Sunday, July 23, 2017

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2017 #592


Hello fans and welcome back to our newsletter.  Today’s show will be a bit shorter due to our main event being such a big deal.  World Tag Team Champions the Steel Curtain (Buzz and Starbuck Steel) defend their titles in triple threat match against the Smashers and Hoff n Spicy.  GM Max McGillicutty states that if the Curtain lose the belts, they will be out of the title picture for a whole YEAR.  The person who gets pinned (who is representing the other teams) and his partner will be removed from the title picture until he (Max) feels they are ready to represent again.  It seems Max has it out for the champs but wants to make sure to bring out the best in all teams.

Our show kicks off with a match to determine who gets the next shot at the 6 man tag team titles.  First, the 5th Column (Karl Braun, Oswald Zimmerman and Baron von Blood) come out and get booed.  Next, the Muscles Trio comes out (Muscles Thorpe, Weasley and McGuire) and they are wearing their rainbow colored bull horns running around acting all goofy.  They make it to the ring and the Column attack them kicking this one off right away.  The Muscles trio fought back and were beating the tar out of the Column until Baron tripped McGuire and he fell face first on the bottom turnbuckle.  Oswald then tossed McGuire out of the ring and while the Baron and Karl knocked Thorpe and Weasley from the ring, the ref counted to 10 and counted McGuire out.  The 5th Column get the win and appear to be going on to get a title shot at the 6 man titles.  Muscles Thorpe stops them from the ring with mic in hand and challenges them to a best of 5 match to see who REALLY gets to go to the PPV.  Braun says they beat them fair and square but then GM Max McGillicutty comes out and says that a countout is a pretty lousy way to win something important so he tells the 5th Column that they can either restart the match tonight or they can agree to the best of 5.  After some complaining, they finally agreed.  The 5th Column then stormed off.  (13 ½ min).

Max remains on stage after the Muscles leave and announces that once HCW officially expands into Tacoma, WA, he will take over managing that show and Master Bull will once again resume his former GM duties and will remain behind and manage the Phoenix part of the show.  It was determined that once WA is confirmed, he and Master Bull will hold a draft and draw names for their respective shows.  The champs will continue to defend the titles across both shows (one will be Sun and the other on Wed). 

Our next match is ready to kick off and MJ comes out first.  Over the loudspeakers blares “Gumbo 7:30 says it’s suppa time bitch!” and the Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo comes out to a mixed reaction from the crowd.  He and MJ head down to the ring.  Next, Ant Graham comes out and introduces his new guy – Covfefe.  The towering giant comes out masked and dressed in all black.  He makes his way down to the ring slowly, as if he was building up suspense for his entry into the ring.  He immediately attacks Rad who fights back.  Covfefe executes a wrenching armbar but Rad tosses him out of the ring where he paces stalling for time. He gets back in the ring and locks in another wrenching armbar.  Ant Graham climbs on the apron like he was going to give Covfefe something but MJ grabbed him preventing him from doing whatever dastardly feat he was trying to pull off.  The ref came over to separate the two managers and MJ took a swing at Ant but Ant ducked and MJ popped the ref good.  The ref immediately disqualified Rad for managerial interference awarding the match to Covfefe.  Rad was not happy and he jumped Covfefe and locked in a cottonmouth clutch.  Covfefe thrashed around swinging Rad all over the ring.  He ended up getting free enough to hit a black hole slam.  He then nailed Rad with a Big Splash.  Ant laughed at the carnage and he escorted Covfefe to the back.  (2 min for the match; 5 additional for the segment)

Dude USA Mick Rude returns backstage and meets with Max and demands a match against The Unknown Assassin again.  Max says he will make it happen again. 

We’re ready for the next match.  First, Wendell Hammerschmidt comes out to a pop from the crowd.  Next, the rowdy Russian Ivan Dragovich who is booed as he makes his way down to the ring.  Wendell was in control for most of the match but after Ivan connected with a sickle sending Wendell out of the ring, things got a little dicey.  Wendell made it back in at 9.  Ivan then rushed the ropes going for another sickle but Wendell ducked and went for the Red Arrow but Ivan reversed that and went for a release german suplex but Wendell reversed that and hit a german suplex of his own.  He made the cover and got the 3 count.  Wendell gets the win in 18 minutes.

Backstage, The Steel Curtain speak out against the injustices by the tyrant Max McGillicutty.  Buzz says that the GM has had it in for them since the very beginning even when they pandered to the fans.  Starbuck adds that Max can continue to put them in the Kobayashi Maru all he wants but they, like a certain captain, will find a way to win. 

We head back to the ring for the TV title defense.  First, Phat Sol comes out to a huge pop from the crowd.  Next, TV Champion Biceps Bannerman comes out and he’s in a foul mood.  Biceps starts off with chops to the chest of Phat (WOOOOO!) and Phat hits him with a jaw jacker that stunned the big man.  Biceps then accidentally (or purposely) then whipped Phat into the ref taking him out.  Biceps then went and grabbed a chair after fighting with a fan to take it from them.  Finally, he gets back in the ring only to see the ref begin to stir.  He then tosses the chair to Phat who catches it just as the ref looks up.  He sees Phat with the chair and calls for the DQ.  Phat tried to say he didn’t use it but the ref says “I know what I saw.”  Biceps takes his title and leaves but not before Max comes out.  Max says the ref didn’t see what transpired but he did.  Biceps can have this win but he’s not through with Phat Sol.  Max says Phat will get a rematch in one month at the Reign of Champions PPV.  Biceps tries to complain but Max walks off.  (2 min for the match; 5 additional for the segment)

Manager Figgy Newton is backstage with the team of Hoff n Spicy (Davis Hoffmeister and DJ CJ Spice) and Davis says they are excited to finally to take out what was perceived as the two top teams in HCW.  Once they take the titles, they will be the dominant team in all wrestling.  DJ CJ adds in that no team with any real competition can’t match them on their record.  They will continue to dominate the tag team scene and before you know it, they WILL be wearing gold.

Starbuck is backstage and his way is blocked by Smasher #1.  S1 starts to get mouthy and begins to push Starbuck. Starbuck sucker punches Smasher #1 but ends up getting pushed into DJ CJ who was walking by.  “Watch what you’re doing you moron.”  Starbuck says “blow it out your pie hole”.  The three begin to scuffle and Max breaks it up.  Max says that the three of them are OUT of the match tonight and it will be Buzz, Smasher #2 and the Hoff representing their teams.  The stipulation still stands that whoever is pinned is out of future title contentions and if the champs lose, they do not get another title shot for a whole YEAR.

It’s time for our very unique main event.  Representing the Smashers is Smasher #2.  Representing Hoff n Spicy is Davis Hoffmeister.  Finally, representing the tag team champions is Buzz Steel.  Max comes out saying it will be a no countout 60 minute match.  Each person in this match beat the crap out of the others.  It was crazy what all three men brought to this match.  Each person got injured during the match but each recovered and continued to fight.  Also during the 60 minute iron man match, each person’s tag team partner came down to provide “support” for their teammate.  Starbuck came down and hit Smasher #2 with a slingshot suplex.  Smasher #1 dropped Davis with the Fall of Man and DJ CJ took out Starbuck with a bulldog.  After the teammates were all removed from the ring, Buzz, Davis and Smasher #1 continued to fight…all the way to the 60 minute time limit.  As time was running down, Smasher #2 was getting his offense going and Buzz dropped to his knees offering friendship.  Once Smasher #2 was distracted by this, Buzz poked him in the eye.  Right after that, the bell rang bringing this 60 minute war to an end.  GM Max McGillicutty came out and said that he “scored” the match but with no pin or submission, the belts won’t change hands so the Steel Curtain are still the champs.  He now has to decide is it the Smashers or Hoff n Spicy that are out of the tag team picture.  Max thought long and hard and said that Davis did better than Smasher #2 so he’s allowing Hoff n Spicy to remain in the title picture whereas the Smashers are out…for now.   Smasher #1 joined Smasher #2 in the ring to confront Max but DJ CJ and Starbuck Steel came out and hit double dropkicks on the Smashers sending them tumbling out of the ring.  The champs and Hoff n Spicy then had a face off in the middle of the ring as the show comes to an end. 


Stay tuned for more action.

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