Wrestling Newsletter Year 5 (2010) 2.9

Hello fans. We have some great news to pass along so let’s get right on it.

The top 10’s are now all set up except for the tag team titles. A tournament will be held to fill the final 2 vacant spots in the top 6 for the tag team titles.

A video arrived at our office and it was from none other than MW3. MW3, in an accompanying note, stated that he wants this vignette run. After checking it out to make sure it wasn’t something horrible (like when HE came back (referring to Superstar Billy Pearl a few years ago)), we ran the video. Enjoy.

The shot is of MW3 sitting on a chair in the dark, a ceiling lamp swinging overhead....showing him and then putting him in the shadows.

"Been having a run of bad luck lately? Watching your career going down the poop-chute? Seeing people less talented, less intelligent, or both get ahead? Watching your paychecks get smaller and you’re worth being valued less?

Welcome to my world.

It seems that the powers that be have deemed that MW3 should suffer. That somehow, while others ruined federations with their legions of flunkies, and you turd-bags know who you are, are getting rewarded, some of us are getting the Shaft. No, not like Richard Roundtree, I'm not talkin' 'bout THAT Shaft.

So I've been put into matches lately...and lets say nothing has gone my way. I'm not gonna bitch about the matches I really lost....those few I did, but the matches where I had some turd on his back, and the ref can't seem to remember how to count to 3. Or when some jack-hole has me on my back, and suddenly the rules of physics bend and 3 seconds comes faster than it should.

Now, I get the ultimate slap in the face. Now I am wrestling the has-beens of the business. These old, broken down penniless bastards who can't seem to let go of the business and do us all a favor and walk their asses off into the sunset and die....no, they come back like a damn crack addict and beg for a shot...and what happens, they put these geezers in with me, and lo and behold some how they get their tights on over their Depends, take an obscene and possibly illegal amount of Geritol and somehow manage to pin MW3, The Masked Sensation.

Got to say...I'm baffled. I called in Scooby-Doo and the Gang in their little green van to solve this one, and they ain't got shit. And if THAT wasn't enough, some douche-bag lawyer in a suit says in my contract is a clause....that I got to wrestle tag team. So now, I got the bookers, the refs and now a bunch of low rent ambulance chasers trying to screw me. I figure how bad can it get, right? I might get a good partner?

Hurricane? Hurri-NO. That guy got up and walked out today. So much for that. Jeff Hardy? Jeff WHO-dy....nope. MVP? MV-uh-un. Golddust? Not so much.... Carilto? Carli-NO. I even asked for the Gold Standard, Shelton Benjamin....I was told, “NO Standard”.

But someone was gracious, and even had the gall to tell me to be grateful that I was going to get someone who would help turn my fortunes around.

The Super-Warrior.

The Super Warrior????!!!???

Now before I could tell them exactly what they could do with that, the low rent suits waived my contract in my face....and to add insult to injury...not only is the SW going to be the Masked Sensation's partner....but we'll be wrestling in the GDWF...yep, the good old Geritol-Depends Wrestling Fed. And it gets even better. Oh yeah...seems that you people out there in TV land liked last weeks match so much, that I have to team up with my idiot partner AGAIN, and wrestle Geriatric Hulk Hogan and the "Nature Moobs" Ric Flair.....AGAIN. In fact, to fulfill my contract and get through this, the Stupid Warrior and I have to wrestle AND beat every one of the tag teams in not only the GDWF, but the HWF and CSWA.

Hogan...Flair....eat your damn fiber....take your heart pills....and pray to God, because until I find a way out of my contract and stop getting screwed by the refs around here, I am going to be beating the hell out you and every other old bastard who can lace their boots and put on tights over their overweight bodies.

And Warrior...I swear to god, you can be a part of the solution that get's me out of here, or you can be a part of the problem...in which case, I am going to do to you what i did to our friend here....."

Camera pans over to the left and there we see, tied to a chair, with a bloody steel chair on the ground next to him is "The Living Legend" Larry Zybysko. Zybysko is in bad shape and is out cold.

"Take a look Warrior....if you screw me, this is going to be you. Hogan...Flair...you're next "brother"....WHOOOOOOOO!!!


In a response to what MW3 posted, the Super Warrior had this to add:

“You know MW3 , I don’t relish being teamed up with you either. The fact that I, a being who is greater than anyone around, has to be tied down to such a mortal as yourself. With my superior intelligence, I can see how this could work out for us. We may not like each other but we have a common ground. I, too, would like to see Hogan and Flair get buried and disappear for good. As the saying goes, the old must make way for the new and we are “the new”. I am above the petty comments you have made but I will promise you that if YOU do not hold up your end of the bargain, your END will come sooner than you can even comprehend. Hogan and Flair: you are the past. We are the future. We will introduce you to pastures unknown and put you out for grazing.

I have accepted one last shot at Mr. Kennedy. Kennedy, there will be no excuses. You will have no where to go. You will need to bring your “A” game as I do not plan on leaving without the gold. If fate intervenes and doesn’t allow for it to happen, then so be it. This warrior has been down in the ashes of a world gone blind and will rise to once again become a superior force to reckon with. So Sayeth the Warrior.”

This was pretty exciting to watch but two people in the back who were watching it didn’t feel the same way. Yes, I’m referring to Hulk “TNA” Hogan and Ric “TNA” Flair. Surprisingly, Hogan and Flair shared the same platform but Hogan, the egomaniac, decided he got to talk first:

“Well you know Super Warrior brother, I have beaten your namesake. The Ultimate Warrior was an ultimate joke. He thought he could carry the world on his shoulders and it was obvious he failed. Like him, brother, you will fail and I will be sure that humiliation follows. And whatcha gonna do when the largest arms in the world and the power of Hulkamania tear you in two….?”

Ric then got on the mic: “Wooo. You know MW3, you talk a good game. You think you can run in the same race as us. That is a laugh. The Nature Boy is the greatest wrestler on the planet. My partner, Hulk Hogan, is the greatest entertainer in the business. Together we will take out any threat and will reign supreme as the tag team champions of the world. My geriatric little finger could whip your ass from Syracuse to San Diego without even breaking a sweat. We have nothing to fear from you two losers and we will be the ones who will be standing victorious. WOOOOOO!”

There are currently two spots left for the tag team titles. A tag team tournament would be held with all members of the roster. There are some teams who are currently getting shots at the titles. If they end up as one of the final two, they will get an additional shot. If the champs win it, then the spot will be left vacant.

The teams participating in this include:

From the CSWA:
DX
Cryme Tyme
Elijah Burke & Shelton Benjamin
Jeff Hardy & the Kraken
Mark Henry & MVP
Matt Hardy & John Morrison
MW3 & the Super Warrior

HWF
Big Show & Fit Finley
Mick Foley & Abyss
Chris Daniels & Kurt Angle
Jay Lethal & Cody Rhodes
Carlito & the Great Khali
The Dudleys
AJ Styles & Charlie Haas
CM Punk & Sting

Interpromotional
Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair

In the first round:
Shawn Michaels is pinned by Matt Hardy following a twist of fate.
MVP and Mark Henry defeated the team of Hogan and Flair after Flair was taken out by MW3 and Hogan was distracted by SW.
Abyss & Mick Foley advanced over the team of CM Punk and Sting.
The Kraken and & Jeff Hardy defeated the team of AJ Styles and Charlie Haas
Cryme Tyme advances over the team of Big Show and Fit Finley
Carlito and the Great Khali advance over the team of MW3 and the Super Warrior after Hogan and Flair came out to distract them.
The Dudleys and Kurt Angle/Chris Daniels went to a 30 minute time limit draw.
Jay Lethal and Cody Rhodes advanced over Elijah Burke and Shelton Benjamin

In the second round:
There is one bye due to the time limit draw between the Dudleys and Angle/Daniels
John Morrison and Matt Hardy got the bye.
Great Khali and Carlito advance over Abyss and Mick Foley
Jay Lethal and Cody Rhodes advance over MVP and Mark Henry.
The Kraken and Jeff Hardy advance after Cryme Tyme got counted out.

In the third round:
Morrison and Hardy advance over Carlito and the Great Khali
Jeff Hardy and the Kraken advance over Lethal & Rhodes

In the finals, the Kraken and Jeff Hardy defeat the team of John Morrison and Matt Hardy. Since they made it this far, Morrison and Matt Hardy will get the 6th spot for the tag team titles.


In a sign of good faith, the teams of Carlito/Khali and Lethal & Rhodes will also be given opportunities. This expands the tag team title hunt to 8 teams. A match was held between these participants to see who would be ranked #7 and #8. Carlito and Khali won the match by countout so they will be ranked higher.

That is all for now.