a “USA…USA” chant and that infuriated Nix.  He would try to turn up the viciousness but Mick stayed right with him.  As the match was nearing the time limit, both men began to slow down.  We join the match now at the 18 minute mark.


===== In the 18th minute of the match: =====

Nix Anderson rolled OC.

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) rolled OC.

Nix Anderson executes a THROW THRU ROPES....

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) executes a HEADLOCK....

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) is on the outside.  The ref begins the count.

1...2...3...4...5...6...

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) makes it back into the ring at the 6 count.


===== In the 19th minute of the match: =====

Nix Anderson rolled OC/TT

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) rolled OC.

Nix Anderson executes a SWINGING NECKBREAKER....

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) executes a SINGLE LEG TAKEDOWN....


===== In the 20th minute of the match: =====

Nix Anderson rolled OC.

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) rolled DC

Nix Anderson executes a RINGROPE FACE BURN....

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) absorbs the punishment.

Nix Anderson is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude) was pinned by Nix Anderson!!!


Nix Anderson wins with a RINGROPE FACE BURN over Dude U.S.A. (Mick Rude)!!!


Nix celebrates his first win in HCW and the fans voice their displeasure.  He says he’s going to play them a song to “soothe the savage beast” but then changes his mind and walks to the back. 

Backstage, the US Champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine is with his new protégé Jacques Beannot.  Drew tells Jacques that HCW is the best place to wrestle and everyone gets a fair shake.  Jacques thanks Drew for getting him the interview and looks forward to performing in front of the crowd.  He says that once he connects with the Spreadsheet, no filter or vlookup will save them.  Drew looks at him funny.

Our next match kicks off with Outback Oscar and the Crocodile Hunter making their way out.  The fans pop for both as they make their way down and into the ring.  Next, the music changes and Drew and Jacques make their way out.  The fans pop for the duo as they make their way down to the ring.   The four men shake hands as this one gets ready to go.  For the first 5 minutes of the match, Drew and Jacques struggled to find their rhythm but as soon as they hit a double team for the first time, it clicked and the two owned the match.  Oscar and Croc were able to break up any pin or submission attempts consistently.   At one point, Jacques had Oscar locked in the Spreadsheet but just before Oscar would tap, Croc ran in to knock him out of the ring.  We join the match at the 26 minute mark.

===== In the 26th minute of the match: =====

(Jacques and Drew had been double teaming for one round already)

Drew the Canadian Love Machine rolled OC.

Jacques Beannot rolled OC.

Outback Oscar rolled DC

Drew the Canadian Love Machine is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Drew the Canadian Love Machine executes a CORKSCREW PESCADO....

Jacques Beannot is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Jacques Beannot executes a FLYING FIVEARM....

Outback Oscar attempts to defend against Double Teaming. but is unsuccessful.

Double teaming ends.


===== In the 27th minute of the match: =====

Jacques Beannot rolled OC.

Outback Oscar rolled DC

Jacques Beannot executes a SIDE HEADLOCK....

Outback Oscar attempts to defend against SIDE HEADLOCK but is unsuccessful.


===== In the 28th minute of the match: =====

Jacques Beannot rolled OC.

Outback Oscar rolled OC.

Jacques Beannot executes a FLYING BODYPRESS....

Outback Oscar executes a FULL NELSON FACE SMASH....

Jacques Beannot is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Outback Oscar was pinned by Jacques Beannot!!!


Jacques Beannot wins with a FLYING BODYPRESS over Outback Oscar!!!


Drew and Jacques are victorious and looked great in their first outing as a tag team.  Jacques was all happy to have gotten the pin and seemed to hog the spotlight.  Drew let him and clapped for his friend.

We cut to the back where another newbie is being interviewed.  HARDCORE HENSEN is asked numerous questions and he answers them all with “BECAUSE I’M HARDCORE”.  The interviewer eventually gives up and Hensen yells as the camera until it goes dark.

Former Hardcore champion Superquake Ferguson comes out first and is booed.  Everyone seem to be happy that, not only did Superquake lose the title to Magnum Kone, but all the people that Ferguson screwed over in his quest for the title came back to bite him hard.  Superquake motions that he’s going to break his opponent tonight.  Music changes (it sounds like something from Motorhead or something) and out comes the ex-military man Hardcore Hensen.  Hensen gets in the ring and screams “BECAUSE I’M HARDCORE” at no one in particular.  The ref gets ready to start the match but Hensen tells them that, because he is hardcore, he wants hardcore rules.  The ref shrugs and makes it so with Brass Knuckles rules.  Superquake Ferguson started off the match pretty strong but then Hensen began beating the snot out of the giant.  It wasn’t that Superquake wasn’t trying; it was because Hensen was strong.  We join the match at the 8 minute mark.


===== In the 8th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled DC

Superquake Ferguson rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson executes a EYE RAKE....

HARDCORE HENSEN reverses EYE RAKE!

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a STIFF CHAIR SHOT....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against STIFF CHAIR SHOT but is unsuccessful.


===== In the 9th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a KICK FOE'S KNUCKS INTO CROWD....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against KICK FOE'S KNUCKS INTO CROWD but is unsuccessful.

Superquake Ferguson is on defense for 10 more rounds.

===== In the 10th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a HARD TIMES....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against HARD TIMES but is unsuccessful.

HARDCORE HENSEN is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...

Superquake Ferguson kicks out of the pin!

Superquake Ferguson is on defense for 9 more rounds.


===== In the 11th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a BRASS KNUCKLE THRUST TO CHEST....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against BRASS KNUCKLE THRUST TO CHEST but is unsuccessful.

HARDCORE HENSEN is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...

Superquake Ferguson kicks out of the pin!


Superquake Ferguson is on defense for 8 more rounds.


===== In the 12th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a HARD TIMES....

Superquake Ferguson absorbs the punishment.

HARDCORE HENSEN is attempting a pin!!!

1...

Superquake Ferguson kicks out of the pin!

Superquake Ferguson is on defense for 7 more rounds.


===== In the 13th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a STIFF CHAIR SHOT....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against STIFF CHAIR SHOT but is unsuccessful.

Superquake Ferguson is on defense for 6 more rounds.


===== In the 14th minute of the match: =====

HARDCORE HENSEN rolled OC.

Superquake Ferguson rolled DC

HARDCORE HENSEN executes a BRASS KNUCKLE TO FACE....

Superquake Ferguson attempts to defend against BRASS KNUCKLE TO FACE but is unsuccessful.

HARDCORE HENSEN is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Superquake Ferguson was pinned by HARDCORE HENSEN!!!


HARDCORE HENSEN wins with a BRASS KNUCKLE TO FACE over Superquake Ferguson!!!


Hardcore Hensen gets the win in dominating fashion and stands over the bloody form of his opponent.  He yells some more but then eventually leaves.  Damn, that’s a lot of blood.  Superquake is taken from the ring on a stretcher (it took 6 people to get him to the back).

Lady Hermann is backstage and is asked about her opponent tonight Vanilla Zombie.  She says she tried to do the research on her but couldn’t find any details.  Vanilla walks in and just stares at Lady Hermann.  Vanilla asks “why?” and Lady Herman replies with “Why what?”  There is no answer and her ladyship gets frustrated and walks off.  A smile creeps up on Vanilla Zombie’s face and she too walks off.

Lady Hermann makes her way out to a mixed reaction from the crowd.  Next, Vanilla Zombie comes out and the fans surprisingly pop for her.  She’s taken aback by the acceptance from the crowd and as she walks down to the ring, she passes some fans wearing zombie like makeup too.  She stops in front of them and tilts her head and then turns and heads to the ring.  The bell rings pretty fast and Lady Hermann goes on an offensive run that lasts until Vanilla Zombie drops her with a headbutt that stops her in her tracks.  We join the match at the 7 minute mark.

===== In the 7th minute of the match: =====

Lady Hermann (f) rolled DC

Vanilla Zombie (f) rolled OC.

Vanilla Zombie (f) executes a Foreign Object....

Lady Hermann (f) attempts to defend against Foreign Object but is unsuccessful.


===== In the 8th minute of the match: =====

Lady Hermann (f) rolled OC.

Vanilla Zombie (f) rolled OC.

Lady Hermann (f) executes a SITOUT WHEELBARROW FACEBUSTER....

Vanilla Zombie (f) executes a Piledriver....


===== In the 9th minute of the match: =====

Lady Hermann (f) rolled DC

Vanilla Zombie (f) rolled DC

Both Women in rolled DC

Lady Hermann (f) rolled DC

Vanilla Zombie (f) rolled OC.

Vanilla Zombie (f) executes a Headbutt....

Lady Hermann (f) absorbs the punishment.

Vanilla Zombie (f) is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Lady Hermann (f) was pinned by Vanilla Zombie (f)!!!


Vanilla Zombie (f) wins with a Headbutt over Lady Hermann (f)!!!


Vanilla Zombie gets the win and the fans continue to pop for her.  We can’t explain it but the fans seem to have taken to her and her…let’s call them…unique ways.  She leaves and heads to the back.  Lady Hermann follows a few moments later.

We head backstage and we meet another new addition to the roster.  Her name is Ruby Rose.   She says she’s not sure exactly how she ended up here as she was on her way to a get a triple espresso (or three) and must have gotten on the wrong bus.  She says that she may be short but she is vicious and says that as long as she’s here, she might as well give wrestling a try.  What’s the worst that can happen?

Betsy Cummings makes her way out with her twin sister Felicia Cummings and the two head down to the ring.  They are booed.  Once at the ring, Felicia is turned away by the ref saying he wasn’t going to put up with any interference.  As Felicia was making her way to the back, Ruby Rose comes out and passes by.  Felicia curls her lip and glares at Ruby who pays her no mind.  She gets into the ring and this one kicks off pretty quick.  Betsy controlled the match and took advantage when the ref got “accidentally” bumped and Betsy’s twin Felicia came in through the crowd and continued the fight while her twin sister rested.  Once the ref began to recover, Felicia took off and Betsy resumed her spot in the ring.  We join the match at the 12 minute mark.

===== In the 12th minute of the match: =====

Ruby Rose (f) rolled DC

Betsy Cummings (f) rolled DC

Both Women in rolled DC

Ruby Rose (f) rolled DC

Betsy Cummings (f) rolled OC.

Betsy Cummings (f) executes a LEAPING SNAPMARE....

Ruby Rose (f) absorbs the punishment.


===== In the 13th minute of the match: =====

Ruby Rose (f) rolled OC.

Betsy Cummings (f) rolled OC.

Ruby Rose (f) executes a PENDULUM BACKBREAKER....

Betsy Cummings (f) executes a MONKEY FLIP....


===== In the 14th minute of the match: =====

Ruby Rose (f) rolled OC.

Betsy Cummings (f) rolled DC

Ruby Rose (f) executes a INVERTED D.D.T.....

Betsy Cummings (f) attempts to defend against INVERTED D.D.T. but is unsuccessful.

Ruby Rose (f) is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Betsy Cummings (f) was pinned by Ruby Rose (f)!!!


Ruby Rose (f) wins with a INVERTED D.D.T. over Betsy Cummings (f)!!!

Ruby gets her arm raised as the victor of the match.  She seems pretty excited she won the match and the fans seem to appreciate her hard work.  She leaves to a pop from the crowd.  Felicia runs in from the crowd to check on her sister and complains to the ref that somehow Ruby cheated but he ignores them and leaves.  Betsy and Felicia eventually leave.

We are introduced to a new manager who goes by the name “The Singapore Sensation” Matt Preacher.  Matt says he’s watching all the new talent debuting tonight and he says that he is going to offer to manage some lucky talent a contract and says that he’ll take anyone and make them a champion…count on it.

Brick is backstage and says that Scooter J has always been a jerk and he can’t believe he’s anal enough to force him to put his career on the line but says that if this is what it takes to rid HCW of his annoying presence, it is a small price to pay.

Scooter J is also backstage and he says that Brick has always been a thorn in his side and he says that one by one, his enemies will go the way of the dodo.  He says he’s going to make Brick like a tree and get him out of here.  There is a collective groan by EVERYONE backstage who heard that.

It’s time for the main event.  Brick makes his way out first and the crowd pops.  Once in the ring, his music is cut off and Scooter J makes his way out.  SJ storms down to the ring as the fans boo him.  The two began fighting immediately upon SJ’s entering the ring.  The two fought hard but Brick owned him for 6 minutes.  SJ then rubbed thumbtacks into Brick’s face.  Brick had to bail out of the ring to buy himself some time to remove the thumbtacks from all over his face.  Brick did manage to fight back and hit a spinebuster on SJ right on the thumbtacks.  Scooter J had to bail while a medic at ringside helped remove them.  We join the match at the 15 minute mark.

===== In the 15th minute of the match: =====

ScooterJ rolled DC

Brick rolled OC.

Brick executes a ATOMIC DROP....

ScooterJ attempts to defend against ATOMIC DROP but is unsuccessful.


===== In the 16th minute of the match: =====

ScooterJ rolled OC.

Brick rolled DC

ScooterJ executes a 10 PUNCHES....

Brick absorbs the punishment.


===== In the 17th minute of the match: =====

ScooterJ rolled DC

Brick rolled DC

Both Men in rolled DC

ScooterJ rolled OC.

Brick rolled DC

ScooterJ executes a EYE RAKE....

Brick absorbs the punishment.


===== In the 18th minute of the match: =====

ScooterJ rolled DC

Brick rolled OC.

Brick executes a NA....

ScooterJ absorbs the punishment.


===== In the 19th minute of the match: =====

ScooterJ rolled OC.

Brick rolled OC.

Brick executes a ATOMIC DROP....

ScooterJ executes a SUPERKICK and Brick goes flying INTO A PUDDLE OF THUMBTACKS....

ScooterJ is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Brick was pinned by ScooterJ!!!

ScooterJ wins with a SUPERKICK over Brick!!!


Scooter J wins the match and Brick is now out of HCW.  SJ laughs and points at Brick as he makes the walk to the back.  Brick makes it to the stage, turns and salutes the crowd and then disappears behind the curtain.  The show comes to an end with Scooter J in the ring laughing.

Thanks for reading.  Stay tuned.  More to come.

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