HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2020 #833 (3/18/20)

Hello fans and welcome to another installment of the HCW Wrestling Newsletter.  Due to the Coronavirus outbreak, tonight’s show is taped without an audience.  Our commentators Dash ‘Smooth’ Woodbrick and J9 also have the night off.

The first match on the card is a spot challenge.  Killa Pops has issued a challenge to Talon McFrost for his spot in the World title top 10.  Pops wants another shot at Prophet.  Killa comes out first and is followed by Talon.  Without a crowd, this one starts quickly.

===== In the 1st minute of the match: =====

Talon McFrost rolled OC.

Killa' Pops rolled OC.

Talon McFrost executes a SHORT CLOTHESLINE....

Killa' Pops executes a WRENCHING HEADLOCK....

Just then, World Champion the Wicked Prophet came out and stood at the ring.  Killa Pops became distracted.

===== In the 2nd minute of the match: =====

Talon McFrost rolled OC.

Killa' Pops rolled OC.

Talon McFrost executes a THE YUKON CLOVERLEAF....

Killa' Pops executes a BODY KICKS TO OPPONENT....

Talon McFrost straps in the THE YUKON CLOVERLEAF.  Pops makes a grab for the ropes but Prophet swats his hand away.

Killa' Pops submits!!!

Talon McFrost wins with a THE YUKON CLOVERLEAF over Killa' Pops!!!

Holy Cow, Talon gets the quick win due to outside interference from the King of HCW the Wicked Prophet.  Prophet walks away smiling.  Pops is not a happy camper.

We cut to a promo from GM Max McGillicutty.  “Fans of HCW, for the first time ever, we are conducting our shows in empty arenas.  We understand that this is not preferred by our fans but we take the safety of our fans as one of our top priorities.  There are just some things you don’t mess with. 

I also want to take this moment to announce that both the Huber Clan and the Muscles Trio have been reinstated at the request of both teams.  It has been agreed upon that they will have a match at our upcoming PPV Critical Mass and it will be a specialty match of sorts.  With that, I send you back to the ring.”

Our next match is ready to go.  With no fans in the arena, there is no reason to play anyone’s music.  First, Apollo Gyze and Tommy Lightning come out and enter the ring.  Next, the Masked Banana comes out first and is carrying his mascot Nannie.  He walks to the ring and puts Nannie in a high chair so he/it can see the action.  The US Champion Rad Gumbo comes out next and joins MB at the ring and they enter at the same time.  Like the last match, this one starts immediately.  Apollo tells Tommy to stand on the outside of the ring because he’s “got this”.

===== In the 1st minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled DC

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

Both Men in rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a WHERE Y'AT?  (QUICK JABS)....

Apollo Gyze attempts to defend against WHERE Y'AT?  (QUICK JABS) but is unsuccessful.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo tags out to The Masked Banana

===== In the 2nd minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

The Masked Banana executes a BANANA CREAM PIE....

Apollo Gyze attempts to defend against BANANA CREAM PIE but is unsuccessful.

The Masked Banana tags out to "The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo

===== In the 3rd minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a ONION TWIST (MUTA LOCK)....

Apollo Gyze neutralizes ONION TWIST (MUTA LOCK).

===== In the 4th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a ONION TWIST (MUTA LOCK)....

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo scores 9 points.

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo tags out to The Masked Banana

===== In the 5th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC/TT

Apollo Gyze rolled OC/TT

Everyone in the ring for one round!!!

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a FRENCH QUARTER NELSON (REST HOLD)....

The Masked Banana is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana executes a B.A.N.A.N.A.S.....

Apollo Gyze is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Apollo Gyze executes a FLYING DROPKICK....

Tommy Lightning is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Tommy Lightning executes a SUNSET FLIP....

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 6th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC/TT

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo,  The Masked Banana double teaming for 3 rounds.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a NEW ORLEANS CRAB....

The Masked Banana is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana executes a YELLOW FEVER....

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo, The Masked Banana are double teaming for 2 more rounds.

===== In the 7th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled DC

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo does nothing for the round.

The Masked Banana is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana executes a BANANA HAMMOCK....

Apollo Gyze attempts to defend against Double Teaming. but is unsuccessful.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo, The Masked Banana are double teaming for 1 more rounds.

===== In the 8th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

The Masked Banana rolled DC

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a FRENCH QUARTER NELSON (REST HOLD)....

The Masked Banana is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana does nothing for the round.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo scores 7 points.

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 9th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

The Masked Banana executes a BANANA SPLIT....

Apollo Gyze attempts to defend against BANANA SPLIT but is unsuccessful.

The Masked Banana is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...

Apollo Gyze kicks out of the pin!

The Masked Banana tags out to "The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo

===== In the 10th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled OC/TT

Apollo Gyze,  Tommy Lightning double teaming for 2 rounds.

Apollo Gyze is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Apollo Gyze executes a FLYING DROPKICK....

Tommy Lightning is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Tommy Lightning executes a SIDE HEADLOCK....

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a NEW ORLEANS CRAB....

Apollo Gyze, Tommy Lightning are double teaming for 1 more rounds.

===== In the 11th minute of the match: =====

Apollo Gyze rolled OC.

Tommy Lightning rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled DC

Apollo Gyze is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Apollo Gyze executes a FLYING DROPKICK....

Tommy Lightning is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

Tommy Lightning does nothing for the round.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo attempts to defend against Double Teaming. but is unsuccessful.

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 12th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a COTTONMOUTH CLUTCH....

Apollo Gyze reverses COTTONMOUTH CLUTCH!

Apollo Gyze executes a FLYING DROPKICK....

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo reverses FLYING DROPKICK!

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a RIVER RAT ROUND UP (HOLDING ROPES)....

Apollo Gyze attempts to defend against RIVER RAT ROUND UP (HOLDING ROPES) but is unsuccessful.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo straps in the RIVER RAT ROUND UP (HOLDING ROPES).

Apollo Gyze does not submit!

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo tags out to The Masked Banana

===== In the 13th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC/TT

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo,  The Masked Banana double teaming for 2 rounds.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a ONION TWIST (MUTA LOCK)....

The Masked Banana is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana executes a B.A.N.A.N.A.S.....

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo, The Masked Banana are double teaming for 1 more rounds.

===== In the 14th minute of the match: =====

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo rolled OC.

The Masked Banana rolled DC

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo executes a COTTONMOUTH CLUTCH....

The Masked Banana is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana does nothing for the round.

Apollo Gyze reverses Double Teaming.!

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

"The Ragin Cajun" Rad Gumbo does nothing for the round.

The Masked Banana is a defensive (DC) double teamer.

The Masked Banana does nothing for the round.

Apollo Gyze executes a RUNNING BIG BOOT TO CHEST....

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 15th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

The Masked Banana executes a POTASSIUM BOOST....

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

The Masked Banana is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...

Apollo Gyze kicks out of the pin!

===== In the 16th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled OC.

The Masked Banana executes a SUDDENLY BANANAS....

Apollo Gyze executes a SUICIDE DIVE TO FLOOR....

The Masked Banana is on the outside.  The ref begins the count.

1...2...3...4...5...6...7...

The Masked Banana makes it back into the ring at the 7 count.

===== In the 17th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled DC

Apollo Gyze rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze executes a SPIN-OUT POWERBOMB....

The Masked Banana absorbs the punishment.

Apollo Gyze tags out to Tommy Lightning

===== In the 18th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Tommy Lightning rolled DC

The Masked Banana executes a BANANA SPLIT....

Tommy Lightning reverses BANANA SPLIT!

Tommy Lightning executes a MONKEY FLIP....

The Masked Banana absorbs the punishment.

Apollo Gyze tags himself back in.

===== In the 19th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled OC.

The Masked Banana executes a BANANA CREAM PIE....

Apollo Gyze executes a SUICIDE DIVE TO FLOOR....

The Masked Banana is on the outside.  The ref begins the count.

1...2...3...4...

The Masked Banana makes it back into the ring at the 4 count.

===== In the 20th minute of the match: =====

The Masked Banana rolled OC.

Apollo Gyze rolled DC

The Masked Banana executes a SUDDENLY BANANAS....

Apollo Gyze absorbs the punishment.

The Masked Banana is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...3

Apollo Gyze was pinned by The Masked Banana!!!

The Masked Banana wins with a SUDDENLY BANANAS over Apollo Gyze!!!

The team of the Masked Banana and The Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo get the win.  MB stops and collects Nannie before heading to the back.

Korbi Kong makes her way out and she calls out Hayley Hailstone.  Hayley and her manager Matt Preacher come to the stage.  Korbi motions for Hayley to come to the ring and she obliges.  Hayley and Matt walk down to the ring.  Korbi sits on the second rope and pushes the top rope up so that Haley can enter (also slightly making fun of her height).  Hayley shushes her away and enters the ring.  Hayley goes right on the offensive and slightly injures Korbi.  With some “guidance” from Matt Preacher, she dominated the match.  Korbi got an offensive run going after climbing to the top rope and jumping hitting the Mile High flying elbow drop.  Before she could go for the pin, “Sassy’ Maxine DeVito comes out causing a distraction.  Hayley took advantage and hit the What the Hail and rolled up Korbi (with a handful of tights and her feet on the ropes) and got the 1-2-3.  Hayley gets the win and jumps for joy.  Korbi shoots her an annoyed glance and takes off after Maxine.  Maxine sees her coming so she takes off with Korbi in tow.  (15 min)

Backstage, the World Tag Team Champions the Steel Curtain are cutting a promo.  They say they are looking forward to meeting two of the 6 man champs.  The 6 Man champs held their own in defending their titles but now they are in Tag team action and this is where the Curtain dominates.  Starbuck says that this is their time and Buzz leans over and says “Word”.

We head back to the ring for our next match.  First, Biceps Bannerman comes out and makes his way to the ring.  Next, Scooter J comes out accompanied by TNT.  For this match, TNT is acting as a “consultant” to SJ.  Scooter J gets in the ring and TNT taunts Biceps from the outside.  The bell rings and this one is off to the races.  Biceps used his power and dominated the match.  TNT tried to get involved and ate a huge fist for his trouble.  SJ was starting to mount an offensive but then the loudspeakers blared out “VAMPIRE LUNGES FOR EVERYBODY” and SJ became distracted looking around for the evil, diabolical Dr. Red Fang but he wasn’t there.  Bannerman then whipped SJ to the ropes and hit a huge spinebuster.  Biceps made the cover and got the 3 count.  Bannerman gets the win and leaves after his arm is raised.  TNT enters the ring acting like he was going to attack Bannerman but never acted on it.  He turns around only to come face to face with Dr. Red Fang.  Fang hits TNT with a Vampire Lunge but before he can turn his attention to Scooter J, SJ hits Fang with a superkick followed by 10 punches.  SJ kicks Fang where the sun don’t shine and walked away all smug.  I am sure the fans at home are booing the crap out of him. (10 min).  The Ambassador rushes out and helps Fang to the back.

It’s time now for our main event.  First, Maximillian Redbeard and Superquake Ferguson come out and walked down to the ring and entered.  Next, the World Tag Team Champions came out and stood on the stage staring at their opponents in the ring.  Buzz and Starbuck Steel then walked down to the ring and got in.  With no fans to psyche up, this one is ready to get moving.

===== In the 1st minute of the match: =====

Buzz Steel rolled OC.

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled DC

Buzz Steel executes a BUZZ CUT (DIAMOND CUTTER)....

Maximillian  Redbeard absorbs the punishment.

Buzz Steel is attempting a pin!!!

1...2...

Maximillian  Redbeard kicks out of the pin!

Buzz Steel tags out to Starbuck Steel

===== In the 2nd minute of the match: =====

Starbuck Steel rolled OC.

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled DC

Starbuck Steel executes a BUCK U (NECKBREAKER)....

Maximillian  Redbeard absorbs the punishment.

Starbuck Steel tags out to Buzz Steel

===== In the 3rd minute of the match: =====

Buzz Steel rolled DC

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled DC

Both Men in rolled DC

Buzz Steel rolled DC

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled OC/TT

Maximillian  Redbeard,  Superquake Ferguson double teaming for 1 rounds.

Maximillian  Redbeard is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Maximillian  Redbeard executes a ASGARD BODY SLAM....

Superquake Ferguson is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Superquake Ferguson executes a SPLASH....

Buzz Steel absorbs the punishment.

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 4th minute of the match: =====

Buzz Steel rolled DC

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled DC

Both Men in rolled DC

Buzz Steel rolled OC.

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled OC.

Buzz Steel executes a OFFER FRIENDSHIP BUT POKE IN EYE....

Maximillian  Redbeard executes a HIP TOSS....

Buzz Steel tags out to Starbuck Steel

===== In the 5th minute of the match: =====

Starbuck Steel rolled OC/TT

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled OC/TT

Everyone in the ring for one round!!!

Buzz Steel is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Buzz Steel executes a FLYING KNEE SMASH....

Starbuck Steel is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Starbuck Steel executes a BUCK U (NECKBREAKER)....

Maximillian  Redbeard is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Maximillian  Redbeard executes a BOOT TO FACE....

Superquake Ferguson is a offensive (OC) double teamer.

Superquake Ferguson executes a BEARHUG....

Double teaming ends.

===== In the 6th minute of the match: =====

Starbuck Steel rolled OC.

Maximillian  Redbeard rolled OC.

Starbuck Steel executes a OUT OF THIS WORLD DROPKICK....

Maximillian  Redbeard executes a HEAVE INTO CROWD....

Starbuck Steel is on the outside.  The ref begins the count.

1...2...3...4...5...

Just then, the Freedom Fighters (Justice and Flash) rush out and attack Starbuck beating him down.  They then take off.

6...7...8...9...10

Starbuck Steel is counted out!!!

Maximillian  Redbeard wins with a HEAVE INTO CROWD - Count Out over Starbuck Steel!!!

However, the titles do not change hands on a count out so the Steel Curtain are still the World Tag Team Champions.  Buzz Steel gets on the mic and calls out the Freedom Fighters demanding a match at the PPV.

The show comes to an end with Buzz waiting but not receiving an answer.

Our “empty arena” event continues into this weekend’s Saturday Night Showdown.  Stay Tuned.

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2020 #832 (3/11/20)

Hello fans and welcome back to another installment of HCW’s Wrestling Newsletter.  We are on the road coming to you from Portland, OR.  Pyro goes off and we head to the announce booth.

“J9 here alongside my fellow commentator Dash ‘Smooth’ Woodbrick.  So Dash, looking at the card, it appears we have a full stack with 2 title matches and 4 champions on the card.”  Dash looks at her. “First, it’s SMOOOOTH, not smooth and second, why is that numbskull Masked Banana wrestling for a title when he already has one?  I mean, it’s a joke he holds one title and putting him against another champ is ridiculous.  I mean, the Ladies Champ…she deserves a night off so I understand her not defending the title tonight.”  J9 interrupts “Playing the bias card already SMOOOOTHIE McShake?  Enough of your blabbing…it’s time for our first match.”

Music plays and out comes 1/3^rd of the 6 Man Champions Maximillian Redbeard.  He gets a nice pop as he heads down to the ring.  Once in, he begins to psyche up the crowd until his opponent is introduced with “APOLLO GYZE DON’T APOLOGIZE” and out comes Apollo.  He is booed heavily as he makes his way down to the ring.  He sneers at the fans and even steals a couple of their signs throwing them to the floor.  He gets in the ring and looks up at Redbeard.  A big ol’ fist from Redbeard to Apollo’s face kicks this one off.  Apollo fought back and had control for the first 6 minutes of the match but then a Knoggin Knocker from Redbeard dazed and confused Apollo.  He then controlled the rest of the match right up to the end.  In the final minute of the match, Apollo was on the mat looking up at the lights and then a big shadow overtook him and Redbeard dropped a huge leg drop.  Maximillian made the cover and got the 3 count seconds before the time limit was set to expire.  Redbeard gets the win and the fans pop for him.  (20 min)

“Apollo was robbed!  That overgrown tree trunk cheated.  Apollo was trying to apologize and that big goof disregarded it” Dash exclaimed.  “Give me a break Dash” J9 interrupted. 

Backstage, Texas Wildfire is being interviewed.  “I know I lost at the PPV and with that went any other shot at the belt while the phony King Wicked Prophet still holds that belt.  I may not be able to challenge him for the belt again but mark my words, I will get a match again soon.”  Wildfire walks off and behind the curtain, we see a shadow moving.  Hmmm.

We head back to the ring and Madman Mason comes out first.  He is booed as he makes his way to the ring.  He gets in and mocks the fans getting them riled up.  Music changes and out comes Texas Wildfire.  “Listen to that crowd Dash” J9 exclaims.  Dash responds with “Ho hum”.  Wildfire makes his way to the ring high fiving the fans along the way.  He gets into the ring where he is immediately attacked by Mason.  Wildfire immediately fights back but just then, Jack Lawson’s image appears on the Omegatron and Mason is confused.  Wildfire turns the heat up and Mason just can’t handle it.  At the 8 minute mark, Wildfire hits the Hangman’s clothesline and goes for the cover getting the 1-2-3.  Texas Wildfire gets the win in dominating fashion.  J9 is ecstatic.  “That is how you get things done.  Wildfire style.”  Dash responds with “Cheat, cheat, cheat…that’s all these goodie two shoes know how to do.  Given a fair shot, Mason would have had him for lunch.”  J9 shakes her head. “Dash, how do you live with yourself?”  Dash smiles “I gotta be me.”

Backstage, the Masked Banana is being interviewed.  “You know, the power of the Nana (and Nannie) will take me to great heights.”  He is asked about the AA title “Oh, that, you see, I left it at home today so technically, it’s not on the line when I take on US Champion Rad Gumbo.”  He is again questioned about his being worthy to fight for the US title.  “I said it once and I’ll say it again.  The power of the Yellow will lead me on a path to the Grape and there, I will achieve grapeness and fulfill my destiny.  If you want to see what I’ll do tonight, watch this video.”  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wxij2asdwBk  Banana walks off.

Our next match begins with Col. Samuel Flagg and Matches Malone making their way out.  They are booed heavily but neither seem to care.  They enter the ring.  Dash speaks first “That Col. Flagg is a true American Hero.  Move over GI Bro.”  He stands up “J9, stand up when a hero is standing before you.”  J9 doesn’t budge.  “Pass”.  The music changes and out comes Davis ‘the Hoff’ Hoffmeister and Drew the Canadian Love Machine.  The fans explode with applause and J9 smiles “THERE are our heroes.  These guys are the backbone of the company.”  Dash wrinkles his nose as if something unpleasant was in the air.  “What a load of “(he gets bleeped out which is hilarious).  He sits down in a huff.  Davis and Drew totally dominated their opponents getting in easily 10 offensive moves to their opponents move.  Matches Malone got taken out early and Flagg had to handle the match on his own.  Davis and Drew took their turns demolishing Flagg.  10 minutes in, Drew is tagged in and he hits Flagg with the Lover Bomb for a 2 count.  He came back and hit the La Casita.  With no one to make the save, Drew makes the cover and gets the easy two count.  The fans pop huge for their favorites.  Back at commentary, Dash was grumbling under his breath.   Davis and Drew left and made their way to the back.  Matches finally recovered and slid in the ring to check in on his tag partner.  He helped Flagg to his feet only for the Col to ambush Malone hitting a Patriotic Inverted Slam.  He began stomping on Malone’s head until the ref managed to break it up.  Dash begins bellowing at ringside.  “HA!  That traitor Malone got what he deserved.  Good for you Col.” Flagg leaves in disgust and heads to the back.  The ref helped Malone to his feet and helped him backstage.  (11 min for the match; 5 for the aftermath).

Backstage, Drew and Davis are ambushed by the Smashers.  D&D fought them off until the backstage hands broke up the fight.   It looks like the Smashers are escalating this feud.  They better be able to hold their own.

Our TV Title match is up next.  First, Ghee Buttersnaps comes out to a decent pop from the crowd.  Next, the TV Champion the Banker comes out accompanied by his manager Ruth Heartless.  The duo are booed as they make their way to the ring.  The Banker gets on the mic and after running down Ghee, he turned his attention to the Flannel wearing lumberjack.  “Jack Crack Lumber.  What a goofy name.  I guess it suits you, you Neanderthal.  I exude confidence; you…well, I don’t know what that odor is but it sure doesn’t smell right.  HA HA.”  J9 comments “The Banker really is a rude, crude, dude.”  Dash smiles “He’s right about one thing, trees smell better than Flubber Lumber.”   Ghee took the match to the champ and actually dominated for almost the whole match.  It wasn’t until the end that the Banker (with his managers’ influence) took back control.  At the 19 minute mark, the Banker hits the Credit Check Chop and rolled Ghee up (with a handful of tights) and got the 1-2-3.  The Banker steals a win.  He stands in the ring and holds his title high still mocking Lumber until Jack comes out.  The fans pop as Lumber rushes down to the ring.  He and the Banker brawl and Lumber drops him with the Axe.  The Banker rolls out of the ring and Ruth helps him up.  Jack gets on the mic and tells the Banker he is cashing in his title shot at the PPV.  The fans pop again. Dash is irate.”  That lumbering lunatic…what does he think he’s doing attacking a champion the caliber of the Banker?”  J9 glares at Dash.  “You are a bigger idiot than the Banker.”  Dash looked astonished.  “Well I never….”

We cut backstage where Larry Morton is talking with Ladies Champion Catalina Harper.  Catalina say that she takes on the little hailstone.  She says she defeated Maxine, Violet and tons of the roster to make it to this point.  In two weeks, she takes on the “who cares Bella” and will walk away with her title intact as she heads into the PPV.  She meows as she walks off.

We head back to the ring for the next match.  First, Hayley Hailstone makes her way to booing from the crowd. Absent is her manager Matt Preacher (not sure where he disappeared to). She flips off the fans as she makes her way down to the ring.  She gets into the ring and continues to mock the fans.  Dash exclaims “The best wrestler in the business; hands down.”  J9 look at him.  “I think the current Ladies Champion will have something to say about that.”  “Ah what does she know?  She’s just an old cat lady.”  J9 adds “Who can kick your you-know-what Dash.”  The music changed and then out comes the Ladies Champion Catalina Harper.  She too is booed as she heads to the ring.  She ignores them and gets into the ring. The title is not on the line in this match so Hayley needs a win if she wants a future title match.  The champ took control early and dominated the challenger.  Hayley got some good shots in and a near fall after hitting the What the Hail but Catalina took back control.  At the 17 minute mark, Hayley went for a tornado DDT but Catalina reversed it and hit the Purr-fect storm.  She went for the pin and got the 1-2-3.  She has her armed raised in victory but that victory is cut short when Violet Valkyrie ran out like a bullet to the ring and began brawling with Catalina.  Hayley was on the outside of the ring laughing when Taylor Bella came in from the crowd and she and Hayley began fighting all the way to the back.  Catalina dropped Violet and then took off.  Violet recovered quickly and followed.  (17 min for the match; 5 for the aftermath).

We head backstage with Larry Morton and he is with the US Champion the Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo.  Gumbo says he doesn’t care if the Masked Banana has his title on the line as he is not interested in that belt but he will be retaining his title after the match.  When asked if he’s looking past the Masked Banana and to the next fight against Apollo and he replies “Mon Ami, I don’t care about either of dem.  I want dat phony King Wicked Prophet.  Let me tell you something...from one King (former) to another…your belt AND crown…will be mine.”  Gumbo walks off.

It’s time for our main event.  First, the music plays and out comes the Anytime/Anywhere Champion the Masked Banana.  While the music plays, Dash sits behind the commentary desk shaking his head “That yellow goof.  ‘oh I want to be a grape…look at me…I want to be burple’…what a crock.  And Gumbo better watch himself calling out Prophet…he may get more than he bargains for.”  J9 says “For once, there is one thing I agree with you on…if you call out the World Champion and King of HCW, you better be able to back it up.”  After MB got into the ring, the music changed and we hear “GUMBO 7:30 MEANS ITS SUPPA TIME, BITCH!” and out comes the US Champion the Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo.  Gumbo comes out with his manager Ms. Alexandria.  Gumbo gets a nice pop from the crowd as he makes his way to the ring.  He gets in and removes his title holding it high.  The fans pop and even the Masked Banana clapped his hands for the champ.  Gumbo hands his title to the ref and the bell rings starting this one off.  Gumbo controlled the match until about half way and MB turned up the heat on the champ.  Both men got in some really good shots but each managed to kick out of pin attempts.  16 minutes into the match, Gumbo locked in a French Quarter Nelson (a rest hold) and MB rested a little too long and Gumbo turned it right into a pin and got the 3 count.  Rad Gumbo gets the win.  The ref hands Gumbo his title and he holds it high as the fans pop for him.  Masked Banana walks over and extends his hand.  Gumbo contemplates and then shakes it.  Just then, Apollo Gyze hits the ring and knocks the Masked Banana out of the ring before attacking Gumbo.  The two begin fighting and Masked Banana gets back in the ring to help make a save but he is attacked by Tommy Lighting.  All 4 men are fighting in the ring and MB hurls Tommy over the top rope to the floor.  Rad hits Apollo with the Where ya at (quick jabs) and Apollo falls through the ropes to the floor.  Just then, GM Master Bull comes out and says that at our next show, Rad Gumbo will be teaming up with the Masked Banana and they will take on Apollo Gyze and Tommy Lightning.  The fans pop as Apollo and Tommy glare at their opponents from the outside of the ring.  The show then comes to an end.

Editor’s note:  Due to the widespread pandemic of the Coronavirus, HCW will be holding its next two weeks’ worth of shows in empty arenas.  This includes the Saturday Night Showdown on 3/21.  We will still be there to call the action.  Stay tuned.

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2020 #831 (3/04/20)

Hello fans and welcome back to another installment of HCW’s Wrestling Newsletter.  Pyro goes off and the show begins at commentary.

J9 begins “Welcome one and all back to another great episode of Tacoma Thunder.  Tonight Dash, Dr. Red Fang defends the Hardcore title against the former King.  Also, the Masked Banana is here so we can expect the Anytime/Anywhere title to be on the line.  The World Tag Team Champions the Steel Curtain are on the show but in a non-title match and the Six Man Tag Team Champions defend their titles tonight.”  Dash is shaking his head.  “Finally, I get a word in.  First, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…the yellow unitard is an embarrassment to our sport.  Why are the tag champs on the card if they’re not defending their titles?  Must be scared.  Finally, the most misunderstood man in all of wrestling – Dr. Red Fang – is forced to defend his title against the most boring person in all of wrestling “boring” Lucas Johnston.  Speaking of the good Dr., I have an interview to go conduct.”  Dash gets up and walks to the back much to the shock and dismay of J9.  “Well, that was unexpected.  Anyway, let’s get this show on the road.”

As our first match begins, Korbi Kong comes out to a huge pop from the crowd.  She high fives the fans and makes her way into the ring.  She climbs in and holds both arms in the air and the fans pop.  She is interrupted when her opponent Hayley Hailstone makes her way out with her manager Matt Preacher.  The duo are booed as they make their way down to the ring.  Hayley tries to “shush” Korbi away so that she can enter the ring and when Korbi refuses to budge, Hayley complains to the ref.  The ref directs Korbi to her corner and Hayley enters.   When Korbi turns her back to interact with the fans, Hayley attacks her starting this one off. It only took 3 minutes for Preacher to get involved.  Preacher verbally antagonizes and agitates Korbi.  Hayley controlled the pace of the match until Korbi locked her in an arm triangle.  Hayley went into panic mode flopping around like a fish out of water until she reached the ropes to break the hold.  A vicious eye rake by Hayley caused Korbi to break the hold.  Korbi continued to hold her own until Preacher started to interfere but Korbi warned him off only for Hayley to hit her from behind with a lariat.  She makes the cover putting her feet on the second rope for leverage and gets the 1-2-3.  Hayley steals a win and Korbi is a little pissed.  Korbi rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chair.  Hayley and Preacher see it and bolt up the ramp to the back.  Korbi interacts with the fans as she makes her way to the back.  (12 min)

J9 comments “Korbi is not a happy camper and Hayley better watch her back.”

Back in the office of the GM, Master Bull has a statement to make.  “Based on the actions of the Huber Clan attacking the Muscles Trio first sending them to the hospital and then attacking them there, I am hereby suspending the entire team.  They can have a couple of weeks off to contemplate their actions.  Max McGillicutty will have a separate announcement later in the show.  Back to you J9.”

J9 seems shocked.  “What a bombshell dropped by our GM Master Bull.  He has announced the suspension of the Huber Clan.  The office will keep us apprised of what will come next.  The next match is ready to go.”

The fans pop as Drew the Canadian Love Machine and Davis Hoffmeister make their way out.   They interact with the fans and head down to the ring.  The get the fans pumped up only for them to turn sour when Scooter J and TNT come out.  The two jaw jack with the fans and make their way to the ring.  Scooter J sneers at the fans and enters the ring.  He flips off both Davis and Drew and TNT responds with “Aww SNAP”.  The match begins but Scooter J and TNT injure both Drew and Davis.  Davis is incapacitated first but as soon as he recovered, Drew was taken out.  This allowed SJ and TNT control the pace of the entire match.  At the 20 minute mark, Drew recovered and tagged Davis out but TNT caused a distraction and the ref didn’t see the tag and sent Drew back out.  TNT then takes a shot at Drew and the ref forced him out of the ring again.  Scooter J set Davis up for a piledriver and TNT ran over and added additional force turning it into a spike piledriver.  The ref sees SJ making the cover and counts 1-2-3.  Scooter J and TNT get the win and mockingly laugh at Drew who was helpless.  Drew goes to check on Davis who is moving slowly.  He helps him to the back.  (22 min)

We head back to the interview area and Dash ‘Smooth’ Woodbrick is waiting.  “Ladies and Germs, I introduce to you the Ambassador and the NEW Hardcore Champion Dr. Red Fang.”  Fang and his manager walk into the camera view.  The Ambassador speaks for Fang.  “Dash, thanks for having us.  As you may know, this man is the most dangerous man on the planet and no force of nature will break his will.”  Dash speaks “I have seen this man in action and he is about as hardcore as they come.  Tonight, Dr. Red Fang takes on that pitiful excuse of ex-royalty Lame-O Luckless Johnston.”  The Ambassador shakes his head “Johnston, you are in the wrong place at the wrong time.  The Dr. here is going to tear you limb from limb nd there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.”  Fang looks at the camera and says “I have a prescription for you...PAIN.  Sorry Mr. "Tea"…no, scratch that…I’m not sorry!”  The Ambassador and Fang walk away.

Our next match is getting ready to begin but first, Dash is making his way back to commentary.  He sits down and puts on his headset.  J9 says “Dash Woodbrick is back.  Welcome back Dash!”  Dash gives her a confused look. “Thank you”.  J9 comments “Hope that interview was all you hoped it would be.  Now, we have another match to call.” Dash looks flabbergasted.  “Phat Sol…what the hell is that?  And why is Tommy Lightning being subjected to wrestling this schmuck?”  J9 says “Give me a break Dash.”

Phat Sol comes out first and the fans pop for him.  He makes his way down and enters the ring.  He climbs the second turnbuckle and raises his fists in the air.  He barely starts to get a pop when the music changes and out comes Tommy Lightning.  Tommy is booed heavily and he gives the fans what he feels is an appropriate response (NSFW).  He gets into the ring and continues to jawjack with the fans.  Finally the bell rings and this one begins.   Tommy hits a leg drop first but Phat then bodyslams him.   Phat then hits Tommy with the Phat’s Enough and goes for the pin but only gets a 1 count. Tommy then goes for a monkey flip but before he can do anything, the loudspeakers begin blaring out the song “Hey Margarita” (the Masked Banana’s music) and Tommy is perturbed and gets up.  When no one comes out, Phat gets up and hits Tommy with the Phat’s Enough again and solidly hooks the leg to get the 1-2-3.  Phat Sol has his arm raised after this brief 3 minute fight.  Tommy is pissed and rolls out of the ring and rushes to the back.  Phat stays and interacts with the fans before making his own way back.  (3 min)

Backstage, a pissed off Tommy Lightning grabs a ref and then seeks out the Anytime/Anywhere Champion the Masked Banana and attacks him.  It looks like our AA match is going on right now.   Tommy locks in an abdominal stretch but MB won’t tap.   Banana goes for the yellow fever but Tommy negates it.   MB then hits the Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich and Tommy drops to the floor.  MB then locks in the Simply B.A.N.A.NA.’s and Tommy taps out.  The Masked Banana wins this one but he hears more people coming so he makes like a tree and gets out of there (it should be leave (leaf) but it’s MB so who knows).  (4 min)  Tommy is not happy and storms off.

We go back to the office of the GM and Max McGillicutty has an announcement.  “Earlier this evening, Master Bull suspended the Huber Clan for their vicious attack on the Muscles.  The Muscles came back from that injury and attempted to do to the Clan what was done to them.  I cannot condone any act of vigilantism so I am reluctantly suspending the Muscles Trio also.  Action is to be taken by the office of the GM and not any one wrestler or group.  They too will be off for a couple of weeks to cool down.  This goes to each and every person on the roster.  This will not be tolerated.  Suspensions or worse await anyone who decides to take retaliation into their own hands.”

The Steel Curtain and Biceps Bannerman are backstage.  Buzz says that it’s been awhile since they held the 6 Man titles with their good friend Biceps.  Tonight, they can accomplish the feat of all feats…win the 6 Man titles and then be dual champions.  Starbuck agrees but says they should not underestimate the champs.  As good as the team of El Chango, Leon Teremoto and Magnum Kone were, the champs were that much better.  Biceps chimes in.  “There is lots of great competition but we are the best in the world…just not the champs.  Tonight, we fix that and claim what is rightfully ours.”  All three men lean in and say “Word”.

We cut back to the announce booth.  Dash exclaims “About time.  They get what they deserve.  The Clan were just hanging out and the Muscles, the band of miscreants they are, just attacked them for no good reason.”  J9 says “Dash, you are obtuse.   The Hubers attacked the Trio and they were only retaliating.”  Dash responds “You heard our GM.  No one takes action into their own hands.  Good riddance for now I say.”  J9 shakes her head “Dash, sometimes I wonder about you.”  Dash responds with a snide “Why I’m so good looking?”  J9 rolls her eyes.  “Back to the action.”

Music begins and out comes “Luke Warm” Lucas Johnston.  The reaction from the crowd, as expected, is luke-warm.  He makes his way to the ring and enters.  He doesn’t try to get the crowd engaged; he sort of just stands there.  Next we hear blaring over the loudspeakers “VAMPIRE LUNGES FOR EVERYBODY” and out comes the Ambassador and the Hardcore Champion Dr. Red Fang.  They pass by the fans booing them and one just so happened to have a sign that read “Dr. Red Fang is my father” and he grabbed it and tore it to shreds.  The fan looked sad and Fang cackled at him.  He gets into the ring and immediately attacks Lucas.  Fang leaves the ring and reaches under it pulling out a coal miners glove.  He goes back into the ring and smacks Lucas with it.  Fang follows it up with the Skull Crusher and an airplane spin.  Lucas attempted a back slide to try for a pin but he had no leverage and Fang was back on his feet.  Lucas hits some quick forearm shots but then Fang face raked him with the coalminer’s glove and followed it up with a Vampire Lunge.  Fang picked him up and nailed an airplane spin.  He dumps Lucas to the mat and goes for the pin.  The ref counts 1-2-3 and this one is over that quick.  Dr. Red Fang retains his title but then is ambushed by both TNT and Scooter J.  They beat Fang down and then quickly turn their attention to the Ambassador.  TNT grabs him by the collar and is getting ready to slug him but then Fang is back up and wielding the coalminer’s glove.  He slugs SJ in the gut and smacks TNT with it.  Both men bail out of the ring.  Scooter J and TNT are cursing at Fang.  Fang has had enough and exits the ring and begins to chase them to the back.  (4 min)

J9 looks at Dash.  Dash is speechless.  “I’ve got no words…” is all he can say.  J9 says “Well, I can tell you that this feud isn’t over and it’s going to continue until one of them can no longer stand.”

We go backstage with the Six Man Tag Team Champions.  Maximillian Redbeard starts off “Well, ya know something…teams like the Road Warriors (pop from the crowd) who were great in their day were eventually knocked off their perch.  Tonight, we prove to the world that the best who were – the Steel Curtain and Biceps – will be replaced by the best today – us.”  Killa added “Preach brotha.  Steel Curtain and Brother Biceps, we take absolutely nothing from you.  Hell, the Steel Curtain are the World Tag team Champions.  We however are the best 3 man team in sports entertainment.  I am confident we will be successful.”  Superquake added “You see these hands?  They’ve knocked out the biggest and baddest around the world.  Tonight, if you get too close, they’ll knock you out too.”  The champs then left for the ring.

J9 says “Both teams are extraordinary.  This main event should be one for the record books.”  Dash is not impressed.  “The Steel Curtain are more like plastic wrap or cheap aluminum foil – barely for anything good and then thrown on the trash heap.”  J9 replies “Big words Dash, you better hope they don’t hear you say that.”  Dash smiles “What are they going to do?  I’m not a wrestler.  They put one finger on me and I’ll sue them right out of the business. HA.”  “Give me a break Dash.  Here come the challengers now.”

Music hits and the fans pop as the Steel Curtain – Buzz and Starbuck Steel and Biceps Bannerman come out to what seems to be the loudest pop of the night.  J9 smiles “Looks like thousands of people are showing you that you are wrong.”  Dash only replies with a “Harrumph”.   The challengers high five with the fans and make their way to the ring.  They continue psyching up the crowd for a moment or two.  The music then changed and out comes the Champions.  Killa Pops, Maximillian Redbeard and Superquake Ferguson all comes out to a nice pop from the crowd.  They too interact with the fans and make their way to the ring.  They enter and each man holds the title over their heads.  All six men meet in the center of the ring and standing nose to nose, each man steps back and they all shake hands.  Looks like we’re going to have ourselves a clean match.  Dash didn’t think so.  “Oh look, they all shake hands but just you watch, tempers are going to flare and fists will fly.”  J9 says “Dash, give it a rest.”  Control of the match changed hands frequently throughout the match.  The champs had it first but then the challengers got in some triple teaming.  As Dash had predicted, tempers did flare after Ferguson was choking Buzz in the corner with his huge boot.  Biceps ran it to break it up and Ferguson smashed Bannerman with a huge headbutt.  Choking, eye rakes and all other heelish moves came from the 6 competitors.  “Ha” exclaimed Dash, “I called it.”  The Freedom Fighters came in through the crowd and attacked Buzz and Starbuck from behind taking them out of the match.  They then took off through the crowd.  It came down to Ferguson and Bannerman.  Biceps hit a huge powerslam on Superquake showing off his massive strength.  Superquake then eye raked him and hit him with a massive fist dropping Biceps to the mat.  Superquake then stood on Biceps’ throat before going for the pin and securing the 1-2-3.  The champs retain and stand in the ring victorious.   The fans weren’t all that thrilled by the interference from the Freedom Fighters but gave the champs the ovation they deserved.  (16 min).

The show comes to an end with the champs standing tall and medics checking on Buzz and Starbuck.  As the camera ceased rolling, Redbeard got on the mic.  “We said we’d retain and now our stock has risen so much that we are next in line for a shot at the Tag Team titles.  Steel Curtain, we’ll see you soon…real soon.”

That’s all for now.  Stay tuned.

HCW Wrestling Newsletter 2020 #830 (3/1/20) –PPV fallout

Hello fans and welcome back to another installment of the HCW Wrestling newsletter.  Sunday’s PPV sure held a lot of surprises with World Champion the Wicked Prophet not only retaining his title in the match against Texas Wildfire but he also defeated the previous King, Lucas Johnston to become the new King of HCW.   We also had some departures from HCW that include El Chango, the King of Cones Magnum Kone and Leon Teremoto who all will be inducted into this year’s Hall of Fame class.  Tempest Fortune is also officially gone as she has decided to go back to school to finish earning her degree.  Short timer member Husky Khan is also gone.  Apparently, professional wrestling wasn’t good enough for him so he opted to try his hand again at sumo wrestling.

With the departures, we have two new members joining HCW as commentators.  J9 and Dash “Smooth” Woodbrick will be calling the action moving forward.

We cut to the commentary booth.  “Fans of all ages, HCW is here” J9 says.  “Fresh off a Pay Per View, we are expecting tons of fallout.”  Dash interrupts “No one cares what the people want.  What matters is the CHAMP retained and now rules HCW as the King.  Those foreigners El Chumpo, Teremomasbaby and the goofy ice cream vendor The King of Boredom (said it wrong on purpose) are gone.”  The fans boo.  “Boo all you want.  The goofballs are out and now HCW streamlines with real talent with men like Wicked Prophet and Catalina Harper leading the way.”  J9 asks “What about Husky Khan?” Dash laughs.  “That walking monstrosity?  Good riddance.”  She shakes her head. “Give me a break Dash.   Well, without further ado, we have show to begin so let’s get to the action.

Freedom Fighters vs Adam Jameson & Billy Robbins.  Adam and Billy come out first to a nice pop from the crowd.  Next, the Freedom Fighters (Flash and Justice) make their way out to booing from the crowd.  They flip off the fans and make their way to the ring.  They hit the ring and attack Adam and Billy to start this off.  The Fighters dominated early and held that lead throughout the match.  9 minutes in, Flash hits Billy with a Reverse spike hurricanrana and easily makes the cover to get the uncontested 1-2-3.  The Freedom Fighters secure the win in dominating fashion. 

Dash begins “Damn, those Fighters beat the living hell out of those chump nuggets.  I need to go interview them in the ring.”  Dash gets up and joins Flash and Justice in the ring.  Dash begins “Fighters, once again you dominate the tag team scene.”  Flash speaks up “That is how you get things done.  Dominate and destroy.”  Justice speaks up.  “Steel Curtain…listen up.  We are coming for you.  Go polish those belts up and have them ready for us when we beat you for them.”  The Fighters leave.  Dash says “Steel Curtain, beware the Freedom Fighters.”

The Masked Banana is backstage with Larry Morton: “Grapeness just got a lot further away. I was thrown out of the ring and eliminated nobody. It reminds me of a time when I was just a little plantain. Back then we put sweat and tears into becoming the best bananas we could – all while the fire of envy of the grapes burned in our hearts. That fire has kept me warm through many winter years. That winter is still here, and I feel no closer to becoming a grape than I did back then. Have you ever had a roasted banana? Me either.

Are my desires misguided? In wrestling I have confided, by Jack Lumber I sided and by teaming we were grided. To all this I say: my dismay will be repaid by achievement, through bereavement of grapeness I will obtain. I jumped out of an airplane, my left brain is a hurricane, I’m not here to entertain, these words aren’t the mary jane, I landed on a whooping crane, I named her Lorraine, and we flew over Spain. In the air Lorraine taught me about my destiny, even though this battle got the best of me, I’ll let it be, you will see when I am a Grape I will be free.”

 Larry Morton:  Um, you realize that you are the Anytime/Anywhere champion, right?

MB:  Um…Nevermind then.

Back at commentary, J9 begins:  “The Masked Banana is a funny guy.”  Dash disputes that.  “No, he’s a big yellow goof.  And what is up with that mascot thing?”  J9 replies “Dash, that is Nannie.  Don’t you know anything?”  Dash responds “What I know is that we need to stop talking about that moron and get to the next match.”

The loudspeakers blare out “VAMPIRE LUNGES FOR EVERYONE” and out comes the Ambassador followed by Dr. Red Fang.  Fang is booed heavily.  He snarls and growls at the fans as he makes his way to the ring.  J9 comments “That is one scary dude.”  Dash shakes his head.  “He’s not evil; he’s just misunderstood.”  J9 looks at him.  “WHAT?”  Fang gets in the ring and continues to snarl at the fans.  The music changes and out comes the Hardcore Champion Outback Oscar.  Oscar is cheered as he makes his way to the ring.   Fang immediately goes on the offensive in this death match and he takes it to the champion scoring many near fall pin attempts but couldn’t keep the champion down.   Oscar goes for the Outback Stretch but Fang reverses it and hits the Skull Crusher.  He makes the cover and gets the 3 count but Oscar still has a change and is able to make it to his feet.  The match continues.   Oscar wallops Fang with a chair and throws him hard into the steel post.  Fang goes for the Vampire Lunge but a security guard gets in the way and ends up taking the brunt of the Lunge’s damage.  Oscar crunches Fang into the steel post again and goes for a pin but Fang manages to kick out.  At the 22 minute mark, Fang brings a chair into the ring and hits Oscar with a Transylvania piledriver on the chair.   He makes the cover and gets the 3 count a second time.  The ref counts and this time, Oscar doesn’t get up.  Dr. Red Fang just became the Hardcore Champion once again.  As he is handed the title, Scooter J runs in from the crowd and attacks him.  Scooter J drops Fang with a DDT onto the same chair used on Oscar.  Scooter J takes the title and holds it high.  The fans boo and he smirks before dropping it on Fang.  He then walks away.  (22 min)

Madman Mason is backstage with Clarkus Kentus.  He is short and to the point.  “I drove Jack Lawson out of HCW.   Let’s see who will be next.”  Mason walks off.

Backstage, we see the Huber Clan walking around backstage taking food from miscellaneous banquet tables.  Just then, the Muscles Trio return and attack the Hubers.  A peer 6 brawl ensues and it takes half the locker room to break them apart.  This one is not over between them.

Back at commentary, Dash begins “Those Muscles, they should be fined or fired.  They are a menace to the roster.”  J9 glares at him “You know what the Hubers did to them.  If anyone should be fined, it’s them.”  “Bah!” Dash exclaims. 

The next match is ready to begin.  First, the British Crippler comes out to booing from the fans. Dash is mad.  “Why are they booing?  Do they not see talent when it’s kicking them in the face?”  J9 shakes her head.  The British Crippler gets into the ring and begins jaw jacking with the fans.  The music then changes and the fans pop as Violet Valkyrie comes out.  J9 exclaims “Now THERE is the personification of talent.  Everyone’s favorite soccer mom.”  This time, Dash shakes his head and delivers a resounding “PTTHH”.  Violet shakes hands with the fans and enters the ring.  She climbs the second turnbuckle and with both arms in the air, the fans pop louder.  She steps down and stretches her neck and is ready to get this one going.  Through the first 9 minutes of the match, The British Crippler controlled the pace until Violet managed to power out of a rear naked choke hold and dropped Crippler with a jumping knee smash.  Violet followed it up with a Japanese arm drag and a second jumping knee smash.  She made the cover and got the 3 count.  The fans explode with applause as Violet has her arm raised in victory.  Just then, Ladies Champion Catalina Harper comes in from the crowd and chop blocks Violet at the knee.  She begins stomping on it and then is sent out of the ring by the ref.  Violet struggles to stand and her knee gives way but she eventually is able to shake it off and make her way to the back under her own power.  (11 min)

It is announced that ‘Sassy’ Maxine DeVito will be out for some time to recover from the injuries sustained at the hands of Ladies Champion Catalina Harper.  While we don’t like to see our roster injured, we wish her a speedy recovery.

Our next match is ready to go.  Betsy Cummings makes her way out first to booing from the crowd.  Dash tries to speak but J9 shuts him down with a glare.  Next, the music changes and out comes Taylor Bella.  The fans pop for her.  Dash can’t hold back “Really?  The fans boo Betsy but cheer this one?  Taylor is past her prime and taking up valuable space here.  Go home and leave the action to the REAL wrestlers.”  J9 reprimands him “Dash, just give it a rest.  We all know who you favor and your bias is just overwhelming.”

Taylor enters the ring but Betsy is anxious to get this one started and attacks her before the bell.  Betsy managed to control the match but then Taylor exploded with a sitout facebuster.   Hayley Hailstone comes out and begins to mock Taylor distracting her.  Betsy used the distraction to catch Taylor with a running knee lift.  She makes the cover hooking the tights and putting her feet on the ropes for leverage.  The ref counts to 3 and awards the match to Betsy.  Taylor was frustrated and immediately left the ring and chased Hayley to the back.  (18 min)

Backstage, Phat Sol is with Larry Morton.  He says that Wilber cost him opportunities and wants him in the ring again.  Larry asks if that is a smart decision as Wilber is a creepy individual.  Phat Sol says that he will be prepared and will take the fight to this “fiend”.

It is time for our main event.  Smasher #2 comes out first booed by the crowd.  He threatens to hit a few of the fans but restrains himself.  Next, the music changes and out comes the TV Champion the Banker with his manager Ruth Heartless.  They are booed even louder than Smasher #2 was.  The Banker points to his briefcase and in red, has the initials J.L. (assuming this is Jack Lumber) on it next to the big dent.  Dash speaks up “Do you know how much the Banker has to spend on his briefcase only for that tree hugger Jack Lumber to damage it with his big ol’ noggin?”  J9 says “Lumber will get even.  Just you wait and see.”  The Banker gets into the ring and removes his title.  He hands the briefcase to Ruth and holds the TV title over his head.  He hands it to the ref and the match begins.  Smasher #2 hit the Banker hard off the bat and controlled the entire pace of the match.  Just when it looked like he was going to score the win, the Flannel wearing lumberjack Jack Lumber ran out and pulled Smasher #2 by the leg and out of the ring resulting in a disqualification.  Jack then jumped into the ring and began pummeling the Banker until Ruth Heartless ran in and smashed the briefcase against Jack’s back.  The two then took off.  Jack gave chase.  Smasher #2 gets the win via DQ.  (15 min)

Jack Lumber is backstage.  “Banker, this ain’t over between us.  Ruth, your time is coming”.

Dash Woodbrick gets in the ring and is standing next to a throne.  “Come one, come all to the coronation of the NEW King of HCW.”  The fans boo and Dash takes personal offense.  “Shut your fat face.  I present to you…his Royal Majesty, KING and YOUR World Champion, The Wicked Prophet.”  The champ comes out and is carried on his mobile throne.  He mockingly waves to the fans who boo him with intensity.  Prophet gets to the ring and steps off his mobile platform and enters the ring.  Dash takes the robe from the ring attendant and places it on Prophet’s shoulders.  Prophet then sits down on the throne and Dash places the crown on his head.  Prophet holds the World title in front of him.  Dash says “Congratulations your lordship.  The mic is yours.”  He hands the microphone to Prophet who is a man of few words.  “Announcer, Referee, Beloved, Hated, US Champion, World Champion, King. I can be anything I want in wrestling. Who else will be a footnote to my Legacy? Oppose me and you will know famine.”

The show then comes to an end with the booing increasing and Prophet just staring at the camera.

Stay tuned.  More to come.