Sunday, August 7, 2016

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2016 #496


Hello fans and welcome back to our show.  Tonight’s event begins in Max’s office.  Sitting there with him are ‘the King of Cones’ Magnum Kone and ‘The Ragin Cajun’ Rad Gumbo.  Max tells them not to speak but instead recaps the fight that took place (it was all recorded on cell phones).  Additional Cell phone video continues with Rad Gumbo and Magnum Kone being escorted out by police from Fry’s Electronics.  At least half a dozen times, Magnum was stopped by other officers asking to take a picture with him.  Just before he got taken away, Haagen and Daas show up (next door to the Fry’s is a Haagen Daas ice cream store and they were doing a public relations event) and give ice cream to all the officers, employees and management at Frys’s.  The video ends and Max just glares at them.  Max goes on to say that the lawyers from Fry’s Electronics have sent Max a bill for $50K in damages.  Max says he’ll take it out of their paychecks.  Rad tries to speak up but Max warns him if he does, he will be fired.  A knock on the door is followed by two men in suits who ask to speak to Max.  Max tells Rad and Magnum to leave and go home.  If they have any interaction before he ok’s it, they are both out of a job.   The men in suits let Rad and Magnum leave and close the door behind them.

The first match on the show begins with Perfect Pecs Stoddard making his way to the ring.  He is then followed out by ‘Red Hot’ Lucas Johnston and his manager the Ambassador.   Lucas was not doing well for the first 8 minutes as Pecs just manhandled him.  Finally, the Ambassador takes Lucas out of the ring and tells him to stop being such a nice guy and FIGHT.  Lucas gets back in the ring and does a complete 180 with his attitude.  He no longer sought approval from the fans.  He turned it up a notch that we haven’t seen from him yet.  The fans didn’t care for his new found attitude and voiced their opinions whereas the Ambassador praised him.  The Ambassador strategically “interfered” and that helped Lucas all the more.  Pecs got lucky and hit Lucas with the White Noise piledriver and the Ambassador jumped on the ring for the distraction.  Lucas called for the ref holding his neck and when the ref went to check on him, the Ambassador used that distraction to eye gouge Pecs with some peanut shells.  Blinded, Pecs stumbled back into the ring and Lucas, playing decoy, rolled Pecs up for the 1-2-3.  “Red Hot” gets the win here.  Pecs leaves the ring and Phat Sol comes down.  He and Lucas celebrate in the ring.  The Ambassador says that these two are now a tag team and are throwing out a challenge to the Tag Team Champions for a title match at the PPV.  MJ comes out laughing and says “Sure, we’ll accept.”  MJ walks away laughing as the Smashers, hiding in the audience, hit the ring and attack Phat and Lucas.  They beat them down and then stand over them laughing and then the finally leave.  (16 min for the match; 23 for the segment)

The Steel Curtain are backstage in GM Max McGillicutty’s office.  Buzz voices his concern about the third man constantly interfering in their match costing them.  Max asks what they think he should do.  Starbuck says that they want the third man to be handcuffed to Biceps Bannerman, sitting at ringside.  Max thinks it’s a great idea and says he will make it happen.  The Steel Curtain leave the office. 

We head back to the ring for our next match:  Dude USA Mick Rude taking on Jesse California.  Both men shook hands before the match and it looks like we have ourselves a solid match.  The match was pretty even with no rule breaking going on.  At the 9 minute mark, Jesse connected with some jumping elbow drops.  He picked up Mick Rude and threw him to the ropes.  Mick ducked, hit the ropes again and then shoulder blocked him out of the ring.  Jesse landed hard and then hit the ringside barrier.  The ref counted and reached 10 counting Jesse out.  Dude USA gets the win via countout.  He goes out to help Jesse up and tempers flared briefly before Jesse settled down and shook hands with Mick and the two made their way back.  (9 ½ min)

Backstage, The Savior cuts a promo saying tonight is about redemption.  He promises Drew will be the one to scream “I Quit” and then he will become his minion – just like the millions and millions of sheep that are out there.

Max finished his meeting with the suits and we’ve determined they are lawyers from Fry’s Electronics.  The lawyers walk out thanking him and shake Max’s hand.  Reporter Clarkus Kentus sees them leaving and asks what transpired.  Max says that the lawyers from Fry’s said they got gained so much business because of the “advertising” that the debt was forgiven.  Turns out all the shops including the Haagen Daas store all benefited and everyone was happy.  As part of the settlement, Fry’s said they wanted both Magnum Kone and Rad Gumbo to sign certain items used in their brawl that would be auctioned off.  Rad and Magnum would not get any of the money but that’s just how those things go.

We go back to the ring four our next match.  First, Missy Chick and Kimberly Kiccass come out for this tag team match.  They are then followed out by two members of the Queen’s Court – Lady Hermann and Queen Beckett.  The Queen’s Court has not had the best luck as of late so they are hoping to turn that round tonight.  Right off the bat, Queen Beckett locks Kimberly in the Surrender but Missy makes the save.  Lady Hermann is tagged in and she immediately dispatches Missy Chick by kicking her off the ring and she landed in some chairs at ringside.  Lady Hermann then beat down on Kimberly but soon, her ladyship was getting her ass kicked.  After being pummeled for a few minutes, Lady Hermann tagged back out to the Queen who hits Kimberly with a fallaway slam.  Missy, recovered by now, pulls Lady Hermann off the ring and she hits her face on the mat.  Queen Beckett screams in frustration but then Kimberly locks in a dragon sleeper.  With no one to save her, Beckett has no choice but to tap out.  Kimberly lets up and Missy joins her in the ring as the ref raises their arms as the winners of the match.  Lady Hermann and Queen Beckett sulk to the back.  (7 ½ min).

We cut to the back again and this time we are with Drew the Canadian Love Machine.  Drew says that the Savior is mistaken and tonight, HE will be the one tapping out and Drew finally getting rid of this baggage.  Tonight will be a turning point for Drew, he guarantees it.

We head back to the ring for our next match.  First, the Muscles Trio make their way out and McGuire is complaining about having to be handcuffed.  Thorpe tells him they have it figured out.  Next, the Steel Curtain and Biceps Bannerman make their way out.  The ref immediately pulls Biceps aside and has him sit at ringside.  The ref places one of the handcuffs on Biceps wrist.  The ref calls for McGuire to sit next to him and he is handcuffed.  Biceps stands up when McGuire tries to pull away and then he sits back down.  The Muscles team began by targeting Starbuck and beating him senseless.  He never got a chance to tag out and the Muscles team made sure he stayed put.  McGuire had pulled out some brass knuckles and then blasted Biceps with it over and over.  He then grabbed a hacksaw from under the ring and cut off the cuff.  After being beat down for over 15 minutes, Starbuck makes the hot tag to Buzz who went to town.  McGuire snuck around and pulled Starbuck from the ring and beat him down leaving Buzz to fend for himself.  He did ok though and really owned the ring.  The bell then rang bringing this one to a 20 minute time limit draw.  The Muscles Trio hit the ring and all went after Buzz.  Biceps had recovered by now and joined Buzz in the ring and started to dismantle the trio.  Starbuck eventually joined them and the trio ran off like scalded dogs.  Starbuck, really fed up with the Muscles interference, screamed for Max to do something about this.  Buzz and Biceps helped Starbuck from the ring and they went to the back.  (20 min draw)

Taylor Bella walks in to Max’s office and says that she hoped Max brought in the Duchess for her match tonight.  Max says he did but tells her that by forcing this match now, it is her one and only shot at the title.  If she doesn’t win, she probably will not see a title match anytime in the future.  She says it’s ok as she’s going to win tonight regardless.

It’s time for our grudge match of the night.  Drew the CLM vs the Savior in an I Quit Match.  The Savior makes his way out first and is booed pretty heavily.  Drew then comes out and receives the opposite reaction.  Max comes out and says that these two will have all the time they need to get this one done AND it can only end when one yells “I Quit”.  Max leaves and the match is immediately started.  As expected, this was nothing short of a slobberknocker.  These two beat the holy hell out of each other.  Drew had the lead for quite a while until the Savior began using all sorts of weapons to get Drew to call it quits.  The Savior then took the lead trapping Drew multiple times but he just would not give up.  Drew locked in a Brutal Backbreaker but the Savior made it to the ropes.  This was at the 11 minute mark.  They did not actually try to get the other to quit for over 40 minutes.  Both men were running out of steam and the Savior had exited the ring.  He found some tape and taped his thumb.  He crawled back into the ring only to get dropped by the La Casita.  Drew was getting ready to do something but the Savior instead jambs his taped thumb into the esophagus of Drew.  Exhausted and gasping for air, Drew yells “I Quit” much to the dismay of his fans.  The Savior raises his arms in victory and Drew is really upset.  He leaves the ring in disgrace while the fans tried to chant his name and cheer him up but nothing works.  They turn their attention to the Savior and practically boo him out of the building.  (56 minutes)

Max is back in his office and announces Steel Curtain vs Muscles Trio for the trophy at the PPV in a Steel Cage.  He says that this will settle things once and for all between these two teams.

It is time for the main event.  Taylor Bella vs the Duchess for the Ladies title.  Taylor starts poking the Duchess in the chest. The champ hits a hair pull and toss and Taylor hits a monkey flip.  Duchess did it again and followed it up with a vicious uppercut.  Duchess this a Lou Thesz press and Taylor face plants Duchess on the mat.  Duchess hits a second LTP.  The ref tries to break them up in the corner and Duchess hits a cheap shot.  Taylor hits an uppercut.  Taylor then tries for a rolling leglock but the Duchess reverses it and hits a foot stomp.  She rolls Taylor up and grabbing a handful of tights, gets the 1-2-3.  The Duchess retains her title in just 7 minutes.  Taylor leaves the ring.  El Gato Negro hits the ring and the two have a staredown as the show comes to an end.


That’s all for now. Stay tuned for our next episode.

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