Hi and welcome back.
In this (lengthy) issue, there are more matches that have been added to the
card. Those include:
Brodus Clay vs EY and Tensai vs Taz
Damian Sandow vs Jerry Lawler for his title shot.
R-Truth and Santino vs Wade Barrett and William Regal
Matt Morgan vs Ezekiel Jackson
Kevin Steen vs Jay Lethal
Abyss vs Tommy Dreamer
Another day comes and it is accompanied by more drama from
our resident drama queen named “The Elitist” Reid Rothchild. This time, Reid
went out and found himself a parking space.
He proceeded to put up “Spot reserved for the Elitist” signs and even
put up ropes to protect “his space”. He
claims he paid for it but was not able to produce a receipt. Of course, Donnie B saw this and called
bullshit. He moved all the barriers out
of the way and proceeded to park there.
This of course led to Reid crying and whining to Master
Bull. Master Bull told him to head to
the ring and air his grievances there. He went down to the ring and called out Donnie
B. DB came out with mic in hand and
promo at the ready.
“Listen up sh*thead, you come out here crying about a
spot. Not a spot on your shirt, not a
liver spot or even your dog Spot but a parking spot. I can’t believe you get your panties in a
bunch over something so stupid. I tell
you what…our match at Wrestlemania; lets add your “spot” as a grand prize – no I don’t mean your dog
Spot. No more whining, or
complaining. I win, its mine. You win, I back off and never park there again. Does that sound acceptable and did I use
small enough words for you to comprehend?” Reid had a mic of his own. “Yeah, I accept you douchbag. I will make you wish you never messed with me
in the first place. Oh, Miiiiiike.” Medley then attacked Donnie B and began to
pummel him. This brought out MW3 and he
chased “the Axe” off.
Master Bull then came out and made a match between Donnie B
and MW3 against Rothchild and Medley. This
was a pretty short match that ended the way we would have expected except that
Reid and Mike were dominating their challengers. At the 8 minute mark, Reid hits a Rothchild
Stunner and DB falls out of the ring. At
the same time, MW3 hits a superkick on Medley and he falls out of the
ring. Donnie B was able to make it back
in before the 10 count but the Axe did not.
DB and MW3 win the match by countout.
Rothchild ended up taking off without his partner. This led to a brief doubleteam on the Axe
until he was able to escape on his own.
He looked around for his tag partner and he was nowhere to be found.
Drama also continued around the Cactus Jack/Mighty Casey/barbwire
bat storyline. Cactus has been looking
for his bat everywhere even falling into a similar pattern that a former ECW’er
did when he lost his best friend (Moppy the mop – yes, a floor mop). Cactus
has been calling out for “Barby” and it seems pretty desperate and sad all at
the same time. While going through some
boxes in the back, Casey attacks Jack with the bat beating him down with
it. Cactus almost manages to get it back
but Casey manages control and chases Jack off.
Mike The Axe was in the back looking for his partner when he
found him (of course) standing in front of a mirror talking to himself. “You know, when you think about all those
before me such as Ravishing Rick Rude, the Narcissist Lex Luger, the Model Rick
Martel, none of them can hold a candle to me.
Hell, I’m even better than the Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiasi, IRS, Hunter
Hearst Helmsley and Alberto del Rio. I
AM the Elitist and everyone is beneath me.”
At that point, he phone rang. He
looked at his phone and smiled as he answered it. “You know, I was just thinking about
you…yeah, I know…later because I have some stuff to take care of.” With that he hung up the phone and just as he
turned around, he literally ran into Alberto Del Rio. “I heard you talking about me. You think you are better than me? Why don’t we take it to ringside and find
out?” Del Rio walked off and Reid was
nervous. He yelled for The Axe and as
soon as he showed up (he took his darn time), they went to ringside.
An impromptu match took place between Del Rio and Reid
Rothchild. Before the match could take
place, Reid threw in a stipulation that he wanted Del Rio’s spot for the World
title picture. Del Rio almost fell over
with laughter. “No. But how about an ass kicking instead?” Del Rio then began to beat Rothchild from
pillar to post. Reid got in a couple of
cheap shots but was being overwhelmed.
Reid tossed Alberto to the ropes and Medley pulled the top rope down and
Alberto went crashing to the floor. As
Reid distracted the ref, Axe tossed ADR back into the ring. Medley began to
walk away. Reid was beside himself and
started yelling at Mike. He was so
distracted that ADR rolled him up and got the pin. Reid then turned around and delivered a
Rothchild Stunner to ADR and left him laying in the ring.
RVD was in the back making a rare appearance when he was
confronted by Abyss. Abyss said he
needed to loosen up and suggested RVD join him for a match. RVD scoffed at him and as he started to walk
away, Abyss attacked him and dragged him to the ring. Abyss dominated the first few minutes but
eventually RVD battled back and with the help of a chair, connected with a Van
Daminator and followed it up with the 5 Star Frog Splash. He was able to get the pin and celebrated in
the ring but the mood quickly turned somber as both regional World Champions
Christian and the Rock made their way down to ringside. There was a staredown and some jaw-jacking
going on but really didn’t amount to much.
RVD walked away and Christian and the Rock both had mics and we assume
they will be discussing their opponents at Wrestlemania. Christian began.
“Well, it looks like Wrestlemania will be the greatest show
on earth. I will be defending my title
against CM Punk. Do you know what CM
stands for? Punk seems to see himself as
a ‘chick magnet’ and while I find that absolutely hilarious, I’m pretty sure he
is serious about it. Punk, the only
thing you’ll be a magnet for will be another loss on your record when I walk
out as the World Champion.”
Rocky’s turn: “The Rock,
here, now, and forever, will be the People’s Champion (not to be
confused with Christian as the Peep’s champ).
The Rock gets to take on Brock Lesnar.
Lesnar, an overblown, inflated egomaniac who thinks he can walk the
Rock’s path, stand toe to toe with the Rock and (gasp) think he can take the
Rock’s belt? Well you are wrong. The Rock will walk out the champion and no
offense Christian, but the Rock will defeat you too and go on to defeat RVD and
become the Undisputed Heavyweight Champion.
This is the Rock’s lot in life.”
Christian got into the Rock’s face and had some words with him before
the two ended up separating.
Mr Meyers was talking in the back with the World Tag Team
Champions Negronomicon and Superstar Billy Pearl. SBP and N were polishing the belts as Mr
Meyers informed them that if they lose the belts at Wrestlemania, he would have
to let them both go. Both were besides
themselves. N started off on a rant
“What do you mean ‘let us go’? We are
the f’n World tag team champions. We are
better than you, than that GM loser who never shows up for work or his lackey –
what’s his name…Master Bullshit?” Both
got a good laugh out of that. Almost on
cue, Master Bull walked in and let them know that in no uncertain terms that he
is backing Mr Meyers 100% and he will be sure that he is the one that will make
sure the door hits them in the asses on their way out. He walked off and let his words sink in. SBP then said “Well, I guess we’d better be
ready.” N agreed.
Nigel McGuinness says he’s stoked that he only has to face
the Stupid Warrior one more time. He
will be sure to embarrass him and send him away with his tail tucked between
his legs. Master Bull came up to him and
said that he had better honor his word because if he does not, he will be out
of a job. Nigel looked surprised but
said that he will fulfill his destiny…defeat the Stupid Warrior and then eventually
become the X-Division champ. He says you
can take that to the bank.
Master Bull and Mr Meyers were having a brainstorming
session. They had decided that they do
not want wrestlers who will show up “every once in a while”. They need to have dedicated full timers. They collectively made the decision that if
the following wrestlers did not win their respective matches (not including
those who’s jobs are on the line), that they would end up modifying their
existing contracts. That list includes Hulk Hogan, Booker T, Jerry Lawler,
Cactus Jack and William Regal. They
would not necessarily be let go but would be set up with a “Legends” contract
and would then only be used where it was felt they could provide the greatest
ROI. This was a reason all of these guys
were participating in Wrestlemania.
The list of guys whose jobs are on the line include the
Negronomicon, Superstar Billy Pearl, Nigel McGuinness,
I guess we’ll see what transpires. Stay tuned.
No comments:
Post a Comment