Hello fans and welcome back to another installment of HCW’s Phoenix Heat. Things are really heating up (no pun intended) between World Champion the Banker and Phoenix GM Master Bull. In the main event, we will see Davis ‘the Hoff’ Hoffmeister get his rematch for the TV title against current champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine. We will also see some 6 Man tag team action as well as a 6 woman tag team match.
The show begins
back in GM Master Bull’s office. Bull hangs up the phone and looks up with a
disgusted look on his face as he sees World Champion the Banker and his manager
Ruth Heartless. The Banker tells Bull
that his days are over ruining the lives of the people on the roster and when
he’s done with Bull, Bull will wish he never messed with him. Master Bull stands up and says “Don’t forget,
your title is on the line when we meet.
I don’t recall ever being World Champion before but it’s an intriguing
thought.” The Banker laughs. “Don’t make me bust a gut laughing. You…a champion? Never.
The only thing you’re good at doing is cleaning toilets.” Bull gets serious. “That mouth is going to get you into
trouble. Since you seem to have a lot of
hot air, tonight you get to be in the ring and your title is on the line. Before you get your tighty whities in a
bunch, you can have your manager with you.”
The Banker sneers. “Well, since I
am the top dog here, I don’t need to stick around as I’m a main eventer.” Bull stops him. “Au contraire mon friar (yes he said it that
way on purpose)…the main event is already in place. You get to be the curtain jerker. Guess what…you’re up.” The Banker glared at him and stormed out. Bull sat down with a satisfied look on his
face.
Pyro goes off and
it looks like our show will kick off with a title match – the first we can
recall where the World title was the first one defended on a show. First, the challenger Superstar Chic Monroe comes
out to a pop from the crowd. He
constantly glances over his shoulder to ensure the Banker doesn’t sneak attack
him again. He gets into the ring and
continues to psyche up the crowd. The
music changes and the fans boo as the World Champion the Banker comes out with
his manager Ruth Heartless. The Banker
has a mic and calls (being the curtain jerker aka the first match on the card)
a travesty and since he no longer has to stick around till the end of the show,
as soon as he beats this Italian meathead, he’s out of here. The Banker gets into the ring and Monroe is
glaring at him. The bell rings and this
one begins. Chic is actually the more
aggressive and for the first 6 minutes of the match, he controlled the
pace. After that point, Ruth got involved
providing the Banker with some words of encouragement (and maybe a foreign
object) and then the match went the champs way.
After a few minutes of pounding on Chic (we still think there’s a
foreign object in there), he rammed Chic shoulder first repeatedly into the
turnbuckle. He then locked in the ATM
Fee armbar and Chic had no choice but to tap out or risk severe damage to his
arm. Chic slapped the mat signaling he
was giving up. The Banker released the
hold but stomped Chic on the head with his boot. Ruth came into the ring and handed the champ
his title. The Banker held the belt high
before flipping the fans off and leaving.
(12 min)
Wilber Townsend is
backstage and for some really odd reason, he’s wearing a mutated version of the
Pennywise the Clown mask. “There’s time
to play in the funhouse but then there’s time to be serious. I’ve been waiting for you Leon. Fire…come walk with me.” He then starts to laugh maniacally. CREEEEPY!
It’s time for the
next match. First, the British Crippler,
Sassy Maxine Devito and Vanilla Zombie all make their way out to the ring. They
are all booed as they saunter down to the ring.
Vanilla though takes her time and just stares at the fans as she makes
her way to the ring. Once in the ring,
the music changes and the fans pop huge as Tempest Fortune, Hayley Hailstone
and the Ladies Champion Violet Valkyrie all make their way to the ring. They
all interact with the fans on their way down.
The heels (bad gals) in the ring motion for their opponents to join
them. The 3 faces (good gals) enter the
ring with gusto and their opponents bail out of the ring. Violet, Tempest and Hayley all climb the
turnbuckles and the fans pop huge for them.
Now it is their turn to plead for their opponents to come back in the
ring and get this match started. They
finally do and the bell rings starting this one off. For the first 5 minutes of the match, the
heels pounded on Violet until Hayley and Tempest had enough and began to clean
house. Violet made the hot tag to Tempest
who ended up dropping the British Crippler with a DDT. She went for a pin but only got a 2
count. Maxine spent most of her time on
the floor feigning (faking) an injury.
She “recovered” enough to help her team triple team the champ
though. After Vanilla Zombie got tagged
in, she hit Tempest with the Soul Crusher but instead of going for a pin, she
threw her over to tag the champ in.
Violet hit the ring like wildfire but Vanilla and the British Crippler
double teamed her. The Crippler hit a
piledriver and went for the pin but Hayley made the save. Just as Hayley was being sent out of the ring
by the ref, Maxine snuck around (see, I knew that injury was phony) and
attacked Hayley slamming her head into the ringside barrier. She then handcuffed Hayley to the barrier effectively
taking her out of the match. Maxine then
pulled Tempest off the apron and Tempest’s head hit the mat and she fell to the
floor. Back in the ring, the British
Crippler tagged Vanilla Zombie back in and reversed an Exploder Suplex and
dropped her with a chokeslam. She went
for the pin and (with a handful of tights) she got the 3 count. Maxine gets in the ring and kicks Violet out
of the ring. The heels stand tall as the
fans look on in disgust and boo the crap out of them. Maxine smiles mockingly at the fans and the
trio then leave. The ref goes out to
help Violet and Tempest and free Hayley from the handcuffs. They were obviously pissed and they all
stormed to the back. (15 min)
The Banker and
Ruth are seen getting into their limo and driving away.
We head back to
the ring for our next match. First, the
Muscles Trio (Muscles Weasley, McGuire and Thorpe) come out wearing their
rainbow colored bull horns. The goof
around on the stage and get a pop from the crowd. They make their way to the ring. After a moment or so, their opponents the Snake
Pit (Tobias, Leiton and Niven Snake) come out and before heading to the ring,
they put their fists together as sort of a salute and then head to the
ring. They too get a small pop from the
crowd. They get into the ring and are
all business. The bell rings and the Muscles
get in a couple of shots off the bat and then the Snake Pit took over. They held the advantage for about 5 minutes
but then consecutive triple teaming from the Muscles gave them control over the
match and they actually held it for quite some time. The Snake Pit got in some good shots and went
for a few pin attempts but they fell shy of that final 3 count. 21 minutes into the match, Tobias catches
Weasley with a lariat. He got distracted when the 5th
Column came out on the stage. The Pit
turned their attention to the interruption and that gave Weasley the moment he
needed to catch Tobias with the Shining Wizard.
Weasley made the cover and got the 3 count. The Muscles Trio get the win however, their
win was short lived as the Column came down armed with steel chairs and
attacked both the Pit and the Muscles beating them down. Baron von Blood got on the mic and after
staring at the carnage in the ring, he called out the 6 Man Tag Team Champions
the Steel Curtain and Biceps Bannerman demanding they get the next title
shot. “We’re the only ones of
consequence standing so I guess this means we get the shot.” Master Bull came out and said that he would
authorize them to get the next shot however they had to leave the ring now and
not attack anyone further. Baron, Karl
Braun and Oswald Zimmerman all laid down their chairs and exited the ring. It looks like we know who’s getting the next
shot at the 6 Man belts. (21 min)
Sassy Maxine
DeVito is backstage. She says its “cute”
to see the little hailstone get all worked up.
She thinks about it and says she will accept a match at the Super Show but
there will be a stipulation…she just doesn’t know what it will be as of yet but
as soon as she thinks of it, she will let her know.
The next match
begins with Leon Teremoto coming out.
The fans pop for him as he makes his way down to the ring. He gets into the ring but before he can do
anything, the lights flicker and then go out.
The fans turn on their cell phone flashlights to help illuminate. Creepy Wilber comes out and welcomes us to
the circus. He says that what the fans
see is all make believe and the real world is one scary place that no one wants
to go. He says that Leon needs to
embrace the darkness and let it go. Wilber says he’ll be the guide. He wants the match tonight to be a “Treehouse
of Horrors” match and promises to unleash the viper in Leon. He makes his way to the ring. Leon looks concerned. Wilber gets in the ring and removes his
creepy mask. He immediately goes after
Leon beating him down. Leon gets in a
few shots but ends up succumbing to the onslaught. Wilber finally ends the match after hitting
the Go To Sleep. Wilber gets the 3 count
and the win. Wilber picks up Leon and the
lights flicker and go out again. They
come on a few seconds later and both Leon and Wilber are gone. Uh Oh.
(11 min)
Davis Hoffmeister
is backstage. He says at the PPV, he
fought the toughest opponent he’s ever faced and that night, Drew the Canadian
Love Machine defeated him. That night,
he was the better man. Tonight will be
different however. He has watched the
tapes and studied Drew when he was the World Champion, the US Champion,
co-holder of the Tag Team titles and recapped it with their PPV match. Davis says he has the formula to regain what
he lost. Tonight, he and Drew face off
again and the outcome will be different.
We are back at the
ring and standing in the ring is Tommy Lightning. Tommy says that the Steel Curtain and Biceps
Bannerman keep hiding from him and the Smashers and are just afraid of
losing. He says that he’s tired of being
overlooked by management so he’s here in the ring now demanding a match. He doesn’t care who he fights. Just then, we hear over the loudspeakers “Gumbo
7:30 means its suppa time, bitch” and out comes the Ragin Cajun Rad Gumbo
alongside his manager Ms. Alexandria. He
gets a pop from the crowd and makes his way down to the ring. Tommy is yelling at him to get in the ring
and fight him like a man. Rad
obliges. This was a short one. Tommy went for an underhook suplex but Rad
nullified it. He then hit Tommy with a
Cottonmouth Clutch and then locked in the New Orleans Crab. Tommy somehow made it to the ropes and didn’t
tap. Rad locks it in again and pulls
Tommy to the center of the ring. This
time, he has no choice but to tap out.
Rad Gumbo gets the win in just 4 minutes. The fans pop as Rad and his manager
leave. Tommy complains to the ref
holding the small of his back. He kicks
the ropes a few times in frustration and then leaves.
We cut backstage
with TV Champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine. Drew says he thanks Davis for all the kind
words and thanks him for a hell of a match at the PPV but Davis is
mistaken. Tonight, Davis becomes the
first victim to fall under Drew’s run as TV champion.
It’s time for our
main event. First, the challenger Davis
Hoffmeister comes out to a HUGE pop from the crowd. He interacts with the fans and then gets into
the ring. He climbs each corner
turnbuckle to louder and louder pops from the crowd. He steps down and waits for his
opponent. The music changes and the TV
Champion Drew the Canadian Love Machine comes out to an equally loud pop. He comes out wearing the title and raises his
arms as pyro goes off behind him. He
takes the title off and walks down to the ring.
He puts the belt over his shoulder and climbs into the ring. He stands in the middle of the ring and holds
his title high. He stands in the middle
of the ring and stands face to face with Davis.
The two shake hands but don’t release.
They stare at each other for another moment and then release and step
back to their respective corners. Drew
hands the title to the ref who holds it up signaling the belt is on the
line. He turns and calls for the bell to
start the match. The match began slow as the two competitors sized each other
up. After 9 minutes, the niceties ended and
the gloves came off.
=====
In the 10th minute of the match: =====
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister executes a CHOKE IN CORNER....
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine attempts to defend against CHOKE IN CORNER but is
unsuccessful.
=====
In the 11th minute of the match: =====
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister executes a CLOTHESLINE....
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine absorbs the punishment.
=====
In the 12th minute of the match: =====
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine executes a THE LOVER BOMB....
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister executes a ROUNDHOUSE KICK....
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine is attempting a pin!!!
1...
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister kicks out of the pin!
=====
In the 13th minute of the match: =====
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine executes a LA CASITA....
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister executes a MONKEY FLIP....
=====
In the 14th minute of the match: =====
The ref
gets bumped accidentally but is only distracted for a moment.
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister executes a MONKEY FLIP....Just
then, the Banker came in from the crowd and smashes a steel chair over Davis’s
head. Davis is stunned. The Banker takes off before anyone notices
him.
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine executes a CORKSCREW PESCADO....
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine is attempting a pin!!!
1...2...3
Davis
"the Hoff" Hoffmeister was pinned by Drew the Canadian Love
Machine!!!
Drew
the Canadian Love Machine wins with a CORKSCREW PESCADO over Davis "the
Hoff" Hoffmeister!!!
Drew gets the win
and retains the title. The Banker has
screwed Davis out of his title shot. I’m
sure this will not sit well and he will probably have something to say next
week.
Stay tuned as
things are about to get dicey.
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